好汉两个半（2003）

Two and a Half Men S06E07

Part 2 Nov. 18, 2020, 9:10 a.m.

Well, good. I'm, uh... I'm glad we're on the same page.
呃好的我..真高兴我们想的一样
Oh, hot. I told you it was hot.
哦烫啊告诉过你了啊
Hot! Hot! Hot! Have some more wine.
烫! 烫! 烫! 再喝点酒吧
That's better. That's better. I'll get your spoon.
好点了好点了我帮你捡勺子
Oh, God. pudding!
哦天布丁!
So when the moment's right, and she's ready, you'll be ready, too.
当火候到了她准备好了你也准备好了
Side effects may include, nausea, headaches, dry mouth, blurred vision,
副作用包括: 恶心头痛口干视力模糊
dizziness, anal leakage, kidney failure and massive stroke.
眩晕脱肛肾功能失常重度脑中风
She'd better be ready to call an ambulance.
她最好准备好叫救护车了
Is Jake asleep?
杰克睡着了么?
Probably not.
可能没吧
After dinner,
吃完晚饭
I made him watch Full Metal Jacket and Deerhunter.
我让他看了"全金属外壳"和"猎鹿人" 注:两部电影的内容都是关于虐待新兵
Oh, Charlie.
哦查理
And how was your evening?
晚上过的如何啊?
Oh, it was really a lot of fun.
哦还挺有意思的
You know, I'd forgotten how nice she can be.
我都忘了她有多好了
Judith?
朱迪丝?
Who else would I be talking about?
我还能在说谁啊?
I don't know. Somebody actually nice.
我不知道真正好的某个人吧
What was the name of Jimmy Carter's wife?
Jimmy Carter妻子叫啥来着? 注:Jimmy Carter为美国第39任总统
Rosalynn?
Rosalynn?
She was nice.
她就很不错
I always got a good vibe off her.
我对她一直很有感觉
Are you drunk?
你喝醉了?
Define drunk.
要看怎么才叫"喝醉"
Would you rather I talk to you in the morning?
要不明早咱俩再聊?
No, no. The liquor makes you more interesting. Go on.
不不酒精让我觉得你更有意思了继续
Judith's changed, Charlie.
朱迪丝变了查理
She's-She's a different woman.
她...她变得不一样了
Different than the one who threw you out of your house
和那个把你赶出家门
with your nuts in a to-go bag?
让你蛋蛋打包带走的女人不一样了?
That's a little graphic, don't you think?
描绘得很生动啊你不觉得么?
I'm an artist, Alan.
我就是玩艺术的艾伦
I paint with words.
我用文字来作画
You're a lush, Charlie. You paint with vomit.
你是个酒鬼查理你用呕吐物来作画
My point is that Judith has become a warm, nurturing woman.
我想说的是朱迪丝变成了个热心的居家型女人
You nailed her again, didn't you?
你又上了她是吧?
No, no, no, it was just, just the one time.
不不不那次是一次性的
Tonight, we did not have sex. Technically.
我们今天没上♥床♥ 准确的说
Really? Judith?
真的? 朱迪丝?
I know. I had to keep peeking to make sure it was her.
我知道我不得不偷瞄下来确定(下面的)是她
Well, congratulations. So when are you gonna move back in?
那祝贺你哦那你什么时搬回去啊?
Ah, we're not quite there yet.
啊还没到那个地步哦
Oh, come on, why wait?
哦得了吧还等什么啊?
We could load up the car and drive over there tonight.
我们可以把行李装车今晚就开过去啊
You promised if I shaped up, I wouldn't have to go!
你答应我如果我表现好就不用去军校的!
Aren't you starting to feel a little guilty about misleading him?
你就没为误导他觉得有点愧疚么?
Yeah, I guess.
嗯也许吧
Tell you what.
告诉你说吧
After he finishes cleaning the deck tomorrow, let's really send him to military school.
等他明天清理完露台咱就真把他送军校去得了
How's it going?
干得怎么样了?
I'm almost done.
差不多快完了
What about the railing?
扶手呢?
It's getting dark. I won't finish in time.
天黑了我♥干♥不完了
No problem. I'll give you a hand.
没关系我帮你
Gee, thanks.
哇谢谢
You backtalkin' me, soldier? No.
你顶嘴大兵? 没
No what? No way?
没什么? 没..门?
No, sir. Right. No, sir.
没长官对了没长官
That's better.
乖啦
I don't know, what I've been told Screwin' with jughead never gets old.
我不知道啥叫不合适嘲笑傻帽永远不过时
Okay, don't wait up.
好了不用等门啦
Hey, Alan, the chimney's a little blocked up with leaves and crap,
嘿艾伦烟囱都被树叶和鸟屎给堵住了
and I thought, maybe if I tied a rope around the kid,
我琢磨着把你家小孩用绳子拴住
I could lower him down into it...
然后放到烟囱里面...
Charlie, that borders on child abuse.
查理你这可以算是虐待儿童了
So, it's okay?
行不行吧?
Around his waist, not his neck. Good night, Jake.
绑在腰上面别拴着脖子就成晚安杰克
Good night, Dad. I love you.
晚安爸爸我爱你
Oh, Herb, hi.
噢哈珀嗨
Hey, Alan, Charlie. Hey, Herb. What's up?
嘿艾伦查理嘿哈珀有何贵干?
Well, I was just on my way down to The Sand Dollar.
我要去Sand Dollar
I thought maybe you and Alan would like to join me.
就想你要不要跟我一起去呢
It's ladies night.
今晚是女士疯狂夜
What do you say, Alan?
你去不去呢艾伦?
You can get in for half price.
你进去估计算半价
Plus, all-you-can-eat popcorn shrimp.
另外你还可以吃劲爆虾米花
Just keeps getting better, huh?
哟好像条件越来越优厚了哇?
No, I-I-I... I have other plans.
算了我我我... 我有约了
Got a date?
约会?
Yeah, Alan. You got a date?
哟艾伦是要去约会?
No. A date? Not likely. No, I have a-a-a...
不是约会? 不算啦我是要跟...
a meeting with the, uh, the-the-the thing about the...
某人开一个某会...
about the group. I told you. Remember?
某个社团我跟你说过了的记得不?
No. Tell me again.
忘了再说一次咧
He's a little pickled.
估计喝高了
Uh, well, if you must know, uh, uh, I-I-I-I belong to a...
如果你非要我说那我就告诉你...
a book club that I am going to.
我今晚上是要去读书会
Oh, that's right.
哟是嘛
What book are you reading again?
你读的是啥书来着?
It's... it's a mystery, uh,
是... 是关于神秘事件的书
called Why Are You Doing This To Me?
书名叫做 "你干嘛老找我的茬儿"?
Oh, yeah,
哦想起来了
it's by the same guy who wrote Because It Amuses Me.
不就是那个 "因为我高兴"的作者写的嘛
Boy, I wouldn't havead you two pegged as readers.
伙计你俩读的都是啥乱七八糟的书呀
Well, there you go. Good night.
可不是嘛晚安
Hey, Alan? Yeah?
嘿艾伦? 啥事?
You talk much to Judith these days? Nope, see you.
你最近有没有跟朱迪丝说过话? 没有再见
Oh, well, if you speak to her, tell her I say hi.
噢如果你有跟她说话就帮我带个好
Okay.
没问题
And that the time we spent together is very special to me,
我们在一起的那些时光对我来说意义非凡
and if she needs anything, uh, just call me.
如果她需要帮助随时找我
I'm there.
我等着她
You know what's a good book?
你知道啥才是好书不?
Under the Dining Room Table by Richard Gobbler.
Richard Gobbler写的"餐桌之下"
But... but it does not compare to Wait Till Your Liver Fails by Hope Udai.
但是... 跟Hope Udai写的 "你就等着酒精肝吧"根本没法比注:Hope Udai音同"你去死吧"
Well, what do you say, Charlie, huh? Me and you?
现在你去不查理? 就咱俩?
Go down to the Sand Dollar, have a few drinks.
一起去Sand Dollar 喝杯酒
Who knows, maybe we'll meet a couple of nice gals.
说不定我们交好运就能遇上几个靓妹
Sure, why not?
好吧去就去咯?
And if the pickings are slim,
如果找不到姑娘
you could always wrangle up some of your prostitute friends.
你还可以帮我跟你的妓♥女♥朋友们讲讲价
Oh, boy. Prostitutes and popcorn shrimp.
哦哟妓♥女♥外加劲爆虾米花
All you can eat.
两样都可以吃
Okay, Herb, let me explain to you something about hookers.
好了哈珀我来给你普及一下妓♥女♥知识
Oh, man. Who's been feeding the seagulls blueberries?
我靠谁这么无聊还给海鸥喂蓝莓?
Here you go.
上菜啦
Oh, cr me br le. Yummy.
哦等死我了美味呀
Oops, I dropped my spoon.
哦哟我的勺子掉了
Um, you know, I... I ran into Herb today.
呃今天我...遇到哈珀了
What?
什么?
He came by the house.
他路过我家
Why would he come by your house?
他去你家干嘛?
I just think he's lonely. He misses you.
我觉得他有点孤独他想你了
Well, too bad.
该让他想去
So, you don't miss him?
那你就不想他?
Ow, ow, Alan! Are we gonna spend all night talking
哦哦艾伦!你是想花一晚上说
about Herb or do you want me to get my spoon?
哈珀的事还是想要我去捡汤匙?
Well, if you're gonna bark at me, there's really no point in you getting your spoon.
如果你要继续冲我吼你就别找勺子了