好汉两个半（2003）
Two and a Half Men S06E12
Part 3
Nov. 18, 2020, 9:11 a.m.
我非常抱歉
Mom never really made it home from Woodstock.
我妈一般在伍德斯托克音乐节时都不在家
Don't be silly. She's delightful.
别说傻话了 她是个很可爱的人
I'm just gonna close this up now.
我得把这个合上了
Don't mind me.
别管我
I'm just gonna a roll a fatty in the backyard and zone out in the hammock.
我要去后院的吊床上消耗脂肪
Ah, that hit the spot.
太过瘾了
I'm glad you liked it.
我很高兴你喜欢
The best part of a root beer float? Your burps taste good.
漂浮冰激凌根汁汽水 最妙之处在于 打嗝的味道很好闻
Listen, Janine, thanks for everything,
听着 珍妮 谢谢你的晚餐
but I should probably get this little guy home and come back.
但我得把这个小家伙送回家之后再回来
It's way past his bedtime.
早就过了他的睡觉时间了
What are you talking about? It's not past my bedtime.
你说什么啊? 现在不是我睡觉的时间
What do you wanna bet he falls asleep in the car and I have to carry him in?
你跟我赌不赌 他会在车里睡着 我还得把他背进屋?
What do you wanna bet he has to go home and take a laxative
你赌不赌 他回家得吃泻药
because he's too old to poop normal?
因为他老得大便都不规律了?
All right, that's it! Not in the face! Not in the face!
行了 到此为止! 别打我的脸! 别打我的脸!
What? Stop that! He's kidding. I never hit him.
什么? 别装了! 他开玩笑呢 我从没打过他
Jake, tell her you're kidding.
杰克 告诉她你在开玩笑
I'm kidding about that, but he can be verbally abusive.
我开玩笑的 但是他会骂我
Not funny, Jake.
你玩笑开过头了 杰克
The liquor makes him mean.
常喝酒让他变得很刻薄
Okay, I didn't want to have to do this,
好吧 我本不想这么做
but I am calling your father, let him deal with you.
但我要给你♥爸♥打电♥话♥ 让他收拾你
I'm gonna go straighten up in the kitchen.
我先去厨房♥了
You don't know who you're messing with.
你不知道自己在和谁作对
Are you kidding? I think she's gorgeous!
开什么玩笑? 我觉得她美极了!
You don't know who you're messin' with.
你才不知道自己在和谁作对
I'm sorry about that. Hang on.
对不起 等一下
Charlie, now is not a good time.
查理 现在不方便说话
All right, put him on.
好吧 让他接电♥话♥
I can't talk now, Dad. I'm about to get lucky with an older woman.
我没时间说话 老爸 我正在钓一个老女人呢
What? Where are you? Jake? Jake?
什么? 你在哪里? 杰克? 杰克?
Alan, would you be totally weirded out by a little mother-daughter tag team?
艾伦 你介不介意和母女玩3P?
I hope you're happy.
你满意了吧
I hopeyou'rehappy.
你满意了吧
I could've been happy.
我本来可以很满意的
u gonna tell me what happened tonight?
你们不打算告诉我今晚发生了什么事吗?
You don't wanna know.
你不会想知道的
Where are you going?
你去哪儿?
I'm a 14-year-old boy who recently got ear-boob.
我是个耳朵刚挨到女人胸部的14岁男孩
Where do you think I'm going?
你觉得我要去哪儿?
Ear-boob?
耳朵挨到胸部?
You don't wanna know.
你不会想知道的
So how'd it go with Melissa?
你和梅丽莎怎么样了?
You don't wanna know.
你不想知道的
Oh, come on.
拜托了
All right. I met her mom,saw a photo of mom's vagina,
好吧 我见了她的妈妈 还有 她妈妈的阴♥道♥照片
and chose to leave before being introduced to the real thing.
然后决定在见到"实物"之前离开
You're right,I didn't wanna know.
你说得对 我不想知道
Where are you going?
你又去哪里?
I'm a 40-year-old guy who recently...
我是一个40岁的男人 最近...
Ah, screw it.I'm gonna go play with myself.
算了 我要去自♥慰♥
Okay,thatI didn't want to know.
我可不想知道
Still not a bad idea.
不算个坏主意
好汉两个半（2003）
Two and a Half Men
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