宋飞正传（1990）

Seinfeld S04E13

Part 3 March 3, 2022, 1:17 p.m.

Oh, hey. - Hey.
为什么我没收到圣诞卡？
How come I didn't get a Christmas card?
其他人都收到了
Everybody else got one.
杰瑞收到了，克莱默收到了
Jerry got one. Kramer got one.
我们不是好朋友嘛我却没有收到圣诞卡，没收到
I thought we were good friends. I don't get a Christmas card. I don't get it.
你要圣诞卡？你真的要圣诞卡？好吧，给你
You want a Christmas card? You want a Christmas card? All right, here.
给你圣诞卡
Here's your Christmas card.
有没有麦片？
You got any Double Crunch?
我想有的
Yeah, I think I do.
那是什么香水？ - 海之香
What's that perfume? - It's the ocean.
那是我的，那是我想出来的
That's mine. That's my smell.
杰瑞，让那个模特给我约CK
Jerry, get that model to get me an appointment with Calvin Klein.
不行，她不会回我的电♥话♥…
I can't. She won't return my calls...
…因为她瞥见我在等红灯时挖鼻孔
...because she caught me in a pick at a light.
我记得你说的是抓 - 她不这么想
I thought you said it was a scratch. - That's not what she thinks.
打到她的代理处，也许她不在镇上她没收到电♥话♥
Call her agency. Maybe she's been out of town and didn't get the calls.
明白
Get it.
好吧
All right.
我会打给代理处
I'll call the agency.
你好
Hello.
我找提亚·凡·坎普
I'm trying to get in touch with Tia Van Kamp.
她在镇上吗？
Do you know if she's been in town?
是吗？
Oh, really?
好的，非常感谢 - 什么？
Well, thank you very much. - What?
她在镇上她现在就在CK那里
She has been in town. She's at Calvin Klein right now.
我们走
Let's go.
这次会不同我发誓
It'll be different this time. I promise.
我发誓会不一样我一定会改
I promise difference. I'm committed to difference.
我需要一个比较沉稳的人
I need someone a little more stable.
我不沉稳吗？我就像一块石头
I'm not stable? I'm like a rock.
我把眼镜拿掉，你根本分辨不出我和石头有什么不同
I take these glasses off, you can't tell the difference between me and a rock.
我把眼镜放在石头上你知道人们怎么想吗？
I put these glasses on a rock, you know what jumps into people's minds?
克斯坦萨
Costanza.
人们不会改变 - 我会改，我会
People don't change. - I change. I change.
两周前我尝了半熟的蛋
Two weeks ago, I tried a soft-boiled egg.
以前不喜欢，但现在我把一片烤面包浸在里面，我喜欢上了
Never liked it before. Now, I'm dunking a piece of toast in there and loving it.
我不是一个半熟的蛋
I'm not a soft-boiled egg.
我也不是一片烤面包
And I am not a piece of toast.
我不觉得我们有什么共同爱好
I just don't think that we have anything in common.
那没关系
That's okay. That's good.
你觉得路易斯·巴斯德和他的妻子有什么共同点吗？（巴氏消毒法、狂犬疫苗发现者）
You think Louis Pasteur and his wife had anything in common?
他整天和母牛呆在田里然后挤奶…
He was in the fields all day with the cows and the milk...
…观察牛奶，研究牛奶喝牛奶
...examining the milk, delving into milk, consumed with milk.
加热杀菌，匀化
Pasteurization. Homogenization.
而她呆在厨房♥ 两手拿靴子拍蟑螂
And she was in the kitchen, killing cockroaches with a boot on each hand.
为什么会有那么多蟑螂？
Why were there so many cockroaches?
因为屋子里放了许多蛋糕…
Because there was a lot of cake lying around the house...
…放在那里旁边还有做实验剩下来的牛奶
...just sitting there with all the excess milk from the all experiments.
他们处得来吗？ - 是，是
And they got along? - Yes. Yes.
她不懂什么加热杀菌
She didn't know about pasteurization.
他不知道什么熏蒸但是他们就这么过
He didn't know about fumigation. But they made it work.
你不能进去 - 我要见卡尔文
You can't go in. - I want to talk to Calvin.
我要跟卡尔文谈谈 - 等一下
Let me talk to Calvin. - Wait.
我只是想跟卡尔文谈谈 - 克莱默？
I just want to talk to Calvin. - Kramer?
提亚，你好 - 你是谁？
Oh, Tia, hi. - Who are you?
我来这谈谈海之香的事
I'm here to talk about the ocean.
对，克莱默
Oh, yes, Kramer.
我知道了你先走吧，提亚
I think I know something about this. Would you excuse us, Tia?
我不想找什么麻烦，卡尔文 - 我也是
I don't want any trouble, Calvin. - Neither do I.
你好，你在这啊
Hello. There you are.
你好，你来这干什么？
Hello. What are you doing here?
我要跟你谈谈你没回我电♥话♥
I had to talk to you. You haven't returned my calls.
这几天我很忙
Well, I've been busy.
我觉得我们相处很愉快我能想到的唯一理由就是…
I thought we had a good time. The only explanation I could come up with is...
…你觉得正好看到我…
...you think that you caught me...
我不想谈这些
I'd rather not talk about this.
但是明显我的手指在鼻孔外
But I was clearly on the outer edge of the nostril.
我知道自己看到了什么 - 但我没有挖
I know what I saw. - But there was no pick.
我没有挖，根本没挖
I did not pick. There was no pick.
我该走了 - 不，我没有挖
I gotta go. - No. No pick.
事情是这样的，卡尔文
Now here's the scoop, Calvin.
去年一月我来这和你的一个手下谈过
I came in here last January to talk to one of your flunkies.
有意思的脸
Interesting face.
当我告诉他关于海滩香水的设想时…
And when I told him my idea about the beach cologne...
…你知道吗，他嘲笑我
...you know, he laughed at me.
看上去你的身体很柔软，是吗？很优美
You're very lithe, aren't you? Very graceful.
对，是的
Well, yeah.
坐下 - 好吧
Sit down. - All right.
你很瘦，但很强健
You're very lean. But muscular.
我很会照顾自己我很注意自己的饮食
You know, I try to take care of myself. I watch what I eat.
就在最近，我戒了糖果
Just recently, I cut out fructose.
你很吸引人
I think you're spectacular.
我说过，佛瑞德我朋友的邻居拍的
I told you, Fred. My friend's next-door neighbor took it.
然后呢？
So, what happened?
我…我少扣了一粒纽扣我忘了扣上
Well, l... I must have missed a button. I forgot to button it.
我实在不明白少扣粒纽扣会像那样
I really don't see how you could miss a button like that.
你从来没有少扣纽扣？
Oh, you've never missed a button?
是 - 是你的姐姐，盖尔
Yeah. - It's your sister, Gail.
天哪，我的外甥
Oh, God. My nephew.
你好，盖尔
Hi, Gail.
好
Yeah.
是的，盖尔，我知道他有多大
Yes, Gail, I know how old he is.
你好，小乳♥头♥，那份原稿我可以拿走吗？
Hey, Nip, you need that manuscript, or can I take it?
拿走，拿走不要再叫我小乳♥头♥
Take it. Take it. And stop calling me Nip.
那是意外
It was an accident.
应该放在什么地方看看他的床垫下
Well, it's gotta be somewhere. Look under his mattress.
关于专题小组？我跟这个毫无关系
About the focus group? I have nothing to do with the focus group.
哦耶
Oh, yeah.
他很性感…
He's sexual...
…健壮，而又没有一丝不自然
...athletic and without a trace of self-consciousness.
他的臀部很吸引人
His buttocks are sublime.
他的胸部可以修饰下带他到健身房♥
His pectorals could use some work. Get him into the weight room.
不，今天就带他到摄影棚我们可以马上弄好
No. Let's get him in the studio today. We could send these out immediately.
你又做了蠢事，C.K.
You've done it again, C.K.
我真做了又怎么样？虽然我什么都没做，以后也不会
And what if I did do it? Even though I admit to nothing and never will.
对我又有什么区别？
What does that make me?
我不只在为自己辩护还有所有被抓住在挖鼻孔的人
I'm not just defending myself, but all those pickers who have been caught.
他们每一个…
Each and every one of them...
…都遭受耻辱就是因为有你这样的人
...who has to suffer the shame and humiliation because of people like you.
我们难道不是人？挖鼻子的人体内流动的不也是血吗？
Are we not human? If we pick, do we not bleed?
我不是动物
I am not an animal.
我并不是故意裸♥露♥自己，但是告诉你，现在我倒希望自己这么做了
I did not bare myself deliberately, but I tell you, I wish now that I had.
因为暴露的那个人不是我而是你
Because it is not me that has been exposed, but you.
我在你的灵魂里看到了那个乳♥头♥
For I have seen the nipple on your soul!
从我开始走上她家楼梯的那一分钟起…
So the minute I started up the steps to her apartment...
…我知道自己犯了个可怕的错误
...I knew I made a terrible mistake.
跟她回去
Going back with her.
到了她的房♥间她去了浴室
So we're in her apartment. She goes into the bathroom.
我诅咒自己我该怎么离开？
I'm cursing myself. Now how do I get out of there?
然后我突然想到
And then it hits me like a bolt of lightning.
挖鼻孔
The pick.
挖？ - 挖？
The pick? - The pick?
她从浴室出来我抬起手腕
She comes out of the bathroom, I'm in up to my wrist.
你可以想到她的表情
You should've seen the look on her face.
我想我见过那种表情
I think I've seen that look.
我拿到杂♥志♥了内衣广♥告♥出来了
Hey, I got the magazine. The underwear ad came out.
CK
Hey, Calvin Klein!
看上去很不错 - 很整洁
Hey, you look great! - Neat.
他们确实在你的胸上下了功夫
Boy, they really worked on your pectorals.
是啊 - 你的臀部很吸引人
Well. - Your buttocks are spectacular.
天哪 - 什么