家有喜旺（2010）

Raising Hope S03E07

Part 2 Nov. 24, 2020, 1:10 p.m.

I had just started working at Knock Knock Knock Housekeeping.
那时我刚开始干家政清洁
And Jimmy just started his lifelong love afffair
而吉米也刚刚开始玩爆竹
with firing explosives.
这后来成了他一生的挚爱
Ladies and gentlemen, please excuse my sweating.
女士们先生们请原谅我满头大汗
It must be at least 70 degrees out here.
这鬼天气绝对有二十多度了
Now, remember, if you don't want next year's entertainment
都给我听好了如果你们不想明年
to be me covering Blues Traveler's songs again,
还听我嚎蓝调旅者的歌♥助兴的话
we're gonna need every child to participate in the candy drive.
那就让镇上的孩子们都把糖果卖♥♥起来吧
So what do you say, parents?
你们觉得如何家长们
Come and get this candy.
快来拿糖果吧
Look at them.
瞧啊
You know those crazy parents will be selling the candy for their kids.
你懂的这些疯家长一定会帮他们小孩卖♥♥糖的
Which will teach the kids nothing.
这能让孩子有什么长进啊
I guarantee you, 20 years from now,
我敢肯定二十年后
those brats will still be living at home.
这些小破孩还只能靠啃老过活
Rosa and I were speaking the same language,
尽管罗莎的口音很搞笑
even though she had a funny accent.
但她和我还是属于同一次元的
We both agreed that
我们达成了共识
we wouldn't be the kind of parents who do everything for their kids.
绝不能变成为了小孩不顾一切的脑残家长
It's hot. Can I get in?
好热啊我能到水里凉快下吗
Have you sold any candy?
糖卖♥♥出去了吗
Not yet.
没有
Sorry, kid. No cash, no splash.
抱歉孩子不交钱就不能冲凉
Kiddie pool's for closers.
能赚钱的小孩才能进泳池
Oh, come on, can't you help me?
别这样嘛帮帮我嘛
I want to be the little pilgrim.
我想当那个小小清教♥徒♥
Sorry, hon, no can do.
对不起亲爱的不行
We're doing this for your own good.
我们这么做也是为了你好
Work builds character.
努力才能成人啊
I'm gonna see if Rosa and Carlos
我去找罗莎和卡洛斯
will give us some free astro pops.
看看他们能不能白送我们点棒棒糖
Count me in. I want one.
算我一个我也想要一个
Me, too.
我也要
Sorry kid, astro pops are for closers.
没门儿小鬼能赚钱的小孩才能吃棒棒糖
I thought we said we weren't
我们不是说好
gonna help them sell chocolate.
不帮孩子卖♥♥巧克力的吗
Andale, Andale, Andale!
闪了闪了闪了
Jimmy, remember how we said we were
吉米你记得我们说好
finally gonna take you to the movies tonight to see Aladdin?
今天晚上带你去看《阿♥拉♥丁》吗
Yeah!
记得
Well, that's off.
电影取消了
We're going to war.
我们有场恶仗要打
You guys suck at this.
你们俩逊毙了
We tried.
我们已经尽力了
We went to every house in the neighborhood,
我们挨家挨户地走遍了
but no one even answered the door.
可人家连门都不肯开
Those crazy religious people ruined it for everyone.
这群老古板真扫兴
The problem isn't you, Virginia.
问题不在你维吉妮亚
It's those crummy candy bars.
那些寒酸的巧克力才是罪魁祸首
Just 'cause they're brown and filled with nuts,
它长得是像屎
doesn't mean they need to taste like crap.
但不一定非得吃起来也像屎啊
Don't worry.
别担心
Maw maw's got an idea.
奶奶有办法
It was time for us to bring out the big guns.
于是我们使出了杀手锏
So maw maw started
奶奶快马加鞭
whipping up a batch of her own special chocolate.
赶制了一炉她自创的巧克力
Of course, she only used the finest of ingredients.
当然她用的都是上等的原料
There were plenty of people in the confection game,
会做巧克力的不止奶奶一个
But what made her cocoa so loco
但为什么她的巧克力能如此诱人
was her secret ingredient,
那是因为她有一招独门绝技
Bacon drippings.
培根油
She had created the most delicious and addictive food known to man.
她做出了举世无双令人欲罢不能的顶级美味
We called it Maw Maw's Magic Brown.
我们将它命名为奶奶的魔力小棕棒
Once people got a taste, word spread.
美味很快一传十十传百
Everyone was hooked.
人人都为之疯狂
And that started a major turf war.
而战争才刚刚拉开序幕
Burt!
伯特
They hit us,
他们对我们的伤害
but we hit them back harder.
我们必十倍还之
When the dust had settled
尘埃落定时
and the candy was gone,
糖果尽散去
it was time to count up the earnings
也是时候清点卖♥♥糖所得
and see who was gonna ride that float.
看看谁能登上花车了
Well,
矮油
quite a lot of chimmies in those changas.
料不少嘛
Looks like Rosa's the winner.
看来是罗莎赢了
Hold on.
等一下
I've got this contest
这场比赛我赢定了
in the bag.
看我这包
Or should I say, bags?
或者我是不是该说这些包
That was Burt's line, but I think he stole it
这是伯特的主意但我觉得
from an episode of MacGyver.
他是从《百战天龙》里窃取的灵感
Seeing Jimmy up on that float made me feel proud
看到吉米坐在花车上我无比骄傲
that we were able to win the contest for him.
原来我们也是有能力帮他赢得比赛的
He was so happy.
他好开心
But then I realized that even though Jimmy was happy,
可是之后我意识到吉米是开心了
we made another child very sad,
但另一个孩子会因此而难过
and all of a sudden, I didn't feel so good.
突然之间我的心情又没那么好了
At that moment, Rosa and I both realized
在那一刻罗莎和我都意识到
there are no winners in a candy war.
糖果大战中没有赢家
And there's been peace between the families ever since.
从那以后我们就一直和平相处
So if you want Hope to ride on that float,
所以如果你想让喜旺登上花车
you're gonna have to do it without our help.
就得全靠自己我们不会帮忙的
Fine. I'll do it on my own.
好自己来就自己来
We need to call a plumber.
打电♥话♥叫修水管的人来
The toilet in here won't flush.
马桶冲不了水了
I thought you said "cookie."
我以为你说的是"曲奇"
It sounded like you said "cookie."
你说的就像是"曲奇"
Why would I say,
我怎么会说
"If we hurry, we can have a cookie in the shower"?
"如果我们赶时间就边淋浴边吃块曲奇"
Doesn't even make sense.
这根本说不通嘛
That's why I said no.
所以我才拒绝了
Damn, never get that one back.
该死再也拿不回那块了
Rosa?
罗莎
Andale, Andale, Andale!
闪快闪快闪啊
Andale, Andale, Andale!
快快快
Rosa's back in the candy game!
罗莎又杀回糖果大战了
She and Carlos are selling chocolate bars out of their ice cream truck.
她和卡洛斯在冰激凌车上卖♥♥巧克力棒
That dirty, lying, chocolate-slinging ho!
这个不择手段卖♥♥巧克力的贱♥人♥
Fire up the bunsen burner.
煤气灯点起来
We're gonna drop some cocoa madness on those chumps.
我们要重掀巧克力狂潮了
Once we learned Rosa was back to dealing candy bars,
得知罗莎重回糖果战场后
we knew our only chance at getting Hope to win the contest
我们知道帮喜旺赢得比赛的唯一机会
was to pull maw maw out of retirement.
就是让奶奶重出江湖
When maw maw's recipe hit the streets,
奶奶一出
the Chance family was back on top.
谁与争锋
When Rosa's family knew we were back in business,
罗莎一家知道我们重出江湖后
things got rough.
事态失控了
Let this be a lesson.
给我听好了
Don't screw with the Flores family.
千万别惹佛洛雷斯家
And we weren't gonna take that lying down.
我们才不会轻易认输
As sticky as things were getting on the streets,
那边以牙还牙全数回报
things were starting to melt on the inside, too.
这边手头的活也忙得脚不点地
Are you boosting?
还小偷小摸了嘿
Come on.
求你了
I need it. I just...
我好想吃我我我
We've been working all night, and I-I need the energy.
我们忙了一整夜要补充能量啊
Plus they're just... they're so good.
而且它实在好吃疯了
Bitch, you know we don't get high on our own supply.
小贱♥货♥你忘了吗这些不对内供应
While we were fighting mayhem at home,
在我们自相残害的同时