生活大爆炸
The Big Bang Theory S10E12
Part 2
Oct. 7, 2019, 9:58 a.m.
We're ignoring the fins... Okay.
而且我不明白你为什么站在她那边
Yeah. And I don't understand why you're taking her side.
你是我女朋友
By being my girlfriend,
那表示她也觉得你是个怪胎
she's saying you're a weirdo, too.
我觉得你妈不是那个意思
I don't think that's what she's saying.
现然后呢
And...?
他妈就是那个意思
That's exactly what she was saying.
你能相信吗 我妈居然认为我们都是怪胎
Can you believe my mother thinks we're both strange?
简直难以置信
Absolutely not!
声音太大太心虚了
That's... too loud.
简直难以置信
Absolutely not.
闹了那么一出 谢尔顿和我
Well, after that, Sheldon and I
出门待了一阵子
got out of the house for a while.
我们先往我脚上涂了黄油 把脚蹼拿下来
Well, first we buttered my feet to get the swim fins off,
然后再出门
and then we went out.
你妈让你难过了我很遗憾
You know, I'm sorry your mother made you feel bad.
但归根结底 她错了
But, you know, at the end of the day, she was wrong,
因为你没有孤独一生
because you're not alone.
你说得对
You're right.
我有莱纳德 霍华德 拉杰
I have Leonard and Howard and Raj,
斯图尔特 佩妮
Stuart, Penny,
莱纳德他妈 伯纳黛特 威尔·惠顿
Leonard's mom, Bernadette, Wil Wheaton...
刚往你的大宽脚上涂黄油的女人排在哪
What about the woman who just buttered your big flat feet?
我是按认识的时间顺序说的
I was going chronologically.
你在库萨帕里他爸
You're right between Koothrappali's father
和独眼龙瓶装水男奥马尔之间
and Omar, the one-eyed Sparkletts guy.
别让这件事把咱们接下来的行程也毁了
Well, let's try to not let it ruin the rest of our trip.
我就知道我们从一开始
I knew we should've never mentioned
就不该把同居这件事告诉她
us living together in the first place.
她早晚会发现的
She was gonna find out eventually.
我不这么认为
Disagree.
人类1859年就知道进化论了
We've known about evolution since 1859.
她至今还相信诺亚和他的神奇动物园破船
She still believes in Noah and his amazing zoo boat.
如果你当时听我的话
This could have all been avoided
事情就不会变成这样了
if you'd only listened to me.
谢尔顿
Sheldon,
我知道你妈不会介意咱俩同居
I knew your mother was fine with us living together
因为我早就告诉她了
because I already told her we were.
你为什么会那么做
Why would you do that?
因为这是颗定时炸♥弹♥
This was a potential issue,
所以我提前下手解除
so I got out ahead of it
帮你把问题处理掉了
and I managed the situation for you.
你"帮我把问题处理掉了"
You "managed the situation."
没错
That's right.
所以我妈认为我没能力找到伴侣
So my mother thought I was incapable of finding a mate,
而我的伴侣认为我没能力掌控我自己的生活
and my mate thinks I'm incapable of running my own life.
不是全部生活都不行
Not your whole life!
科学那部分你没问题
I mean, science. You got that.
整理装袜子的抽屉 你世界第一
Organizing your sock drawer, you're the king.
但理解他人感受这部分
But understanding how other people are feeling,
这是你的弱点
that's a weak spot for you.
在这点上我已经进步很多了
I have gotten much better at that.
是吗 那我现在是什么感觉
Have you? How am I feeling right now?
什么 我上哪猜去啊
What the... How should I know?
兴奋 痒痒 好歹把第一个字告诉我
Excited? Itchy? Give me the first letter.
你和我是情侣
You and I are in a relationship.
你不足的地方我帮你补足
I help you with your shortcomings,
我不足的地方你帮我补足
and you help me with mine.
如果我背着你联♥系♥你老妈
How would you feel if I contacted
你会是什么感觉
your mother behind your back?
高兴啊 想不到你居然对我家人感兴趣
Delighted that you showed any interest in my family at all?
"高兴"
"Delighted"?
怪不得我猜一百年也猜不着啊
What... Not if I guessed for a hundred years.
-大伙 -我们来了
- Hi. - Hey, guys.
幸福小家庭到了
Hi. There's the little family!
-大家好 -大家好
- Hello. - Hello.
还有他们的夏尔巴仆人
And their Sherpas.
宝宝睡着了
The baby's asleep,
我们把她放到你们房♥间里行吗
can we put her in your room?
-当然 去吧 -需要帮忙吗
- Yeah. Go ahead. - Do you need help?
不用 我自己来
No. I got it.
窈窕奶爸 飞天保姆 跟我来
Doubtfire, Poppins, follow me.
抱歉来晚了
Sorry we're late.
没关系 艾米和谢尔顿正在说
Oh, it's no problem, Amy and Sheldon were just telling us
他们去德州的事
about their trip to Texas.
没关系
Yeah. Here.
我粗略地给你们讲一遍
I'll catch you up.
我们是怎么上的车
How did we get in the car?
打住
Stop.
他们把同居的事告诉了玛丽
Okay. They told Mary they were living together,
一阵唇枪舌战后 谢尔顿心灵很受伤
there was a fight, he got his feelings hurt,
于是他把内♥裤♥套在了头上
then he put underwear on his head...
他自己故意套的
On purpose,
而不是像高中时那样被恶霸故意套上
not the way it used to happen in high school.
我是故意表现怪异
I was acting odd intentionally.
真的吗 所以你可以控制你的怪异程度吗
Really? So you can control it?
好了 接下来发生了什么
Okay. Then what happened?
接下来就没什么了
Well, there's really not much left to tell.
我觉得我妈一贯把我当小孩子看
I decided that my mother views me as a child
是因为我从来没经历过青春叛逆期
because I never went through a rebellious phase,
于是我去打了耳洞
so, I got an earring.
我妈非逼着我把耳环取下来
My mother made me take it out.
艾米用酒精帮我消了毒
Amy put alcohol on it.
就是这样
And here we are.
我们错过了什么精彩好戏
What did we miss?
我就算想解释也解释不清
I couldn't explain it if I tried.
告诉我 谢尔顿戴耳环好看吗
So tell me, how did Sheldon look with an earring?
就像一个会帮同伴接网线的宅男海盗一样
Like the pirate who helps the other pirates connect to the internet?
你和莱纳德做了些什么
So what did you and Leonard do?
老实说 我们俩也是吵得不可开交
Actually, we got in a pretty nasty fight.
可能是有史以来吵得最厉害的一次
It might've been the worst one we've ever had.
天啊 到底是怎么了
Oh, my God, what happened?
我俩疯狂迷上了看《卢克·凯奇》这部剧
Well, we had started binge-watching Luke Cage together,
就像是我俩的专属节目
and it was kind of our thing, and then,
结果我发现她背着我多看了两集
I find out that she watched two episodes without me.
感觉就像我期盼已久的圣诞礼物居然只是袜子
It's like I was excited for a present and got socks.
我不明白这怎么会导致
I don't understand how that turns into
你们俩吵了史上最厉害的一次
the worst fight of your life.
我不明白袜子有什么不好的
I don't understand what's wrong with socks.
老实说 我们之前因为圣诞树
To be fair, we may have been on edge
就处于爆发的边缘了
because of the Christmas tree.
圣诞树又怎么了
What happened with the tree?
你扮小精灵还挺可爱的
You do make a cute elf.
是吗
Oh, yeah?
你还说斯波克的耳朵只适合参加动漫展呢
And you thought Spock ears were only good for Comic-Con.
我找到了一个农场
Hey, hey, I just found a farm
允许顾客自己砍圣诞树
where they let you chop down your own tree.
那我就会像是尖耳朵的大力士保罗·班扬
Oh cool, I'll be like a pointy-eared Paul Bunyan.
这个想法太蠢了
Stupid idea.
真正蠢的是一名物理学家
No, what's stupid is a physicist
居然不知道在挥斧头的时候
who doesn't understand when you swing an axe
你不能放手
you don't let go.
我第十次澄清 我的连指手套打滑了
For the tenth time, my mittens were slippery!
外面有21度 你不需要戴连指手套
It's 70 degrees, you didn't need mittens.
你明知道我很容易起水泡
You know how easily I blister.
是是是 怕撞又容易破皮
Yes, yes, you bruise, you peel.
感觉就像嫁给了一颗老水果
It's like I'm married to an old piece of fruit.
我们可以继续吵架 整晚都别想好
Look, we could keep fighting and let it ruin our night,
也可以停止争吵 试着挽救今晚
or-or we can stop and try to salvage the evening.
-好吧 -谢谢合作
- Fine. - Thank you.
莱纳德
生活大爆炸
The Big Bang Theory
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