家有喜旺（2010）

Raising Hope S03E09

Part 4 Nov. 24, 2020, 1:10 p.m.

Ah! Dang it!
该死
I have to start wearing my thimble again.
又要开始戴顶针了
Natesville Auxiliary Police.
纳什维尔辅警
Uh, you have the right to voluntarily open up this door.
你有权自己开门
What do you want? I'm busy.
想怎样我忙着呢
Hurry up! It hurts!
快来很痛的
I know! Shut up!
我知道闭嘴
Do you know how to get rid of splinters?
你知道怎样挑刺吗
I'm watching my sister's kids, man;
我在帮姐姐照看孩子伙计
I'm in way over my head.
我快要被折腾死了
Give me that safety pin.
把别针给哥
Thank you, officer.
谢谢你警官
That vet sure treated us like we're idiots.
那兽医当咱是傻子
We're not idiots.
咱才不傻
Of course not.
就是的
I mean, even if that is how animals have sex,
就算动物真是那样做♥爱♥的
how were we supposed to know that?
我们咋能知道呢
Well, you're supposed to be the expert.
你应该是专家啊
You're a landscaper.
你是扫庭院的啊
Your whole workday is outside.
你的工作就在户外
From night to noon, you're in their world.
一天到晚跟它们混在一起
I don't stare.
我又不偷♥窥♥
I'm not a pervert.
我又不是变♥态♥
Who do you think I am,
你当我是那只乌鸦啊
that creepy crow that hangs out by the playground?
阴测测地晃来晃去吓死个人
I don't care what the vet says.
管他怎么说呢
Any normal person who saw what we saw
任何正常人看到那情景
would have hunted down that squirrel, captured him,
都会追捕他抓获他
kept him in a cage till he escaped,
把他关起来被他逃了
and then with no other options, sentenced him to castration.
然后别无选择只得阉♥割♥
We're not gonna tell anybody about this, are we?
这事得烂在肚子里对吧
Absolutely not.
必须的
Hey, what are you doing here?
你怎么在这儿
I had to bring her home.
我必须带她回来
I just couldn't do it.
我做不到
I just don't think I have what it takes to be a mother.
我不会是个好母亲的
I mean, God tried to tell me by giving me narrow hips,
上帝给我造了个小屁♥股♥来提醒我
but I just didn't listen.
我却不听劝
First, she wanted to watch her dee Dee the Dancing Dolphin DVD.
首先她让我给她放《舞蹈海豚迪迪》
And I love Morgan Freeman,
我很爱摩根·弗里曼
but somebody has got to tell that guy
但必须有人告诉他
that it is okay to turn down a job.
不想做的工作完全可以拒绝
And when that was finally over,
后来终于演完了
Hope wanted to watch it again.
喜旺还想再看一次
And again.
又一次
And again.
又一次
And again.
又一次
And then she wanted to play "Knock down the block tower."
接下来她想"推大楼"
so I built her a block tower and she knocked it down,
于是我堆起大楼她推倒
while she watched Dee Dee The Dancing Dolphin.
同时看着《舞蹈海豚迪迪》
Again.
一次
And again. And again.
又一次又一次
And then she wanted to hear harriet hugs a hippo,
然后她想听"喇♥嘛♥与哑巴"
Which, by the way, is ten "H" Words strewn together
就是好多韵母相同的字
to make sentences, all right?
组成的绕口令
"Harriet happily hugs a hairy hippo while a horse hugs a ham."
提鳎目的喇♥嘛♥要拿鳎目换别喇叭哑巴的喇叭
And how do I know that?
我怎么背下来的呢
Because I read it to her 20 times
因为我给她读了二十遍
while she knocked down the block tower,
同时她还要推大楼
while watched Dee Dee The Dancing Dolphin.
同时还看着《舞蹈海豚迪迪》
Again. And again. And again.
一次又一次没完没了
And that's when I passed out.
然后我就昏倒了
And that's when this happened.
然后我就成了这样
And that is when I started calling
然后我开始胡乱使唤
random nannies from my childhood,
以前那些保姆的名字
so I could go to the bathroom and drink a peach martini
好趁空去洗手间喝杯小酒
and read us magazine.
看杂♥志♥
And that is when I realized:
于是我发现
I'm just like my mother.
我跟我妈一个德行
You're not like your mother.
你跟你妈不一样
You love being with Hope.
你喜欢跟喜旺在一起
You're just better at the fun stuff,
只是你比较擅长带她玩
and I'm better at being nurturing.
而我比较擅长管教她
And it's okay, as long as Hope has both of us.
只要咱俩都在喜旺身边就好
While I was on patrol,
我巡逻的时候
I stumbled across someone's organic garden,
偶然发现了一个有机花♥园♥
and I brought you a treat.
就给你带了份礼物
They grew strawberries in this.
这是用来种草莓的
I love strawberries.
我喜欢草莓
Hope, what are you doing out of bed? It's late.
喜旺你怎么下床了都几点了
Let me do this.
让我来
It's the one thing I'm good at.
我也就擅长这个了
Hope, I need you to go back to bed
喜旺我要你回房♥去
and go to sleep, okay?
上♥床♥睡觉好吗
No!
不要
Why isn't this working?
怎么没用了
I don't know.
我不知道
Hope, I said it's time to go to bed.
喜旺我说该睡觉了
No, mommy.
不要嘛妈咪
She called me "mommy".
她叫我妈咪
Sabrina may not have proved to herself she was mother material,
塞布丽娜或许觉得自己不会当妈
but by spending a whole weekend doing all the hard work,
但这周末她整整两天任劳任怨
she proved it to Hope.
让她得到了喜旺的认可
And while being called mommy didn't make all the
被叫妈咪虽然不能降低
monotonous, boring parts of raising a kid any easier,
养孩子的无聊程度
it made them worth it.
但使一切付出变得值得
Of course, the downside was that once a kid bonds with you
坏处是一旦和孩子建立起亲子关系
and knows that you love them unconditionally,
让她知道你的爱是无条件的
they aren't afraid of you anymore.
孩子就不再怕你了
Right on time. Come in!
来得正好进来
So, sometimes you have to call a professional authority figure.
所以有时你得请专业权威人士
Hope, go to bed this instant!
喜旺立刻给我上♥床♥
Well, glad I could help.
很高兴能帮上忙
I have to head down to the hospital now
我还得去趟医院
and get a statement from Dancin' Dan.
听跳舞丹说明情况
Apparently, some sicko drugged him in the park
肯定是哪个神经病在公园给他下了毒
and gave him a nasty ear infection.
让他的耳朵被严重感染了