好汉两个半（2003）
Two and a Half Men S06E04
Part 1
Nov. 18, 2020, 9:10 a.m.
I really appreciate you getting up so early and driving me to work.
你能起这么早专门送我上班 我真是太感激了
I owe you one.
就算我欠你一人情好了
You owed me one when I didn't smother you in your crib.
我没有把你闷死在床上 你就已经欠我一人情了
Well, then, I owe you two.
那就欠两个好了
My car will be out of the shop in a couple of days.
过几天我的车就应该修好了的
There was a terrible knock in the engine. Like a... like a...
引擎总发出那种可怕的敲门声 就跟...就跟...
I kept saying, "Come in," but nobody did.
我不停的说 "请进" 但是没人回应
Ooh, carpool lane--that's us. We could...
唷 拼车专用道 我们现在算是拼车 快过去...
Shut up. Right.
闭嘴 好吧
It's 7:00. Where are all these damn people going?
现在才7点 这些家伙都要上哪儿呀?
I know, right? I deal with that every day. Very frustrating.
可不是嘛 我每天都是这么过来的 烦都烦死了
Sometimes I dream about buying
有时 我梦想着在森林里买♥♥一个
a cabin in the woods and just getting away...
小木屋 远离这些...
I said shut up. Yes, you did.
我说了 闭嘴 好的 记住了
The people going that way should just switch jobs with the people going this way,
去那边上班的人应该跟 来这边上班的人换一换工作
and everybody can leave their freaking cars in the garage.
这样大家都可以走路去上班了
You know, that's a... that's a hell of an idea. Right on.
这还真是...一个超绝的主意 一语中的
Don't patronize me. Sorry.
别以为我不知道你是啥意思 我不说了
Wait a minute. How are you getting back to Malibu?
等等 你要怎么回马里布?
Uh, I... I was, uh...
呃 我...我 呃...
I was hoping...Charlie. No.
我是希望...查理 没门儿
Take the bus.
坐公车去
There's no bus from Tarzana to Malibu.
没有从圣弗南度谷到马里布的直达公车
Then, take a series of buses.
那就换乘
And don't get stuck on having to end up in Malibu.
一直朝着马里布的方向坐就行了
Charlie, come on. It... it's just for a couple of days.
查理 行行好吧 也...也就是几天
That's what Mom said when she brought you home from the hospital.
老妈把你从医院带回家的时候 就是这么跟我说的
Good one.
说得好
You're a very funny man, Ollie.
你说话真风趣 奥利
You certainly are.
相当风趣
It's Laurel and Hardy.
这是劳莱与哈代里的台词 注:世界喜剧电影史上最出名的二人组合
Boy, they used to...
那个呀 他们总是穿着...
they used to get in some wacky jams, huh?
总是穿着那种怪怪的衣服出场哈?
What about, uh... uh,
那么 那么...呃
Abbott and Costello?
雅培和科斯特洛 你总听说过吧? 注:类似的双人秀
"Hey, Abbott!"
"嘿 雅培!"
Or, uh... or, uh, Martin and Lewis?
那个 呃...那个 马丁和刘易斯 你肯定知道吧?
"Hey, lady, with the flavin' and the mavin' and the wow."
"Hey, lady, with the flavin' and the mavin' and the wow."
Three Stooges? "Nyuck, nyuck, nyuck, nyuck."
活宝三人组呢? "Nyuck, nyuck, nyuck, nyuck."
Whoa, what... why are we stopping?
喔 干嘛...干嘛停车了?
Oh, a wise guy...
噢 一个明事理的人...
Okay, I don't mind the good-natured brotherly punching,
好了 兄弟间善意地打打闹闹无所谓
but you did not have to twist my nipples.
但是你不应该拽我的乳♥头♥
You're lucky I didn't rip them off and feed them to you.
我没把它们拽下来 塞进你嘴里 都是你命好了
Um, you know, if you...
唔 如果你...
if you really have to go to the bathroom, there's, uh...
如果你要去上厕所 厕所就在...
there's one right down the hallway.
走廊尽头就有一个
What's wrong with the one in your office?
你办公室里的那个不能用?
Uh, it's not really for guests.
这个不是随便给客人用的
Neither is my house.
我房♥子也不是随便住的
Um, you know, I think we're out of paper towels.
呃 我记得好像没有厕纸了
I'll wipe my hands on you. Get out of the way.
那我就往你身上擦 别挡道
Morning, Dr. Harper.
早上好 哈珀医生
Morning, Melissa.
早上好 梅丽莎
Hello, Melissa.
你好 梅丽莎
You rat bastard.
差点就被你骗了
Two And A Half Men Season06 Episode04
好汉两个半:第六季第4集
The bathroom is down the hallway on the right.
厕所就在走廊尽头的右边
Good to know.
懒得理你
Hi, I'm Charlie, Alan's brother.
嗨 我是查理 艾伦的哥哥
Nice to meet you. Nice to meet you, too.
见到你很高兴 见到你 我也很高兴
Thought you had to tinkle.
我还以为你尿急呢
Go away.
滚蛋
So, how long you been working for my baby brother?
你为我弟弟工作多久了?
About six months.
差不多6个月了
Wow, he's been keeping you a secret for six months?
挖无 他都把你藏了6个月了?
Charlie, can I talk to you for a minute?
查理 能跟你说句话不?
There's no reason to thank me for the ride again, Alan.
没必要再为我送你来而感谢我了 艾伦
Mi Mercedes, su Mercedes.
我的大奔就是你的大奔
It's what brothers do when one is vastly more fortunate than the other.
哥哥比弟弟有钱嘛 这是我应该做的啦
Seriously, we need to talk.
我是认真的 我们得谈谈
Excuse us.
失陪一下
Charlie, she is the best receptionist I have ever had.
查理 她是我雇到的最棒的 一个接待员
I'm hoping to say the same.
我也是这么想的
Come on, Charlie, please do not crap where I work.
行行好吧 查理 别在我上班的地方给我添乱了
Hey, you crap where I live.
嘿 你还在我住的地方拉屎呢
So tell me about her.
跟我介绍一下她
There's nothing to tell. She's a... she's a terrific employee.
没啥可说的...她是 她是一个绝佳的雇员
She does my scheduling, my books. My patients love her.
她帮我安排时间表 整理书籍 我的病人都爱死她了
She keeps the whole operation running like clockwork,
她使这间诊所顺利按时运作 就跟闹钟发条一样
and she does it all for crappy pay and no benefits.
干了这么多活儿 要的工资却很少 还没要津贴
So you're not hitting that?
那么你没有搞过她了?
No, I'm not hitting that.
没 我没搞过
And even if I were hitting that, I wouldn't use the phrase, "hitting that."
而且就算我搞过她 我也不会用 "搞她"这个词
It's a violent image for a beautiful act.
你这是用一个暴♥力♥词汇 来形容一个美妙行为
Yeah, yeah... so the coast is clear?
是了是了... 这么说 你没上过她咯?
No, the coast is not clear.
不是 海边一点都不干净
The coast is foggy and strewn with dangerously pointy rocks.
海边总是雾蒙蒙的 到处都是尖尖的石头
Can I get either of you a cup of coffee?
你俩要来杯咖啡不?
Sure. No.
好呀 不用了
No for both of us. Please leave.
我们俩都不要了 你快走吧
All right.
好吧
Bye, Melissa. Bye, Charlie.
拜拜 梅丽莎 拜拜 查理
Hope I see you again.
真希望能再见到你
Oh, you'll see me tonight when I come back to pick up your boss.
噢 我晚上来接你们头儿的时候 你就能见到我了
Oh, oh, no, Charlie, Charlie,
噢噢 不用了 查理 查理
you don't have to make that long drive. I'll take the bus.
这么大老远的就不麻烦你了 我坐公车
I thought there were no buses.
我还以为没有直达公车呢
If I have to, I'll charter one.
如果有必要 我就增设一个专线
Why don't I just give you a ride home?
我送你回家怎么样?
Oh, that is so sweet of you.
噢 你真是太贴心了
You got a real gem here, Alan.
你这金屋里还真藏着娇呢 艾伦
Tell you what, when you get him home,
当你送他到家 在我阳台上
there will be a cold margarita waiting for you out on my deck.
会有一杯冰镇玛格丽塔留给你
Which overlooks the ocean. On the beach. In Malibu.
一间在马里布的海景洋♥房♥♥
That sounds wonderful.
听起来很不错
It's really not: it's chilly, damp, and covered with pelican poop.
其实不是的 那里又冷又潮 到处都是鹈鹕的便便
That's why he'll never win the Malibu slogan contest.
这就是他从来都没有赢过 马里布标语竞赛的原因
See you tonight, Melissa.
今晚见 梅丽莎
Bye, Charlie.
拜拜 查理
Have a great day, bro.
祝你工作顺利 弟弟
I hate you. I hate you, too.
我恨你 我也恨你
Gee, your brother is really cute.
神呀 你哥哥真的好帅耶
As a bug.
就会捣乱
Bathroom?
厕所在哪里?
Oh, let me give you the key.
噢 我把钥匙给你吧
Thank you.
谢谢
You're very welcome.
不用谢
You are a doll.
你真好
You are cute.
你真帅
She's actually a doll.
她还真是个洋娃娃
I wonder if she's anatomically correct.
我真想知道她有没有人类女子该有的东西
Who's the Smurf?
那个蓝精灵是谁?
The Smurf is my receptionist.
那个蓝精灵是我的接待员
You're letting Charlie hit that?
你就让查理搞她?
Okay, look, first of all, that is a very ugly phrase.
好了 我要说 首先 这个词真的是相当的不雅
And second of all, I'm not letting him.
其次 不是我让
I mean, short of drugging him
我是说 除了给他下药
and dumping him in the woods, what can I do?
然后丢到树林子里 我还能怎么做?
Yeah. He is like an Alabama bloodhound once he gets a whiff.
恩 他鼻子喷气的时候就跟一个 阿♥拉♥巴马警犬一样
好汉两个半（2003）
Two and a Half Men
剧集 | 好汉两个半（2003） | 导航列表