辛普森一家
The Simpsons S30E09
Part 3
Feb. 1, 2020, 7:52 p.m.
你儿子呢
Where's your boy?
什么事这么急 朋友
What's your hurry, friend?
候默 别想用你那过去时代的
Now, Homer, don't you try to disarm us
优雅谈吐让我们卸下武装
with your genteel mannerisms of a bygone era there.
怎么了 我不知你们为何事而如此纠结
Why, I haven't a notion as to what you are importuning,
尊敬的先生
good sir.
除草剂
不好意思 锡丝拉克先生
Excuse me, Mr. Szyslak.
锡丝拉克先生 我们认识你
Mr. Szyslak, we know you.
我父亲喜欢在您的酒吧饮酒
My father likes to drink at your bar.
你不能跟我打个招呼吗
You can't say hi to me?
那您呢 韦根警长
And how 'bout you, Chief Wiggum?
我和您儿子一起上学 拉尔夫
I go to school with your boy, Ralph.
能麻烦您代我向拉尔夫问好吗
Give my regards to Ralph, would you, please?
大伙都走吧 他们已经平息了咱们的怒火了
All right, let's go, people. They've defused us.
所有人都最后咕哝一句吧
Everyone get, uh, get one last mutter in.
丽莎 亲爱的 你救了我
Oh, Lisa, sweetie, you saved me.
不 爸爸 是你用你的冷静和勇敢
No, Dad, you saved us all
救了我们大家
with your calmness and bravery.
-谢谢 有件事求你 -什么事 爸爸
- Thanks. Just one thing. - Yes, Dad?
别告诉你妈
Don't tell your mother about the mob
有伙暴徒差点杀了你哥哥
that almost killed your brother.
她已经开始喜欢他了
She's taken a liking to him.
什么
The what?
你又在洗澡时幻听了 马姬
You're hearing things in the shower again, Marge.
好吧
Oh, okay.
抱歉
Sorry.
好吧 阿麦 把你的安抚奶嘴给我
Okay, Maggie, you give me your binky,
我就把这个熊玩偶给你
and I'll give you this substitution bear doll.
你战胜不了瘾 马姬
You can't beat addiction, Marge.
我就对阿加莎·克里斯蒂写的书上瘾
I got addicted to Agatha Christie books.
我一直觉得凶手就是那个自认博学的比利时人
I always thought the murderer was that know-it-all Belgian.
结果 他是侦探
Turns out, he was the detective.
41本书了我一点都没看出来
41 books, and I never saw it coming.
-怎么了 -打了一架
- What happened? - Got in a fight.
为什么 那个孩子怎么你了
Why? What did the other kid do?
他说爸爸很懒又没用
Said Dad was lazy and incompetent.
那个孩子在哪
And where is this other kid?
你和你哥哥打了一架
You got in a fight with your brother?
我打赢我哥哥了
I won a fight with my brother.
-说谎 -那就再来啊
- Liar. - Let's go again.
让她住手 妈妈
Stop her, Mom.
为了防止尿床 医生推荐
To combat bed-wetting, doctors recommend
改变饮酒时间 按计划上厕所
shifting times for drinking, scheduling bathroom breaks,
多鼓励孩子 我不会承认说过这话
and being encouraging. I'll deny having said this,
但下次你尿湿床 让他们打你屁♥股♥
but the next time you wet your bed, have 'em spank you.
下一个
Next.
等下 你不是小孩 无所谓了
Wait, you're not a kid. Doesn't matter.
你有45秒时间 开始计时
You've got 45 seconds. Go.
我担心我女儿在毁了自己家
I'm worried that my daughter is ruining her family
盲目崇拜自己的爸爸
idolizing her father.
明白了 马姬 一个小女孩
I see. Wow. Marge, it's totally normal
迷恋自己的父亲是再正常不过的事了
for a little girl to be infatuated with her father.
这没有什么大碍 而且出发点是好的
It's safe and comes from a good place,
当她不再迷恋时 就会把一切怪在你的身上
and when it ends, it's another thing she'll blame you for.
好吧 我担心我丈夫不能一直
Yes, well, I'm afraid my husband isn't always
做一个好榜样
a perfect influence.
马姬 我有个法律问题要处理
Marge, I've got a legal matter to deal with.
我出去等
I'll be outside.
我还担心我儿子觉得自己被忽略了
Also, I'm worried that my son is feeling neglected.
你丈夫得找个万无一失的理由
Your husband has to give your daughter the perfect speech,
让她失望 但又不会将她撕成两半
which lets her down but doesn't snap her in two.
一定记住不要再生孩子了
And make sure you don't have any more kids.
听起来是场灾难
Sounds like it'll be a disaster.
很高兴认识你 三年后再会
Whoa, nice to meet you. See you in three years.
再见
Now, good-bye.
-候默 -什么
- Homer? - Huh? What?
候默 丽莎把你视为偶像固然不错
Homer, it's sweet that Lisa idolizes you,
但我觉得已经太过了
but I think it's gone too far.
你说得对
You're right.
告诉她她说得对
Tell her she's right.
我刚就说了
I just did.
我有五秒延迟
I'm on a five-second delay.
他俩互为喉中刺了
The kids are at each other's throats.
你不能又是我的狗又是她的 选边吧
Look, you can't be my dog and hers; pick a side.
你不能躲那儿一辈子
You can't hide in there forever.
我跟巴仔谈 你跟丽莎谈
Okay, I'll talk to Bart, you talk to Lisa.
我们得让这个家回归原位
We've got to put this family back in place.
好吧 为什么每次你都要在
Okay. Why do you always tell me
我快睡着的时候才讲最重要的事呢
the most important things just when I'm about to fall asleep?
因为我觉得夫妇之间的枕边谈
Because I think the pillow talk between a woman and her husband
是最重要的
is the most important...
什么 我怎么就到了教堂
What? How did I wind up in church?
怎么了 甜心
What's wrong, sweetie?
每当我快要读完一本很棒的书的时候
I've got that terrible feeling where I'm almost
我就会很伤心
at the end of a great book,
当我读完时 故事就永远结束了
and once I finish, it's over forever.
我想跟你谈的就有部分这种感觉
Well, that's kind of what I wanted to talk to you about.
过去几周 我和你度过了很欢乐的时光
You and I have had a lot of fun these past few weeks,
但你不会永远像现在一样
but you aren't always gonna look up to your dad
总是抬头仰望着你♥爸♥爸
as much as you do now.
等等 伟大的人啊
Bup, bup, bup. Great man,
无论你做什么都不会让我对你的尊敬
there is nothing you could do to make me lose one iota
减少一分
of respect for you.
我小时候 想成为那种人
When I was a kid, I wanted to be that guy,
但我现在都躲不进门后了
but now I can't fit behind a door.
你会发现我不是你想象中那个完美的人
You'll discover I'm not the perfect man you think.
好吧 我会读完我的书
Okay, I'll finish my book.
但永远记得你是我的老爸
But always remember you're my dad,
我也会永远记得你跟我在一起
and I'll never forget the way you and...
该死
Damn it.
我回来啦
I'm home!
她放下了
She's moved on,
面对吧 事情本该如此
which, let's face it, is the way things should be.
孩子们长大了 爸爸们去世了
Kids grow up, daddies die,
而风的低语在问为什么
and then the wind whispers, "Why?"
我不知道 我已经受过伤了
Oh, I don't know. I've been hurt before.
我不想靠近你 不想让你伤心难过
I don't want to mess you up by getting close to you.
我知道我们会经历酸甜苦辣
会有悲伤和欢乐
但不论何时人生将我们分开
你都永远是我老爸
还有 我拉粑粑了
没问题
No problem.
马姬 快来啊
Marge, get in here.
巴仔 因为我们也同样珍惜你
Okay Bart, because we treasure you too,
我允许你为自己做一件
I'm gonna let you do one thing just for yourself.
比如狠狠踢侯默的屁♥股♥
Kick Homer in the butt?
你为什么不好好想想呢
Uh, why don't you give it some thought.
狠狠踢丽莎的屁♥股♥
Kick Lisa in the butt.
每天开一次生日宴会
Have a birthday party every day?
再也不刷牙了
Never brush my teeth again.
在家里自学让狗狗教我
Be homeschooled by the dog.
开辆坦克开过史金纳的房♥子
Drive a tank through Skinner's house.
在地下室开家赌场
Open a casino in the basement.
来次婚外情
Have an affair?
-你还没决定啊 -别催老子
- You haven't decided yet? - Don't rush me.
把罗斯个人退休金账户改成401K计划
Convert my Roth IRA to a 401K?
来次婚外情
Have an affair?
重新打一杆
Take a mulligan?
好了 我决定了
Okay, I've decided.
我要狠狠踢侯默的屁♥股♥
I'll kick Homer in the butt.
你来呀 要是你能找到的话
You can kick it if you can find it.
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The Simpsons
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