宋飞正传（1990）

Seinfeld S04E19

Part 3 March 3, 2022, 1:18 p.m.

Bass, Jerry.
不是萨尔蒙，是巴斯
Instead of salmon, he went with bass.
他只是换了个名字
He just substituted one fish for another.
瞧，你这个笨蛋，首先，是“萨尔曼”，而不是“萨尔蒙”
Look, you idiot, first of all, it's "Salman," not "salmon."
杰瑞，杰瑞，你没注意到总体情况
Jerry, Jerry, you're missing the big picture.
好吧，也许你是对的但听着，我要去准备…
All right. Maybe it is, but listen, I gotta get ready...
…西卓拉要来了你要是不介意的话…
...Sidra's coming over so if you don't mind...
怎么，你叫她来了？ - 我想今晚就要搞明白
What, did you ask her? - I'm gonna find out tonight.
好的
Yes.
你为什么需要死亡证明？
Why do you need a death certificate?
那个，艾伦伍德医生…
Well, Dr. Allenwood...
我打算编辑一个…
...I was hoping to compile an...
…大家公认的关于她的简介
...admittedly rudimentary scrapbook of her life.
就是一些贝丝蒂可以保存的东西
Something that Betsy could have and hold on to.
嗯，我想我可以复印一份给你
Well, I suppose I could make a copy of it.
哦，那太好了
Oh, that would be wonderful.
嗯，很高兴认识你，乔治 - 我也是
Well, it's nice meeting you, George. - Likewise.
你在干什么？
What are you doing?
什么？ - 你…
What? - Did...?
你刚把薯片蘸了两下？
Did you just double dip that chip?
什么？ - 你把薯片蘸了两下
Excuse me? - You double dipped the chip.
蘸了两下？你在说些什么？
Double dipped? What are you talking about?
你拿薯片蘸了下酱，吃了一口…
You dipped the chip. You took a bite...
…然后又蘸了一下
...and you dipped again.
怎么了？ - 就像把你整张嘴…
So? - It's like putting your whole mouth...
…放到酱里面蘸
...right in the dip.
从现在开始，你要吃薯片只准蘸一下，然后吃掉它
From now on, when you take a chip just take one dip and end it.
噢，不好意思，提米…
Well, I'm sorry, Timmy...
…但我不喜欢那样蘸
...but I don't dip that way.
噢，你不喜欢？ - 不喜欢
Oh, you don't, huh? - No.
你按你的方式蘸…
You dip the way you wanna dip...
…我按我的方式来
...l'll dip the way I wanna dip.
给我薯片 - 嘿，嘿，嘿！
Give me the chip. - Hey, hey, hey!
把薯片给我！
Give me the chip.
我不知道我在这里干什么我一定是疯了
I don't know what I'm doing here. I must be crazy.
嘿，你介意换个位置吗？ - 为什么？
Hey, you mind switching seats? - Why?
不知道，我喜欢坐在别人的左边这让我感觉好像在开车
I don't know. I like sitting to the left of people. Makes me feel like I'm driving.
好吧
Okay.
你最近怎样？ - 很好
How you doing? - Good.
你好吗？ - 很好
How you doing? - Good.
感觉不错
Feel good.
你知道简·曼斯菲尔德的胸很大吧
You know that Jayne Mansfield had some big breasts.
真的很大…
Really big...
巨大，就快从她衣服顶部出来都快让她窒息了
Huge. Just coming out the top of her dress. They were choking her.
我听说她就是这样死的 - 是的
I hear that's how she died. - Yeah.
你注意到今天的那个女的没…？
Have you noticed that women today are...?
你知道，她的胸看起来更大
You know, they seem bigger.
很多女性都有隆胸 - 真的吗？
A lot of women are having them done. - Really?
是的 - 你怎么看？
Yeah. - How do you like that?
很多人问我是否做过手术
A lot of people ask me if I've had mine done.
人都是这样的
You know people.
有些烦人，这关他们什么事
Gets a little tiring. It's none of their business.
哦，神经病
Oh, the nerve.
你知道，还有人问我你是否做过手术
You know some people have asked me if you've done that.
你是怎么回答的？
And what do you tell them?
你想让我怎么回答
Whatever you want me to tell them.
嗯，我想你很快就知道了
Well, I think you'll find out soon enough.
你不去开门吗？ - 不
Aren't you gonna get that? - No.
嗯，要是紧急事件怎么办？ - 哦，这里没有紧急事件
Well, what if it's an emergency? - Oh, there's no emergency.
杰瑞，快来，是紧急事件
Jerry. Come on. It's an emergency.
等我一下
Excuse me.
好的
All right.
什么？你妨碍到我们了
What is it? You're interrupting.
我在为去波多黎各打包需要借用你的泳裤
I'm packing for Puerto Rico. I need to borrow your bathing suit.
这是紧急事件吗？你需要我的泳裤？
This is an emergency? You need a bathing suit?
我喜欢你的泳裤
Well, I like yours.
我不知道，我的泳裤？这太过亲昵了吧
I don't know, my bathing suit? That's a little familiar.
我不想你的小♥弟♥弟♥塞在我的泳裤里
I don't want your boys down there.
我小♥弟♥弟♥怎么了？
What's the matter with my boys?
你的小♥弟♥弟♥就应该待在隔壁
Your boys should stay in their neighborhood.
行了，给我吧 - 好吧，泳裤在最上面的抽屉里
All right, come on. - All right. It's in the top drawer.
赶快 - 嘿
Hurry up. - Hey.
你好，杰瑞 - 你好，伊莲
Hi, Jer. - Hi, Elaine.
哦，你好，西卓拉 - 你好，伊莲？
Oh, hi, Sidra. - Hi. Elaine?
你来这里干什么？ - 找克莱默
What are you doing here? - Looking for Kramer.
怎么了？ - 她只是…
What's going on? - She was just...
…给我看波多黎各的照片
...showing me pictures of places in Puerto Rico.
你们两个一起去的照片 - 哦，是的，好吧
When you two went down there. - Oh, yeah. All right.
好吧，快… - 你知道，这些…
Well, just... - You know, these...
是的，是的 - 好吧
Yeah, yeah. - All right.
我们说到哪了？
So where were we?
我正要离开 - 好吧，你打算走了
I was just leaving. - Right. You were leaving.
我不敢相信你让一位女生进桑拿做那种事？
I can't believe you sent a woman into the sauna to do that?
那是个意外
That was an accident.
我觉得你们都是神经病
I think you're both mentally ill.
顺便说一下，它们是真的且十分壮观
And by the way, they're real and they're spectacular.
住口，乔治，滚出去，滚出去我再也不想见到你！
Stop it, George. Get out. Get out! I never wanna see you again.
滚回纽约去！ - 滚出去
Go back to New York. - Get out.
好吧，先生您只需提供死亡证明就可以走了
All right, sir. Now all I need is a death certificate and you'll be on your way.
嗯，事情是这样的…
Well, you see what happened was...
…医生，那个主治我姑妈的医生…
...the doctor, the very same doctor that was attending my late aunt suffered...
…意外中风
...an untimely stroke...
右手瘫痪了，所以…
...and lost the use of his right hand so...
…显然，我无法取到死亡证明
...obviously I was unable to get the death certificate.
不过，我还是搞到这个
However, I do have this.
这是什么？ - 我在棺材旁的一张照片
What's this? - A picture of me next to the coffin.
想得美 - 还差得远，对吗？
Nice try. - Not even close, huh?
是的
No.
人们现在已经了解整形手术的程序…
The cosmetic surgery procedures that are available to people today...
抽脂术，大家都知道吧？
Liposuction. Are you familiar with this?
就是拿抽脂机抽脂肪
This is a fat-sucking machine.
现在，你知道，在有些地方有些人在努力研究…
Now, you know, somewhere, somebody is working on a way...
…让这东西进入餐馆
...that this thing could go into a restaurant.
你可以直接从菜单上点
And you could just order it off the menu.
给我起司蛋糕，(把抽脂机）调到最大…
Give me the cheesecake, crank me up to nine...
…还有，加一勺冰激凌在旁边
...and put a scoop of ice cream on the side.