消消气（2000）

Curb Your Enthusiasm S10E01

Part 2 Oct. 2, 2020, 11 a.m.

Stop moving it? It's... Every time I, I, I lean on it,
我别摇它？我...我手一放上去
it's gonna move. Put your foot on it, like everybody else does.
它就会乱动你脚踩着它点儿别人都这么做的
I'm gonna sit with my foot on the table?
我坐这儿还得把脚踩上去？
Yeah, that's how you hold it down. The floors are wobbly.
是的这样就能固定桌子是这个地面不平
Mocha Joe, can I give you a little advice? Yeah.
摩卡乔我能给你一点小建议吗？你说
Nobody likes a wobbly table.
没人喜欢会摇的桌子
Fastest way to lose customers is wobbly tables.
桌子摇一摇你的顾客就都没了
I got an uncle with a wobbly leg.
我有个叔叔腿不稳也摇
I can't stand that motherfucker.
我就完全受不了他
Leaning on shit all the time.
成天靠这儿靠那儿的
Hmm.
嗯
Aah.
啊
Taste your coffee.
尝尝你的咖啡
Cold. It's cold.
冷的它冷了
Hey, man.
嘿兄弟
- Yeah. - Hey, Mocha Joe.
是嘿摩卡乔
What?
怎么？
This is cold coffee.
这咖啡是冷的
Whoa, whoa. Wait a second.
哇哇你等下
That coffee is not cold.
那杯咖啡才不是冷的
Is your coffee cold? Your coffee's hot, right?
你的咖啡是冷的吧？你的咖啡是热的对吧？
Look, we don't wanna be fuckin' haters right now,
听着我们不想当什么找茬的混♥蛋♥
but this shit is cold.
但这玩意儿是冷的
Can, can I get a n...
我我能不能...
- Can I get a new cup? - No.
我能不能换一杯？不能
So you're not gonna give me a new cup. No.
所以你不会给我重做一杯了不会
'Cause that's a hot cup of coffee.
因为这杯咖啡没冷
It was hot when I gave it to you... That's a hot cup of coffee?
我给你的时候它是热的它是热的？
It's a hot cup of coffee. It was hot when I gave it to you.
这是杯热咖啡我交到你手里的时候它是热的
Would you stick your nose in a hot cup of coffee?
你敢把鼻子泡到热咖啡里吗？
Why would you stick your nose...
为什么你要把鼻子...
Because I want to prove to you
因为我要证明给你看
that it's cold coffee. Watch this.
这咖啡是冷的你看好了
That's cold coffee.
冷咖啡
- That doesn't prove anything except... - It does.
这啥都说明不了只能证明这不证明了吗
... that you're an old, bald nut!
...证明你是个又老又秃的精神病！
- What'd you say to me? - You heard me.
你说我是什么？我就这么说了
Now get out, you old, bald fuck! With pleasure!
现在给我滚你个又老又秃的王八蛋！我巴不得！
You think I want to sit here with a wobbly table,
你以为我想坐在这个桌子摇来摇去的地方
and drink cold black coffee? Yeah.
喝冷掉的咖啡吗？可不是吗
- No, thank you. - Yeah, good. Get out.
不了谢谢你啊是好极了滚吧
Hey. Larry might be one or two of those things, but not all three.
嘿你说拉里的那三个词他可能占一两个吧你用三个是不对的
Happy New Year, Larry.
新年快乐拉里
Happy New Year, Mocha Joe!
新年快乐摩卡乔！
Morning, Larry. How are you?
早安拉里吃了吗
Your dog? Bogey!
这狗你的？这是博热！
He's eating out of my bowl.
他在用我的碗吃东西
Oh, I just got that bowl from the kitchen.
哦这碗我从厨房♥里拿的
I thought it was an office bowl.
我以为这是办公室公用的
It's an office bowl for humans.
这是办公室给人公用的
Not for dogs.
不给狗用
I mean, I wash it at the end of the day
我是说我回家前会洗这个碗
- with soap, and then I dry it, and... - No, that's not enough.
用洗碗液然后擦干再... 不这样也不行
It needs to be sterilized. I can't, I can't...
它需要除菌我不能不能...
share a bowl with a dog.
和一条狗共用一个碗
Uh, I've got some mail for you. Ah!
呃我这有封给你的信啊！
And there's some other stuff. Wait a second. Wait a second.
还有些别的东西等等别动
Look at this. Yeah.
哎哟这个嗯哼
Is that new? Relatively.
新纹的？算新吧
All right, what... What the hell is that? Why is one eye closed?
好吧这...这啥玩意啊？为什么一只眼睛是闭着的？
Huh? What is all that?
哈？有什么意思吗？
Oh, well, it's kind of personal. I don't...
哦这么说吧这有点私人我不想...
I don't share it with everybody.
我不想让别人都知道
Yeah, it's very personal.
哈是很私人
The whole world can see it, but it's personal.
全世界都能看到但这是个人隐私
- Well, it's on my body. - Okay, okay.
没办法它在我身上好吧好吧
Hey, let me ask you something, okay?
嘿我有个问题你回答下行么？
If I walked in here with a horn on my head,
如果我走进来我头上有犄角
would you say, "What are you doing with a horn on your head?"
你会问"你头上装个角干嘛呢？"
I'd say, "Oh, I can't tell you. It's personal."
我是不是也可以说"哦我就不告诉你这是个人隐私"
I got the tattoo because of an event in my life,
我是因为发生了重要的事才纹这个纹身的
and it means something special to me.
它对我有特殊的含义
It's a reminder of that to me.
会让我想起那件事
- It's just for me. - Really?
这是只属于我的是吗？
Then why didn't you put it on your ass?
那你为啥不纹在屁♥股♥上？
I have something from the business manager that you need to sign.
我这有些业务经理的文件需要你签字
Ah. All right.
啊行啊
Okay. Uh, it's just...
好呃这只是...
There's an initial, and a date,
这里写姓名首字母还有日期
and I think three signatures.
我觉得需要三个签名
May I?
借用一下？
Oh, what are you doing? That's my shirt.
哦你在干嘛？这是我的衣服
Well, I was... cleaning my glasses.
呃我在...擦我的眼镜
You can't clean your glasses with a shirt that I'm wearing
你不能用我的衣服擦眼镜
while I'm wearing it.
我还穿着呢
It's inappropriate. It's crossing a boundary.
这很不礼貌越界了
No good? No good.
不好？不好
Hmm. Okay.
嗯行吧
I know. Susie loves this house even more than her last one.
我知道苏西很喜欢现在这个房♥子比前一个还喜欢
Well, the last one stunk.
这么说前一个房♥子烂透了
It was too big.
那个太大了
And he called me, uh... He called me old and bald.
然后他叫我... 他叫我老秃子
- What? - I swear to God.
真的？我对天发誓
You know, I'll tell you something. I love coffee,
听着我要跟你说个事我爱咖啡
and I love his coffee, but you're one of my old...
而且我爱他家做的咖啡但你是我的老...
You are my oldest friend.
你是我最久的朋友
I'm gonna boycott that place.
我要抵♥制♥他们店
You're gonna boycott Mocha Joe's? I'm boycotting.
你要抵♥制♥摩卡乔家？我要抵♥制♥
Hey! How about that?
嘿！怎么样？
I'm boycotting Mocha Joe. You can't do that to my friend. Hey.
我要抵♥制♥摩卡乔他不能这样对我的朋友嘿
- Look at this guy. Look at this guy. - That's a friend.
瞧瞧这人瞧瞧这才是真朋友
We were in the same hospital together.
我们还住同一家医院
He can't fuck with my friend. All right!
他不能惹我的朋友可不是
I'm gonna get some coffee. Okay.
我去拿点咖啡好
Enjoy your coffee.
喝的开心
He's boycotting. He's boycotting. That's a big move.
他要抵♥制♥ 他要抵♥制♥ 这可是玩大的了
That's a big move, a boycott. Oh, my God.
玩的够大的抵♥制♥ 我的天
Who invited you? You pig.
谁邀请你了？你这头猪
No, uh, Nancy, that is not Harvey Weinstein.
不呃南希他不是哈维韦恩斯坦
I'm so sorry, Jeff. My sister's from out of town. Oh!
杰夫我真的很抱歉我妹妹是从外地来的哦！
I'm just, I'm really sorry. Oh, my God. Oh, I'm so...
我真的真的很抱歉哦天啊我实在...
I'm the host of the party. Oh, my God! I'm so sorry.
这是我办的派对哦天哪！我太抱歉了
Yes, I'm not Harvey Weinstein.
对我不是哈维韦恩斯坦
I'm sorry. Thank you. I'm sorry. Okay.
对不起很感谢你我很抱歉没事
He looks like Harvey Weinstein. He looks just like him.
他像哈维韦恩斯坦他看起来就是
What the hell? Okay.
什么鬼？没事啦
All the time, women, men... doesn't matter.
所有人都认错女人男人... 管他了
Geez. And suddenly, I'm this guy.
靠然后突然间我就变成他了
- Unbelievable. - Unbelievable.
不敢相信不敢相信
I'm starving. Oh! Pigs in a blanket.
我饿死了哦！有猪肉卷
- What's better? - Oh...
还有啥更好的？哦...
I've been following her around all night, but she never has any.
我一晚上都跟在她屁♥股♥后面但她总是没剩下
They go fast.
一下就被抢光了
I don't care how foo - foo the other items are,
我不关心其他东西有多好吃
and people love 'em, pigs in a blanket. Yeah.
所有人都喜欢猪肉卷是啊
Larry, I am extremely displeased with your behavior.
拉里你的行为很令人不快
Ladies and gentlemen,
女士们先生们
the 16th president of these United States...
美国第十六任总统...
Yeah, yeah. You're funny. ... Abraham Lincoln.
哈哈你真会说笑 ...亚伯拉罕林肯
Let's give him a big round of applause.
让我们掌声有请