宋飞正传（1990）

Seinfeld S03E06

Part 3 Dec. 8, 2021, 10:47 a.m.

Today my parents are celebrating...
他们的50周年… 哦，我说多了
...their 50th... Well, I'm jumping ahead here.
他们的47周年结婚纪念日
Their 47th wedding anniversary.
我们计划今晚一起渡过
And we made plans to spend the evening together.
他们6:15在我家楼前和我会面
They're meeting me in front of my building at 6:15.
就此而言，我还没告诉你…
What I haven't told you...
或其他人的是…
...or anyone else, for that matter...
我爸在赤色中国的监狱
...is that my father's been in a Red Chinese prison...
已经关了14年
...for the past 14 years.
我的意思是那家伙崇拜肥胖
I mean, the guy had a fat fetish.
检查员从不和250磅以下的女人约会
The inspector never dated a woman under 250 pounds.
真的吗？ - 他能对那堆肥肉做什么呢？
Really. -What did he do with all that fat?
他就在上面跳上跳下吗？
Does he just jump up and down on it?
或者他像科勒·科瓦尔斯基在上面挖洞？
Or does he gouge it like Killer Kowalski?
科勒·科瓦尔斯基是谁？ - 一名摔跤运动员
Who's Killer Kowalski? -He was a wrestler.
他会屈膝下跪
He would get down on his knees...
然后抓住对手的腹部
...and he'd grab ahold of someone's stomach...
接着拼命挤压直到他们精疲力竭
...and squeeze it till they gave.
嘿，嘿，嘿我得去一趟卫生间
Hey, hey, hey. I have to go to the bathroom.
那你还不赶紧？
Why don't you just go.
什么，这里？
What, here?
你和杰瑞，都…
You and Jerry. It's...
好
Okay.
好，我准备沿着这排过去
All right, I'm gonna go down this row.
怎么了？我做什么了？我什么都没做
What? What did I do? I didn't do anything.
克莱默！克莱默！
Kramer! Kramer!
什么？难道你不相信我？今天是他们47周年结婚纪念日
What? Don't you believe me? It's their 47th anniversary.
你知道的，这将会急死他们
You know, this is gonna kill them.
你没有意识到吗？急死他们
You're aware of that? Kill them.
在他们这辈子最伟大的夜晚
On the biggest night of their life.
你兄弟今天也遇上结婚周年纪念日？
Your folks have an anniversary today too?
你父亲也在赤色中国的监狱里？
Was your father also in a Red Chinese prison?
赤色中国的监狱？
Red Chinese prison?
乔治！
George!
杰瑞！
Jerry!
杰瑞！
Jerry!
你知道当你和某人一起走路的时候
You know when you're walking with someone...
你是假定他们知道车停在哪儿的
...and you assume that they know where the car is?
直到你看到他们做这个动作一旦他们这样做
And you're fine until you see them do this move. Once they do this:
当他们回头看他们来的地方时
When they look back from where they came from...
不，你现在情况不妙
No, you're in bad shape now.
人们不知道何去何从时就这么做
Nobody that knows where they're going does that.
飞机上的飞行员不会打开座舱门说：
Pilots on planes don't open the cockpit door and go:
哦，实际情况是…
Well, what happened was...
我父亲和一位中国伟大军官…
...my father was staying with one of China's great military leaders...
张将军在一起顺边提一下就是我父亲给张将军提供了做♥鸡♥秘方
...General Chang, who, by the way, came up with the recipe...
你知道四川菜园里的红辣椒和桔子皮吗？
...for General Chang's chicken. The one with red pepper and orange peel...
我一直都在吃，辣得很刺♥激♥
...at Szechwan Gardens? -I eat it all the time. Spicy.
显然张将军是个浮夸的人
Apparently, General Chang is a flamboyant man.
当将军完全是失败但做厨师不错
Complete failure as a general, but a hell of a cook.
看看
Look at this.
看看，你看见了吗？
Look at this. Will you look at this?
有奔驰他还嫌不够他要占两个停车位
He doesn't have enough with the Mercedes, he has to have two spaces.
我跟你讲，你知道我想干嘛吗？我想朝上面吐口水
I tell you, you know what I'd like to do? I'd like to spit on it.
我倒想看看
I would like to see that.
我应该吗？我应该这么做吗？ - 给他上一节永生难忘的课
Should I? Should I do it? -Teach him a lesson he'll never forget.
他以为他是谁？ - 必须有人去阻止他
Who does he think he is? -Someone's gotta stop him.
这违法，对不对？ - 哦，当然算是
It's against the law, isn't it? -Well, it certainly should be.
好
Okay.
真是部好车
This is some machine.
留给德国人去吧
Leave it to the Germans.
我问你个事
Let me ask you something.
这车是怎么预热的？
What do they get for a tune-up on this?
杰瑞！ - 伊莲！
Jerry! -Elaine!
你去哪儿了？
Where have you been?
我因撒尿被逮了 - 我也是
I was arrested for urinating. -Me too.
你们怎么？ - 我患有“憋尿症”
You what? -I have uromysitisis.
这很严重，你知道的
It's very serious, you know.
杰瑞，看我的鱼
Jerry, look at my fish.
他…？ - 不，但是他看起来不太好
Is he...? -No, but he's not looking good.
求求你们，我们找不到我们的车了
Please. We can't find our car.
求求你们，就开车带我们到停车♥库♥周围找找我们的车吧
Please, just drive us around the parking lot to find our car.
我的鱼就要死了 - 对不起，不行
My fish are dying. -Sorry. Can't do it.
我能理解你们不在乎我们我们是人类
I can see not caring what happens to us. We're human.
但是鱼怎么办？鱼？
But what about the fish? The fish?
对不起
Sorry.
就这样吧，去吧！
That's right, go.
回家练你的哑铃去
Go home to your dumbbells.
去练你们的胸肌和背肌吧真让我们大家印象深刻
Go work on your pecs and your lats. We're all really impressed.
哦，没错，你们听到了
Yeah, that's right. You heard me.
你对此有问题吗？ - 伊莲，别说了
You got a problem with that? -Elaine, shut up.
别担心，我带枪了
Don't worry, I'm packing heat.
嘿，嘿，克莱默在哪儿？
Hey, hey. Where's Kramer?
我不知道 - 我原以为他跟你在一起
I don't know. -I thought he was with you.
哦，看到没？看到没？我早就知道会发生这种事情
Oh, see? See? I knew this was gonna happen.
看看时间，好吧，只能这样了
Look at the time. All right, that's it.
我们看过那边了吗？我们检查那边了吗？
Did we look over there? We check that side?
我们从那边进来的 - 我们不是从那边进来的
We came in over there. -We didn't come in over there.
克莱默在哪儿？ - 看看这些车
Where's Kramer? -Look at these cars...
它们看起来几乎都一个样
...they all look exactly alike.
熏死了
The fumes.
我没法呼吸
I can't breathe.
我有呼吸障碍了
I'm having trouble breathing.
嘿，乔治，又是她
Hey, George, there she is again.
你在干嘛？你想害死我啊
What are you doing? You're killing me.
请她开车带我们绕绕这是你的好机会
Ask her to drive us around. There's your opening.
确实是个好机会
That is an opening.
你好，我真的是…
Excuse me. I'm really...
瞧，事情是…
See, what happened...
我朋友忘记他把车停哪儿了… - 好，我开车带你们绕绕
...my friend forgot where he parked... -Sure, I'll drive you around.
你会吗？ - 当然
You will? -Sure.
谢谢，谢谢
Thank you. Thank you.
我们迟到了而我父母正在等我我们却困在这儿
We're late and my parents are waiting for me and we're stuck here.
我可不希望在这迷路闻起来像个厕所
Well, I wouldn't wanna get lost in here. It smells like a toilet.
有些人跟畜生一样 - 可不是吗
People are such animals. -You're telling me.
臭猪
Filthy pigs.
是辆棕色的福特
It's a brown Ford.
我也遇到过这种事非常令人沮丧
This has happened to me too. It's very frustrating.
我求过好几个人他们甚至都不搭理我
I've asked several people. They wouldn't even answer me.
我乐意帮忙
I'm happy to do it.
我叫米歇尔
I'm Michele.
嗨，米歇尔，我叫乔治
Hi, Michele. I'm George.
出去！ - 但我说这话并没什么意思
Get out! -But I didn't mean anything by it.
我甚至都不知道L·罗恩·哈伯特我不知道你会是那一派的
I don't even know L. Ron Hubbard. I didn't know you were with that group.
我的鱼怎么办？
What about my fish?
伙计，这些基♥督♥教科学派教♥徒♥ 她们可真够敏感的
Boy, those Scientologists, they can be pretty sensitive.
我也觉得
I'll say.
这是什么？我们的车！
What is it? The car!
车！ - 车！
The car! -The car!
车！ - 真难以置信！
The car! -I can't believe it!
克莱默，克莱默不在这儿我早就知道
Kramer. Kramer's not here. I knew it.
我早就知道我早就知道会发生这种事
I knew it. I knew this would happen.
克莱默！克莱默！ - 克莱默！
Kramer! Kramer! -Kramer!
克莱默！
Kramer!
嘿，看
Hey, look.
伙计，我浪费了不少时间去找空调
Boy, I had a hell of a time finding that air conditioner.
我到处都找了，你知道吗？
You know I looked everywhere?
我完全不记得我把它藏哪儿了
I completely forgot where I hid it.
你知道它在哪儿吗？
You know where it was?
紫色23号♥ - 对，紫色23号♥
Purple 23. -Right. Purple 23.
我应该让你帮忙的