海绵宝宝（1999）

SpongeBob SquarePants S02E17

Part 4 Jan. 12, 2024, 10:45 a.m.

我准备好了
I'm ready
把邻居全逼疯了
He drives all the neighbors crazy
先前有一天
Why, just the other day
我们邻居章鱼哥
our neighbor Squidward was
他根本没救了
There's really no help for him
你们看他的衣着
I mean, look at the way he's dressed
只有脑袋钻了洞的
Only somebody with holes drilled in their head
才会这么穿
would wear that stuff
还有这形状怎么说
And how about this shape?
我听说过胸肌发达
I mean, I've heard of barrel-chested
可没听说过胸肌发方
but never box-chested
海绵宝宝
Hey, Spongebob
我能不能找你借睫毛膏
do you have any mascara I could borrow?
那男孩子还化妆
The boy wears makeup?
太好笑了
What a card
派大星
Hey, Patrick
派大星
Patrick
他喊了我名字
He said my name
你怎么把他训到那种程度的
How'd you train him to do that?
他咬我
He bit me
派大星来厨房♥找我
Patrick, meet me in the kitchen
笨蛋大概是想找我私下聊聊了
I guess the dummy wants to have a private conversation
聊的是笨话
A dumb one
请问有什么问题
So, what's on your mind?
不对等下
No, wait
我已经知道你什么问题了
I already know the answer
没头脑
nothing
看吧可好笑了
See, that's funny
因为你就是笨死了
'cause you're dumb
派大星能不能尽量少侮辱我一点
Patrick, could you
let up on the insults just a little bit?
刚刚那些给你整不会了吗
We're those too complicated for you?
我尽量试试傻瓜化一点
I'll try dumbing them down a bit
派大星我感觉你真觉得我笨了
Patrick, I get the feeling that
you think I really am dumb
我和笨蛋在一起
我就等你这么说
That's just what I'd expect you to say
笨蛋就是完全不会发现
Dumb people are always blissfully unaware
自己有多笨
of how dumb they really are
我这只是在装笨
I'm only pretending to be dumb
这可是我们计划记得吗
It was our plan, remember?
海绵宝宝要是你能看出来
Oh, Spongebob, if only you could see
你说的话有多笨就好了
how stupid you sound right now
还非得高谈阔论幻想出来的计划
with your talk of imaginary plans
跟你说吧你让我心情特别好
Tell you what, you've caught me in a good mood
就顺从你一下吧
I'll humor you
去吧
Go on
快出去给大家表现聪明点
Go out there and act smart for everyone
好可以
Okay, I will
你放心好了
And-and don't worry
我会帮你捂热的
I'll keep this warm for you
我摊牌了
I have a confession to make
刚刚做的傻事都是骗你们的
I lied about being stupid
我只是在装傻
I just acted like a fool
这样你们才能再稍微多重视派大星
so you would appreciate Patrick a little bit more
我会说话会吃饭
I know how to talk and eat
还会洗衣服
and do laundry--
我还分得清黑白
I even separate the darks and the lights
那我们就从头来过吧
So what do you say we start over and try again
嗨
Hi
我叫海绵宝宝
My name is Spongebob Squarepants
而且我不笨
and I am not a dummy
太神了
Amazing
在厨房♥待上个三分钟
Three minutes in the kitchen
我们儿子就教会他
and our son has taught him
用完整的句子说话了
to talk in complete sentences
好样的儿子
Good work, son
这趟不容易爸
It wasn't easy, Dad
可可可
B-but-but
看来你现在又得上说话课了年轻人
It looks like it's time for your next lesson, young man
都听好了
Now listen to me
我不笨
I'm not dumb
我有大脑
I have a brain
看这是照片
See, here's a picture of it
想必本来就那么大吧
That must be actual size
不对
No
我大脑大小正常功能也正常
It's normal size and fully functional
看好了
Watch
二加二等于四
Two plus two equals four
儿子你还教了他数学
Oh, son, you taught him math, too
不对
No
你还教了他唱歌♥
And you taught him to sing
现在他短路了
Now he's short-circuiting
一定是你把他教过头了
You must've taught him a little too much
儿子你要知道
You know, son
我心里一直清楚你的智力
I've always known that when it comes to brightness
也就跟三瓦灯泡的亮度差不多
well, you're about a three-watt
但是这位
But this guy
他就是漆黑洞穴里点不着的湿火柴
he's a wet match in a dark cave
显得接线员都比他聪明
He makes phone operators seem smart
儿子不过更重要的是
But more importantly, son
他让我明白了
he's shown me
你现在变得有多聪明
what a sharp, quick-witted boy you've become
感觉现在我才算是真正认识了你
I-I feel like I'm really meeting you for the first time
你说对吧珍妮特
Isn't that right, Janet?
那当然了马蒂
You bet, Marty
珍妮特
Janet?
马蒂
Marty?
你们都是谁啊
Who are you people?
马蒂我好怕
Marty, I'm scared
不好意思
Excuse me
这可爱的夫妇俩是你家的吗
Does this lovely couple belong to you?
他们站在我家外面喊
They've been standing outside my house saying
派大星在哪已经一整天了
"Where's Patrick?" all day
快让我烦死了
It's driving me nuts
妈
Mom
爸
Dad
儿子你这次认得我们了
Son, you actually recognized us this time
而且你今天还记得穿衣服
And you remembered to get dressed today
对了亲爱的
That's right, honey
我们没生儿子
we don't have a son
没错
Oh, yeah