辛普森一家

The Simpsons S30E02

Part 2 Feb. 1, 2020, 7:50 p.m.

After you sign the amazing waivers.
死法太多了
So many ways to die.
从岩石上摔落被岩石砸中
Falling off rocks, rocks falling on me.
感染弓形虫
Toxoplasmosis?
就是这玩意吃了帅气汤姆的脸
That's what ate Handsome Tom's face.
叫我帅气侯默吧
Just call me Handsome Homer.
-再见妈妈 -别感染弓形虫
- Bye, Mom! - Don't get toxoplasmosis!
奇幻之旅
欢迎来到《奇幻之旅》
Welcome to The Amazing Place.
你们将接受意志力
You're about to embark on a test of mental toughness,
身体素质和一些明明已经结束了
physical strength and interviews where you have to pretend
还需要假装在挑战什么的
that you're in the middle of a challenge
采访的考验
when it's already over.
但首先先从情人环礁湖的
But first, let's kick things off with a romantic beachside luau
海滨宴会开始
at Lover's Lagoon.
就在你们第一次挑战之后
Right after your first challenge.
我们从每个人的包包中
We took one item from every person's bag
拿走了一样东西♥藏♥在另一个参赛者的行李中
and hid it in another contestant's luggage.
所有人现在去找你们行李箱的藏匿物吧
Everyone, find their Suitcase Stowaway now.
这是终极停机坪开箱突袭
It's the ultimate Tarmac Unpack Attack.
好吧行李箱藏匿物
Okay, Suitcase Stowaway.
他们这样干过三次
They've done this three times before.
秘诀是倒出来找
Here's the secret: dump and dig.
我找到了我的藏匿物
I found my stowaway.
太好了去翻我另外一个包
Great. Go through my other bag.
好吧老侯别慌
Okay, Homie, don't panic.
秘诀就是慢慢来然后...
The secret is to just take your time, and...yo
抱歉侯默和马姬你们被...
I'm sorry, Homer and Marge, you've been...
-别说出来 -号♥角淘汰
- Don't say it. - ...shell-iminated.
不不不不不
No, no. No, no, no.
我们不能成为第一对被淘汰的夫妇
We can't be the first couple kicked off.
这是终极耻辱
That's the ultimate humiliation.
《奇幻之旅》
我连泳衣都没机会穿上
I never even put on a swimsuit.
我连看一眼环礁湖的机会都没有了
I never got to see the lagoon.
我在哭连个拍我们的人都没有
I'm crying, and no one's even filming me.
我们连停机坪都没出就被淘汰了
We can't even make it off the tarmac.
都因为我搞砸了
All because of my screwup.
我想我们要回家了
I guess we're going home.
不你们去那里
No, you're going there.
机场后院酒店
酒店但我们输了
A hotel? But we lost.
如果我们现在让你们回去
If we let you go home now, fans would know
粉丝们在这季开播前就会知道你们被淘汰了
you've been kicked off before the season airs.
所以被淘汰的参赛选手必须在所有集数
So ejected contestants must stay at this hotel
全部录制完毕之前待在这个宾馆里
until every epise is finished taping.
所以我们还有一个月才能回家
So we can't go home for a month?
算上后期的话是六个礼拜
Six weeks, counting post.
我根本不知道什么叫后期
I don't know what post is.
你等到录"再聚首"节目的时候再哭吧
Hey, save some of those tears for the reunion show.
你们只会让我们坐最后一排连问题都不问
You'll just put us in the back row and won't ask any questions.
甚至连拥抱冠军的机会都没有
We won't even get to hug the winner.
是啊但是第二名一般都会在旁边
Yeah, but the runner-up's always wandering around
晃来晃去的希望有人抱他
looking for someone to hug.
你可以抓住这个机会
That's your play.
我怎么这么菜啊
How could I be such a noob?
给我一点时间我可以试着去爱一只小菜鸡
I could learn to love a noob, given time.
我已经开始想孩子了
I already miss the kids.
总会有在不惹麻烦的情况下
Well, there's got to be a way we can call home
打给家里的办法的
without getting in trouble.
如果你泄露或暗示了
If you say anything that reveals or implies
你们已经被《奇幻之旅》节目淘汰了的话
that you have been ejected from The Amazing Place,
你们将会面临一笔最高一百万美元的罚款
you are subject to a fine of up to a million dollars
若你们是乔治亚州居民还可能面临死刑
and, for residents of Georgia, the death penalty.
宝贝们你们还好吗
Kids, kids, how are you?
丽莎不让我用泡泡浴盐
Lisa said I can't use the bubble bath,
但你明明说是给大家买♥♥的
but you said you bought it for everybody.
别管什么泡泡浴盐了
Forget the bubble bath.
节目怎么样
How's the show?
你们领先了吗
Are you winning?
我不太方便说
Um, I'm not supposed to say.
那说明你把他们虐爆了
That means you're dominating.
我就知道
I knew it!
不不我们没有虐爆他们
No, no, we're not dominating.
我没有泄露或暗示这一点
I didn't reveal or imply that.
你们总不可能已经被淘汰了吧
Well, you can't have gotten kicked off yet.
你们刚到那啊
You just got there.
你们的母亲与我都非常荣幸
"Your mother and I are excited
能够成为《奇幻之旅》大家庭的一份子
to be part of the Amazing Place family.
其他相关问题应以书面形式递交到
All further inquiries should be submitted in writing
加利福尼亚州伯班克市堂迪布斯科影视公♥司♥
to Don DiBusco Productions, Burbank, California."
你呜哩哇啦的说什么呢
What the hell are you talking about?
本次通话到此为止
This conversation is hereby terminated.
你们分别被授予了使用一勺浴盐的权利
You are each entitled to one capful of bubble bath.
你看这才叫家长中的模范
Now, that's parenting.
振作点宝贝这也没那么糟啦
Come on, baby, it's not so bad.
真的吗
Really?
要离开孩子们爷爷
Six weeks away from the kids,
我的姐♥妹♥们♥和你的工作六个月
Grampa, my sisters, your job.
除了在这享受免费的房♥间服务
With nothing to do but eat free room service
偶尔被要求看看傻缺电影顺便享受
and watch dopey movies on demand while they keep us quiet
他们为了让我们闭嘴提供的酒之外无事可做
with an endless supply of free booze.
这简直是场噩梦
It's a nightmare.
是啊真是场噩梦
It is. It truly is.
宾馆入住守则
* 我彻夜未眠花天酒地 *
I was up late night ballin'
* 数着手里成千上百的钞票 *
Countin' up hundreds by the thousand
* 我彻夜未眠花天酒地 *
I was up late night ballin'
* 数着手里成千上百的钞票 *
Countin' up hundreds by the thousand
一周后
是这样的柯蒂斯
You see, Curtis,
在把那一集看上三遍之前
you never really get an episode of SportsCenter
你永远理解不了《世界体育中心》这个节目
until you've seen it for the third time.
需要我再给您加一盘开胃菜吗
Can I freshen up that appetizer platter for you?P
不了我得去看看我妻子
Nah, I better go check in on my wife.
她还不太适应宾馆生活
She's having a hard time adjusting to hotel living.
你就让我打扫吧
Just let me clean.
甜心我很担心你
Sweetie, I'm worried about you.
你每天就这么坐着
You just sit around all day changing
偶尔去改改房♥间保险箱的密♥码♥
the combination on the room safe.
你想在保险箱里放点什么吗
Do you want to put something in the room safe?
我不配拥有值钱的东西
I don't deserve valuables.
是我的错让咱们困在这儿的
It's my fault we're stuck here.
我只配一个人坐着
All I deserve is to sit alone
看关于这家宾馆的电视频道
and watch the TV channel that's about the hotel.
接下来为您介绍商务中心
忘记带牙刷了没有关系
Forgot your toothbrush? No problem.
桑得利斯礼品店拥有每个旅客需要的一切用品
Sundries gift shop has all the toiletries every traveler needs.
桑德利斯很棒这件衣服就是在那买♥♥的
Sundries is awesome. I got this shirt there.
听着我知道你很难过
Look, I know you're miserable,
但让我给你介绍一下这个地方有多棒
but let me show you how great this place can be.
这就是个蠢爆了的连锁宾馆
It's just a stupid chain hotel.
握住我的手达令你会发现远不止如此
Darling, take my hand, and you'll see it's so much more.
* 虽然你搞砸了挑战 *
* Well, since you blew the challenge *
* 而我们也遭到禁言 *
* And we're not allowed to tell *
* 我们却能住在机场宾馆 *
We're getting all expenses paid at
* 吃穿用度有人代为支付 *
Airport Hotel
* 泡沫枕多舒服呀宝贝 *
* The pillow's so foamy, baby *
* 一通电♥话♥就有人送来食物 *
* Order food on the phone-y *
* 还有三角巧克力吃呢所以不要哭 *
* We'll eat Toblerone-y, so don't cry *
瑞士巧克力品牌国内译名为"三角"
*早餐有贝果没配熏鲑鱼的奶油芝士*
*For breakfast they have bagel. Cream cheese but no lox*
*迷你麦片包倒够一碗惬意肆吃*
*A mini pack of cereal, make a bowl out of the box*
*游泳池氯光粼粼毛巾袖珍可亲*
*The pool's so chlorine-y, baby The towel's so teeny*