家有喜旺（2010）

Raising Hope S03E20

Part 2 Nov. 24, 2020, 1:12 p.m.

Hello, Rachel.
你好瑞秋
So, funny story:
很不凑巧
it turns out that my husband Jimmy is your old boyfriend.
我老公吉米原来是你前男友
Yeah. Oh, my God. It's-it's been so long.
对天啊好久不见
Yes, it has.
的确
Which is why I hope what I'm about to say
所以希望你听了下面的话
doesn't ruin your new friendship with Sabrina.
还能和塞布丽娜做朋友
Jimmy, what are you doing?
吉米你要干什么
Saying something that needs to be said.
说该说的话
When I wrote this seven years ago,
七年前我写下这个
I wanted to make sure that if I ever ran into you,
是为了日后遇见你时
you would know exactly how I felt when you dumped me.
让你清楚地知道我被你甩掉的感受
"I thought that everything was going to be great between us.
我原以为我们会是天作之合
Then, all of a sudden, it was gone.
结果突然之间什么都没了
If our relationship was a hit new movie,
如果把我们的恋情比作一部大热电影
it would be called Crash."
那就是《撞车》
Wh-When I wrote this, uh, seven years ago,
七年前我写下这个时
that movie had just won the Academy Award.
那部电影刚获得奥斯卡金像奖
Never saw it, but I heard it was good.
我没看过但听说不错
Uh, da-da-da-da, let me see,
还有还有我看看
a couple of Hurricane Katrina references.
那什么卡特里娜飓风
Uh... Osama Bin Laden is dead now,
本·拉♥登♥死了
so that doesn't work.
所以这些梗现在不能用了
This is really catching me off guard.
这也太突然了
I... I don't even know what to say. I mean...
不知道该说些什么
Well, I see you're still cozy with Lance and Sally.
看来你跟兰斯和萨莉的关系还是很好
I am so embarrassed.
太尴尬了
I have been calling them Burt and Virginia for like 30 years.
30年了我一直叫他们伯特和维吉妮亚
Oh, my God...
神啊
Wait a second.
等等
You know them?
你认识他们吗
Yeah, I know them.
对啊认识
They're the whole reason we broke up.
我们分手都是他们害的
Mom! Dad!
爸妈
Oh, look, Sally.
看啊萨莉
It's Rachel.
是瑞秋
I don't believe this!
不敢相信
Okay, let us explain.
听我们解释
It's not what you think.
不是你想的那样
Jimmy was interested in girls at a very young age.
吉米很小就开始对女生感兴趣
I'm gonna give this ring to that girl over there
我要把这枚戒指给那边的女孩
and ask her to be my girlfriend.
让她做我女朋友
Okay, good luck. Go get 'em, tiger.
好啊祝你好运搞定她小猛♥男♥
Excuse me?
打扰一下
The problem was Jimmy liked girls that were way out of his league.
问题是吉米喜欢白富美
I guess the urinal isn't the only place he aims too high.
估计他不只尿尿的时候好高骛远
And sure enough,
当然
once she realized there were smarter, richer guys out there,
一旦见识到高富帅
Jimmy was kicked to the curb.
吉米就没戏了
And we were left to pick up the pieces.
留下我们收拾残局
**Ain't no sunshine when she's gone*
*伊人离去阴雨绵绵
**It's not warm when she's away*
*伊人离去我心戚戚
**Ain't no sunshine when she's gone*
*伊人离去阴雨绵绵
**And she's always gone too long*
*何时归来
**Any time she goes away*
*遥遥无期
**Wonder this time where she's gone*
*这次她去向何方
**Wonder if she's gone to stay*
*此去还有无归期
**Ain't no sunshine when she's gone*
*伊人离去阴雨绵绵
**And this house just ain't no home*
*独守寂寞空房♥
**Any time she goes away*
*心伤无所依傍
**I know, I know, I know*
*我懂我懂我懂
Close your eyes.
闭上眼睛
**I know, I know, I know, I know*
*我懂我懂我懂
I finally got him to go to sleep.
终于让他睡下了
Poor little guy's heart is broken.
可怜的孩子心都碎了
Just broken.
碎了一地
Burt, I'm talking about our son.
伯特我在说我们儿子呢
How can you... Don't look at me.
你怎么... 别看我
Are you crying?
你哭了
His tiny heart is shattered.
他幼小的心灵碎成了渣渣
It's making me so sad.
我好伤心
So...
好...
...sad.
伤心
I know.
我懂
I hate this.
我讨厌这样
I hate being so sad.
我讨厌这么难过
We can't ever let this happen to us again.
我们不能再让这种事发生了
Promise? I...
你保证吗我...
I promise.
我保证
Knowing we couldn't take seeing Jimmy get his heart broken ever again,
我们不忍♥心再看吉米心碎
we made sure he stayed away from women that were out of his league.
所以我们要确保白富美都离他远远的
Mommy, this is Tracy.
妈咪她是特蕾西
She's really smart.
她好聪明
She helped me with my letters,
她辅♥导♥我学字母
and she taught me that boogers aren't food.
还告诉我鼻屎不能吃
Thanks for coming over.
谢谢你来
Most kids don't want to be friends with Jimmy.
大多数孩子都不愿和吉米交朋友
I don't know if it's because he has cooties
不知道是因为他身上有虱子
or because I'm a witch who eats children.
还是因为我是吃孩子的巫婆
And it didn't stop when Jimmy became a teenager.
这一直延续到吉米的青少年时代
Hello? Is Jimmy there?
你好吉米在吗
Oh, hi, Susan.
你好苏珊
You're the head cheerleader, right?
你啦啦队队长吧
That's great.
太棒了
What'd you get on your S.A.T.'s?
你高考多少分
Yeah, Jimmy can't come to the phone right now.
吉米现在没法接电♥话♥
He's in the bathroom taking his, um, worm medication.
他在浴室服驱虫药
His underwear looks like the sidewalk after it rains.
他的内♥裤♥像泥泞的人行道
Hello?
喂
What is wrong with that boy?
那熊孩子是怎么回事
Right down the block, there's that bucktoothed redhead
街区那头明明有个疯疯癫癫的
with the one Frankenstein shoe.
红发龅牙妹
She's perfect for him.
他俩天生一对
We thought he had learned to leave those types of girls alone.
我们以为他不会再招惹白富美了
But then Jimmy met Rachel,
结果吉米邂逅了瑞秋
and she sounded a little too good for our taste.
在我们看来她有点太好了
Me and Rachel are gonna work,
我和瑞秋会顺利的
because I am gonna see her every chance I get.
因为一有机会我就会去见她
You know we got to put a stop to this.
我们必须出面阻止
So we told Jimmy Uncle Jonas died
于是我们告诉吉米强纳斯叔叔去世了
and that we were going to the funeral.
我们要去参加葬礼
But instead we went to spy on Rachel.
但其实我们去监视瑞秋了
We figured that since she was away at college,
我们觉得瑞秋远在学校
Rachel was probably already cheating on Jimmy,
说不定早就劈腿了
but we had to go up there and get proof.
我们得去一趟拿出证据来
So to blend in, Burt and I dressed like students
伯特和我照着电影扮成学生
in all the college movies we saw.
从而混入学校
This isn't anything like the college movies we saw.
这和我们在电影里看到的完全不同
Yeah.
是啊
Where's the uptight dean and the crazy frat guys and...
怎么不见神经质院长和疯狂的兄弟会成员
where's the kangaroo, for God's sake?
连袋鼠都没看见
I'm pretty sure you dreamt that movie.
那电影肯定是你梦到的
No. Indiana Jones and the Planet of the Pickles was a dream.
不是《夺宝奇兵》和《泡菜星球》是梦
I'm pretty sure this one's real.
这个绝对不是
Ooh, there's Rachel.
瑞秋在那儿
I recognize her from the picture.
是照片上的女孩
I can't believe how hot she is.
她居然这么辣
I mean, the picture cut her off at the waist.
我是说照片上只有上半身
I just assumed her ass ballooned out.
我还以为她是个大屁♥股♥
That must be the guy she's cheating on Jimmy with!
那个一定是第三者