宋飞正传（1990）

Seinfeld S03E16

Part 3 Dec. 8, 2021, 10:49 a.m.

What? -He says the kitchen...
是整个家里最舒适的地方
...is the most sociable room in the house.
他是认真的
And he was serious.
那么进行得怎样？ - 能好到哪去？
So how was it? -How good could it be?
我的头在电炉上
My head was on a hot plate.
我有另一个电♥话♥ 一定是杰瑞
I got another call. Must be Jerry.
哦别跟他说这些 - 好的
Oh, don't you tell him any of this. -Yeah, okay.
喂？ - 她说了什么？
Hello? -So, what did she say?
他说了什么？ - 他说过得很愉快
What did he have to say? -He said he had a good time.
她也是 - 哦很好
Her too. -Oh, good.
还有别的吗？ - 没有
Anything else? -No.
你呢？ - 没有
You? -No.
你确定？ - 是啊
You sure? -Yeah.
你呢？ - 也是
You? -Yeah.
好吧那么…
All right, well...
我想一切都在计划中
I guess everything is under control.
是的好了
Yeah. Okay then.
好吧
Alrighty.
晚安 - 晚安
Good night. -Good night.
我留了三条信息真不能相信这个女人
I left three messages. I can't believe this woman.
她和我上了床十分钟之后就离开了然后我再也联♥系♥不到她
We have sex, she leaves 10 minutes later, then I never hear from her again.
什么样的人会这么做？
What kind of a person does this?
她利用了我我感到很丢脸而且被亵渎了
She used me. I feel cheap and violated.
我来想想办法 - 你要做什么？
I'm gonna do something about this. -What are you gonna do?
不用担心真可耻
Never mind. Disgraceful.
让你一人坐在厨房♥地板上像一种蟑螂诱饵
Leaves you sitting there on the kitchen floor like some kind of roach trap.
你好小姐谢谢再见（一句歌♥词）
Wham, bam, thank you, ma'am.
先生诸如此类的
Sir. Whatever.
她得受点惩罚
She's not gonna get away with this.
我正在绞尽脑汁地想我做了什么
I keep racking my brain to try to figure out what I did.
我既聪明又风趣
I was smart. I was funny.
我和服务生闲谈了几句…
I made great small talk with the waitress...
这样她就能知道我也会体恤平民
...so she could see I could relate to the commoners.
我是人♥民♥之子
I'm a man of the people.
我打电♥话♥给她 - 别打
I'm gonna call her. -Don't call.
不我要打 - 不杰瑞我不想你这么做
No, I'm calling her. -No, Jerry, I don't want you to.
离我远点 - 把电♥话♥给我
Get away from me. -Give me the phone.
你想和我打架？ - 杰瑞我会杀了你
You wanna fight me? -Jerry, I'm gonna kill you.
嘿嘿嘿！
Hey, hey, hey!
嘿行了杰瑞乔治住手
Hey, come on, Jerry, George. Stop it.
你离开后我就打电♥话♥给她
I'll just call her when you leave.
你不能打不关你的事！
It's none of your business!
和我有关！ - 电♥话♥给我！
It is so my business. -Give me that!
小子们停下来！
Stop it, boys!
我不想听见你们两人再多说一个字
I don't want another word from either of you.
告诉他… - 嘿嘿嘿！
Tell him... -Hey, hey, hey!
你们俩下一个开口讲话的人就由我对付
The next one of you that opens your mouth, you'll have to deal with me.
我打赌我知道是关于什么的和女人有关对不对？
I bet I know what this is about. It's about a woman, isn't it?
是的但是… - 瞧！
Yeah, but... -You see!
这就是她们想对你们做的
This is exactly what they want to do to you.
她们挑拨离间
They play one against the other.
你们不能中计
You can't let them manipulate you like that.
但是克莱默… - 不不不！
But, Kramer... -No, no, no!
我希望你们握手言和
I want you guys to shake hands.
好了外面有一大堆女人等着我们
Come on, there are plenty women out there for all of us.
握手
Shake.
好了！看见没？
Yes! You see?
这不是比打架更好？心怀怨恨？
Isn't that better than fighting? Animosity?
你想找人打架的话找我
You wanna fight with somebody, you fight with me.
顺便一提乔治我给你的那些避孕套它们是次品别用
By the way, those condoms I gave you? They're defective. Don't use them.
什么？ - 是的
What? -Yeah.
次品？ - 次品
Defective? -Defective.
你怎么能给我次品避孕套？
How could you give me a defective condom?
我不知道它们是次品
I didn't even know they were defective.
从没想过你会用它们 - 你什么意思…？！
Didn't think you'd use them. -What do you mean...?!
放松点
Take it easy.
给我分开！
Just spread out!
别担心如果出事了她会打电♥话♥给你
Don't worry. If anything was wrong, she'd have called you.
我没来例假
I missed my period.
哦天哪！
Oh, my God!
我很担心我的例假从没有推迟过
I am very worried. I am never late.
但他用了避孕套是不是？
But he used a condom, right?
我知道但这些东西并不是百分百可靠
I know, but these things aren't always foolproof.
哦不
Oh, no.
怎么了？
What?
是蓝色的吗？
Was it blue?
对你怎么知道？
Yeah. How'd you know?
直觉而已
Just a hunch.
上面写着“拧开” 拧开！拧！开！
It says "twist-off." Twist off! Twist! Off!
哦嗨汽水？
Oh, hi. Soda?
不谢谢
No, thanks.
那么告诉我
So tell me.
你那脾气古怪的朋友有问题吗？她为什么不回电♥话♥？
What's the problem with your little flaky friend? She doesn't return calls?
你凭什么这么说她？
Who are you to talk about her like that?
当她准备好了自然会打电♥话♥
She'll call him when she's good and ready.
你又不了解她 - 哦我了解
You don't even know her. -Oh, I know her.
我了解她这类人
I know her type.
她这类人？哪一类？
Her type? What type?
不回电♥话♥的一类
The type that doesn't return calls.
我早知道我们不会成功这主意本身就不好我告诉过你
I knew we shouldn't have done it. It was a bad idea. I told you.
你告诉过我？你把一切都推我身上
You told me? You pushed this whole thing on me.
这是你的主意
It was your idea.
我只是在帮助你那愤世嫉俗偏执的朋友
I was just helping your bitter, twisted friend.
她没有愤世嫉俗
She's not bitter.
好吧愤世嫉俗是主观判断但她很个古怪偏执的人
Bitter's a judgment call. She's twisted.
古怪偏执？天是我帮了你个忙！
Twisted? God, I did you a favour!
你说他们过得很愉快你对我隐瞒了什么？
You said they had a good time. What else are you keeping from me?
你说我是个骗子？ - 如果你是我就这么说
Are you calling me a liar? -I'm calling you one if you are.
你敢？ - 把你的手从我面前拿开
Are you? -Get your finger out of my face.
先把你的拿开 - 我才不在乎
Get yours out. -I don't care.
拿开！拿开！拿开！
Get out! Out! Out! Out!
嘿！嘿！嘿！停下！
Hey, hey, hey! Come on, stop it!
好了给我分开！
Come on. Break it up!
嘿嘿！
Hey, hey!
你们怎么了？
What's the matter with you?
难道你们不知道你们爱着对方的吗？
Now, don't you two see that you're in love with each other?
我是说为什么还不能面对这个事实？
I mean, why can't you face that already?
你们四处奔走寻找根本不存在的东西…
You're running around looking for something not even there...
而你们梦想的一切就在眼前
...when everything you dream of is right here in front of you.
现在你们为什么不承认呢？
Now why can't you admit that?
顺便一提遇见乔治的话把这些给他这些能用
By the way, when you see George, give him these. These'll work.
我就知道那些避孕套是次品！
I knew those condoms were defective!
你怎么会知道它们是次品？
How did you know they were defective?!
因为！因为她的例假没来！
Because! Because she missed her period!
她的例假没来？
She missed her period?
哦我的天！
Oh, my God!
我无法相信
I can't believe it.
我要当父亲了！我成功了！
I'm a father! I did it!
我的“子孙”能游泳！
My boys can swim!
我能做到！我能做到！我是个父亲了！
I can do it! I can do it! I'm a father!
然后他出现了上气不接下气衣衫凌乱
So he shows up. He's all out of breath. He's dishevelled.
告诉我无论发生什么无论我做什么决定都没关系…
And tells me that whatever happens, whatever I decide is fine with him...
我可以依赖他…
...and I could depend on him...
无论我需要什么他都会帮助我
...and that he'd support me in whatever way I need.
伊莲我都说不出话了
Elaine, I was speechless.
哇哦你瞧？你自以为了解某人
Wow. Wow. You see? You think you know somebody.
我和他说 “我真的很感激但是我的例假来了”
I said to him, " I really appreciate this, but I just got my period."
是啊 - 所以我请他来…
Yeah. -So I asked him to come in...
嗨 - 哦嗨
Hi. -Oh, hi.
对不起我们迟到了塞车太严重真抱歉
Sorry we're late. We got so hung up in traffic. I'm sorry.
出什么事了？ - 演戏