宋飞正传（1990）

Seinfeld S04E09

Part 2 March 3, 2022, 1:17 p.m.

真的？
Really?
噢，见鬼，我刚刚想起来我该走了
Oh, damn it. I just remembered I gotta go.
煤气，电灯和盆里的水忘关了
I left something on. The gas, the lights, the water in the tub.
某些地方有某些事要做，那么我就去…
Something is on somewhere, so I'm just gonna get the...
你知道《小丑》的故事吗，内达？
Do you know the story of Pagliacci, Nedda?
我是伊莲
I'm Elaine.
他是一个妻子对他不忠的小丑
He's a clown whose wife is unfaithful to him.
你认为我是个小丑吗，内达？
Do you think I'm a clown, Nedda?
我认为你是小丑吗？不，不至于成为小丑
Do I think you're a clown? No. Not if it's bad to be a clown.
如果小丑真的那么不好的话那么你绝对不是小丑
If it's bad to be a clown, then you are definitely not a clown.
但如果成为小丑是件好事的话那么我将重新考虑所有事情
But if it's good to be a clown, then I would have to rethink the whole thing.
你背叛了我，和别人在一起了是吗，内达？
You've betrayed me with another, haven't you, Nedda?
他是谁？我要你告诉我他是谁
Who is he? I want you to tell me who he is.
我要他的名字，告诉我他的名字
I want his name. Tell me his name.
噢，说得所有男人都会看上我似的，拜托
Oh, like any man would ever look at me. Come on.
我要出去了
I'm gonna get out of here.
小丑杀了他的妻子
Pagliacci kills his wife.
呃，那真是糟糕，那根本不是一件好事
See? Now that's terrible. That is... That's not a nice thing to do at all.
我假设…我根本不知道小丑的结果是怎样的
I would assume... I don't know how this Pagliacci thing turns out.
但我会假设那小丑会有很大很大的麻烦
But I would assume that there was big, big trouble for that clown.
你不能走
You're not leaving.
但是，警官，他恐吓我
But, officer, he threatened me.
我不明白了，那是不对的
I don't understand. That's not right.
那如果是美国总统呢？我赌你们就会去调查了
What if it was the president of the U.S.? I bet you'd investigate.
那么，有什么不一样呢？我是一名美国喜剧演员
So, what's the difference? I'm a comedian of the United States.
而且我告诉你，我现在压力很大
And I'll tell you, I'm under just as much pressure.
好吧，谢了，好的，再见
All right. Thanks anyway. Okay, bye.
是谁啊？ - 乔治
Who is it? - It's George.
你现在锁门了？ - 嗯
You're locking the door now? - Yeah.
看看你
Well, well. Look at you.
这里有点显得马马虎虎了，是吧？
It's a little skimpy there, isn't it?
你知道我上一次穿这东西是什么时候
You know the last time I wore this thing?
六年前
Six years ago.
当我在博比·莱顿的婚礼上敬酒时
When I made that toast at Bobby Leighton's wedding.
噢，那次敬酒敬得真烂
Oh, that was a bad toast.
没那么差吧
It wasn't that bad.
我还没听过有人在敬酒时骂人的
I never heard anybody curse in a toast.
我只是想让他们放松一点
I was trying to loosen them up a little bit.
当时有老人在场
There were old people there.
所有的亲戚你就像罗德·福克斯的录音一样
All the relatives. You were like a Redd Foxx record.
敬酒结束后，都没人喝醉
At the end of the toast, nobody even drank.
他们都只是站着，人们像是被冻住了
They were just standing. They were just frozen. People...
那可能是全时期最差的敬酒之一了
That might have been one of the worst all-time toasts.
即使如此，她爸爸也没必要那样赶我走
Still, her father didn't have to throw me out like that.
他本应该让我走的他紧紧卡住我的脖子
He could've asked me to leave. He had me in a headlock.
苏珊今晚不去了
Susan's not going tonight.
你是什么意思，不去了？为什么不去？
What do you mean, not going? Why not?
她必须得去机场接个朋友
She had to pick up a friend at the airport.
这票花了我100美元
It cost me $ 100, this ticket.
为什么她不付她自己那份钱 - 这是个好问题
Why didn't she pay for hers? - That's a very good question.
她和我去吃饭她根本不会碰帐单
She and I go to dinner, she doesn't even reach for the check.
我只要求她碰一下这要求很过分吗？
All I'm asking for is a reach. Is that so much to ask for?
碰一碰是真的很好
It's nice to get a reach.
谁啊？ - 是我！
Who is it? - It's me!
你干嘛把门锁上了？
Why are you locking the door now?
因为德沃拉，进来
Because of Davola. Get in here.
这…
What the...?
你怎么不♥穿♥好衣服？ - 我穿好了啊
How come you're not dressed? - I am dressed.
你就这样穿着去？ - 是的，我要你听我说些事
You're going like this? - Yeah. I want you to hear something.
你说的，人们都盛装去看歌♥剧 - 呃，人们是这样的，我不是
You said people dress up for opera. - Well, people do. I don't.
如果你穿成那样去我也不♥穿♥成这样了
If you're going like that, I'm not going like this.
等一等！你们认为我很舒服吗？
Wait a minute! Do you think I'm comfortable here?
我不能换，我没衣服在这里
I can't change. I got no clothes here.
你必须那样穿着去，我不能一个人穿成这样
You gotta go like that. I can't go like this alone.
既然我家比较近，我为什么要穿得不舒服呢
Why should I be uncomfortable because my apartment is closer?
那不是一件事，我们是朋友
That's not the issue. We're friends.
如果我穿得不舒服，你也应该如此
If I gotta be uncomfortable, you gotta too.
好吧，我就这么穿了去听歌♥剧已经够糟糕的了
All right. I'll wear this. It's bad enough I gotta go to the opera...
我还得坐在奥齐·纳尔逊的旁边 (已故美国乐队主唱、演员)
...I gotta sit next to Ozzie Nelson over here.
你不能关小一点吗？那是什么鬼东西来的？
Would you turn that down? What is that crap?
《小丑》
It's Pagliacci.
噢，漂亮
Oh, beautiful.
我们这有点小问题我们有两张多余的票
We got a little problem here. We got two extra tickets.
怎么会，发生什么了？ - 苏珊不去了
Why, what happened? - Susan isn't going...
伊莲的朋友也不去了 - 太神奇了，我们可以倒卖♥♥这些票
...and Elaine's friend isn't going. - Fantastic. We'll scalp the tickets.
我们一张票可能会挣500块
We can make maybe 500 a ticket.
真的？ - 噢，是啊
Really? - Oh, yeah.
人们都在寻找票吗？
People are looking for tickets here?
开玩笑吧，开幕之夜帕瓦罗蒂主演的《小丑》？
Are you kidding? Opening night, Pavarotti in Pagliacci?
我们将赚钱了 - 噢，兄弟，我就知道我喜欢歌♥剧
We're gonna clean up. - Oh, man, I knew I'd love the opera.
是啊，对 - 走吧，我们去拿票
Yeah, right. - Come on, let's go get the tickets.
听着，我得等伊莲到时在戏院和你们碰面
Listen, I gotta wait for Elaine. I'll meet you at the theater.
好的 - 倒卖♥♥不是非法的吗？
All right, yeah. - Isn't scalping illegal?
噢，是的
Oh, yeah.
你用比安卡（口气清新剂）喷他的眼睛啦？
You sprayed him in the eyes with Binaca?
樱桃味的，还是新的呢
Cherry Binaca. It's new.
看，我搞不懂了首先他们出的是普通口味的
See, I don't get that. First they come out with regular.
一年后，他们就有樱桃口味的了
A year later, they have cherry.
他们明知道我们喜欢樱桃味就应该先出樱桃味，再出普通味的
They know we like cherry. Start with cherry. Then come out with regular.
就像是我一点都不了解他他像是换了个人似的
It was like I didn't know him. He was a different person.
你应该从我那疯子那打听些消息
You should hear the message from my nut.
乔治和克莱默哪去了？我不想站这里了我想进去了
Where's George and Kramer? I wanna get inside already.
我感到非常容易受到伤害
I feel very vulnerable.
你在做什么？那是我的钱
What you doing? That's my quarter.
不，不是，是我的 - 我刚掉地上的，是我的
No, it's not. It's mine. - I was just flipping it. That's mine.
不，是我掉的，它是我的
No, I dropped it. It's mine.
好吧，你要的话就拿着但别和我说它是你的
All right, you want it, take it, but don't try and tell me it's yours.
它就是我的
Well, it is mine.
怎么了，你认为我很在意这钱？
What, you think I care about the money?
你真是那么想的吗？我来让你看看
Is that what you think? I'll show you.
看，这是一美元，看着
Look at this. Here's a dollar. Look.
这就是我多么在意钱
That's how much I care about money.
你认为我很在意钱吗？那就是我多么在意钱
You think I care about money. That's how much I care about money.
你干嘛不滚呢？ - 那你又干嘛不滚呢？
Why don't you get lost? - Why don't you?
因为我本来就站在这里 - 噢，是吗？
Because I was standing here. - Oh, yeah?
是啊
Yeah.
我有点喜欢上这剧场拥挤的人群了我感觉很强悍
I kind of like this opera crowd. I feel tough.
有人遇到问题吗？
Anybody else got a problem?
嘿，小丑 - 小丑
Hey, clown. - Clown.
让我们笑一下啊，小丑
Make us laugh, clown.
脸真好看，小丑 - 让我笑一下啊，小丑
Nice face, clown. - Make me laugh, clown.
我有两张，我有两张《小丑》的票
I got two. I got two. Pagliacci.
有人需要票吗，哼？来啊，伟大悲剧的小丑
Who needs Pagliacci, huh? Come on, the great tragic clown.
来看看吧，他笑，他哭，他唱，《小丑》
Come on, check it out. He laughs, he cries, he sings. Pagliacci.
这有两张好东西，看看吧
I got two beauties right here. Check it out.
好吧 - 嘿，嘿，你们在卖♥♥东西吗？
All right. - Hey, hey, you selling?
是啊
I'm selling.
什么来的？ - 管弦乐，G排，死亡中心，首演
Where are they? - Orchestra, row G, dead center. Primo.
如果你认为你死了的话就去天堂去吧
You think you died and went to heaven.
你要卖♥♥多少？
What do you want for them?
我会告诉你的，你看上去是个好人
I'll tell you what I'll do. You look like a nice guy.
两张，1000美元
A thousand dollars for the deuce.
两张我给你500 - 好啊，成交
Give you $500 for the pair. - Yeah. It's a deal.
不 - 什么？不？你疯了吧
No. - What, no? Are you crazy?
来，让我来处理这事 - 500啊，很大手笔了
Look, let me handle this. - That's $500. That's a great deal.
你正在搞砸呢，这人是个鸽子(傻子)
You're blowing it. The guy's a pigeon.
噢，天哪，看，他走了你是怎么了？
Oh, God, see, he's walking away. What is wrong with you?
300块的利润啊
That was a $300 profit.
我知道我在做什么，乔治
I know what I'm doing here, George.
这不是Metallica音乐会这是场歌♥剧，好吧？
This is not a Metallica concert. It's an opera, all right?