宋飞正传（1990）

Seinfeld S03E06

Part 2 Dec. 8, 2021, 10:47 a.m.

Don't you dare talk to me like that, you hear me?
我告诉过你，我不管你必须等着！
I told you, I don't care! You'll have to wait!
嘿，嘿，真有那个必要吗？
Hey, hey, is that really necessary?
你管好你自己的事就行了
Why don't you mind your own business.
哦，我认为打一个毫无抵抗力的孩子关我的事
Well, I think hitting a defenceless child is my business.
你很难看 - 什么？
You're ugly. -What?
你很难看 - 你才是
You're ugly. -You are.
你才是 - 那是你所想的
You are. -That's what you think.
那就是我所知道的
That's what I know.
我找到了！ - 他找到了！
I found it! -He's got it!
不是，搞错了 - 够了，这样
No, no, no. -All right, that's it.
从现在开始，别再喊“我找到了” 除非我们已经坐在车里了，行吗？
From now on, no more calling out "I found it" unless we're sitting in it.
杰瑞，看看我的鱼
Jerry, look at my fish.
他的眼睛看起来有点阴沉 - 看见了？
His eyes look a little cloudy. -See?
哦，那是你的眼睛
Oh, those are your eyes.
唉，他们肯定要狂怒了
Oh, they are gonna be furious.
谁拿着票？ - 我拿着
Who's got the tickets? -I do.
我还以为你对这个商店很熟
I thought you knew this mall.
你说过你来过这儿 - 上次比较容易
You said you'd been here. -It was easy last time.
好了，我的鱼就要死在我面前了
Okay, my fish are dying right in front of me.
我们必须找个人开车载我们到周围去找车
We've gotta get someone to drive us around to us help look for the car.
没有人会那么做
No one's gonna do that.
打扰了，嗨
Excuse me. Hi.
我们似乎找不到我们的车了我想知道你们能否…
We can't seem to find our car. I was wondering if it would be possible...
用5分钟载我们绕车♥库♥找找
...to drive us around the garage for five minutes so we can look.
对不起
Sorry.
就5分钟 - 不行
Just five minutes. -Can't do it.
我们又不是光头党
We're not skinheads.
打扰一下我似乎找不到我的车了
Excuse me. I can't seem to find my car.
你们能不能开车带我…
Do you think you could drive me...?
哦，这么好笑吗？真的好笑吗？
Oh, that's funny? Is that funny?
嘿，告诉我你们是否觉得这很好笑？
Hey, tell me if you think this is funny
这些鱼就要死了
These fish are dying.
再过一个小时它们就翻白肚了！
In an hour they'll be belly-up!
打扰一下 (该男子为本剧主编之一)
Excuse me.
嘿，抱歉打扰一下非常对不起
Hey, sorry to have disturbed you. Terribly sorry.
但这鱼马上就要死了！你肯定知道吧？
But the fish will be dead! You do know that?
它们在塑料里面没法活
They can't live in plastic.
那不是我说的，那是科学！
That's not me talking, that's science!
购物使我必须方便真让人惊讶
It's amazing how shopping makes me have to go.
我膀胱怎么会知道我在一个百货公♥司♥？
How does my bladder know I'm in a department store?
你为什么还不赶紧去？
Why don't you just go.
不，我不能
No, I can't.
你难道没有厌倦遵守规定吗？ - 你觉得我太谨小慎微？
Don't you get tired of following rules? -You think I'm too cautious?
如果你不是的话为什么会这么不舒服？
Why be uncomfortable if you don't have to?
这是人之本能 - 人之本能，巴迪·哈克特也这样
It's organic. -Organic. So is Buddy Hackett.
巴迪·哈克特？ - 他是个喜剧演员
Buddy Hackett? -He's a comedian.
我知道
I know.
好吧，好吧 - 嘿，你可以去那边
All right, all right. -Hey, you can go over here.
我能搞定
I can manage.
乔治！
George!
好，我们走 - 但…
Okay, let's go. -But...
快点
Come on.
克莱默
Kramer.
我告诉你我11岁就得了这种病
I'm telling you, I've had this condition since I was 11 years old.
我这一辈子都在医院里进进出出
I've been in and out of hospitals my whole life.
我没法控制
I have no control over it.
医生们告诉过我一旦我有尿意
Doctors have told me that when I feel it...
最好马上就撒
...the best thing to do is just release it.
否则…
Otherwise...
我就会死
...I could die.
你听到我在说什么吗？
Do you hear what I'm saying to you?
我是在告诉你如果我不方便我就会死
I'm telling you that if I don't go, I could die.
死！值得为这种事情而死吗？
Die! Is it worth dying for?
那取决于你 - 哦，看来你不在乎我的死活
That's up to you. -Oh, so you don't care if I die.
我在乎的只是停车场设施的卫生状况
What I care about is the sanitary condition of the parking facility.
如果不是处于致命危险中我会这么做吗？
Why would I do it unless I was in mortal danger?
我知道这违法了 - 我不知道
I know it's against the law. -I don't know.
因为我会患“憋尿症”中毒而死那就是为什么
Because I could get "uromysitisis" poisoning and die, that's why.
你以为我乐意像这样活着吗？
You think I enjoy living like this?
羞愧？侮辱？
The shame? The humiliation?
你知道吗，因为这种病
You know, I've been issued a public urination pass...
我获得了市里的公共场合撒尿许可证
...by the city because of my condition.
不幸的是，我弟弟今天早上拿着它从房♥间里跑了
Unfortunately, my little brother ran out of the house with it this morning.
他和他朋友们也许正到处撒尿呢
Him and his friends are probably peeing all over the place.
杰瑞！
Jerry!
杰瑞！
Jerry!
难以置信
Unbelievable.
我再也离不开这儿了
I'm never gonna get out of here.
这家伙去撒个尿就再也回不来了
Guy goes to pee, he never comes back.
像科幻小说中的情节
It's like a science-fiction story.
也许他去其他层了
Maybe he went to one of the other levels.
我要去找他 - 现在你就要去？
I'm gonna look for him. -Now you're gonna go?
五分钟后回来 - 如果你现在走了
Be back in five minutes. -Lf you go now...
要是我们找到车，杰瑞也出现了而我们就找不到你了！
...we'll find the car, Jerry will show up and we'll never find you!
我马上就回
I'll be right back.
有什么区别？我们最终都会死掉
What's the difference? We'll all be dead eventually.
让你很烦吗？
Does that bother you?
是的，很烦
Yeah, it bothers me.
你不烦吗？ - 一点儿也不
Doesn't it bother you? -Not at all.
现在，这甚至比死还烦人
Now, that bothers me even more than dying bothers me.
因为像你这样的人会活到120岁
Because people like you live to be 120...
因为你不会为此而烦恼
...because you're not bothered by it.
你怎么会不烦呢？
How can it not bother you?
哦，我曾经在电视上看过那些处于疾病晚期的人
Well, I once saw this thing on TV with people who are terminally ill.
他们中的每一个人都相信生命的奥秘…
Every one of them believed that the secret of life...
就是享受生命中的每一刻 (本剧我个人最喜欢的一句话)
...is just to live every moment.
是，我听说过
Yeah, I've heard that.
此时，我和你在泽西城的一个停车♥库♥里
Meanwhile, I'm here with you in a parking garage in Jersey.
夹克不错从哪儿弄的？
That's a nice jacket. Where'd you get that?
有个家伙把它丢在了我妈家里了
Some guy left it over at my mother's house.
首先，你还不知道表面上，我是在方便
First of all, you don't even know, technically, that I went.
这作为开始
That's for starters.
我的意思是我可能是把一瓶水倒在那儿
I mean, I could have been pouring a bottle of water out there.
我清楚你做了什么 - 哦，真的吗？你清楚？好…
I know what you did. -Oh, really? Do you? Well...
碰巧当时我正是在倒水
...it just so happens that I did pour water out.
我有一瓶温水然后我倒掉了
I had a bottle of very tepid water and I poured it out.
我明白你是怎么弄错的
I could see how you made a mistake...
因为倒水的声音和人撒尿的声音很像
...because pouring water out sounds very much like a person urinating.
而且，你知道当你回想时
And, you know, when you think about it...
这真是一个非常有趣的关于抓错人的案子
...it's really quite an amusing case of mistaken identity.
就是这么回事
And that's all it is.
现在他不见了我确定他正在找车
And now he's gone. I'm sure he's looking for the car.
5分钟就可以了我只是想找到他
Five minutes, that's all. I just wanna find him.
我帮不了你 - 但是为什么？为什么不行？
I can't do it. -But why? Why can't you do it?
不行
I can't.
“不行”不是个理由你只是不想
That's not a reason, "You can't." You just don't want to.
没错
That's right.
但是为什么？你为什么不想？
But why? Why don't you want to?
我不知道
I don't know.
你不会从帮助别人过程中获得一些满足感吗？
Well, wouldn't you get any satisfaction out of helping someone out?
不，我不会
No, I wouldn't.
好，好
All right. All right.
我…我要道歉
I... I want to apologize.
我害怕了
I was frightened.
我说了一些离谱的事情我明显冒犯了你
I said crazy things, I obviously offended you...
我侮辱了你的智商
...I insulted your intelligence.
“憋尿症”、水瓶…
The uromysitisis, the water bottle...
那都是我编的
...I made all that up.
现在我想告诉你真♥相♥
And now I'm gonna tell you the truth.
今天我父母正庆祝…