生活大爆炸

The Big Bang Theory S10E05

Part 3 Oct. 7, 2019, 9:57 a.m.

So you're back out on the dating scene now?
对差不多吧
Yeah, yeah, a little.
肯定有意思顺利吗
Oh, that must be fun. How's that going?
我沦落到跟你共浴糟透了
I'm in a hot tub with you, so pretty bad.
或许我该向他的如厕时间表低头
Maybe I should just give in to his stupid bathroom schedule.
不别这样
No, don't do that.
-你不是低头了吗 -正是
- But you did! - Exactly!
我不想你重蹈覆辙
Learn from my mistakes!
早晨7:18 无论我身在何处
No matter where I am at 7:18 A.M.,
都急需找个厕所
there better be a toilet nearby.
按他的规章制度来日子就简单很多
It's just so much easier to give him what he wants.
的确可想想你的成就
Oh, true, but think of how much you've accomplished.
是谁让他不再给零钱消毒的
Who got him to stop Purelling his pocket change?
我
Me.
是谁让他可以往前座置物[手套]柜里
And who got him to put things other than gloves
放进除了手套之外的东西
in the glove compartment?
我
Me.
放的是棒球手套
It was mittens.
是谁让他尝了火鸡肉热狗
And who got him to try a turkey dog?
那应该是库萨帕里
That was actually Koothrappali,
但是我让他吐我手上了
but I did let him spit it out in my hand.
就是那你怎么能现在放弃呢
Look, how can you stop now?
简直就像好不容易等到匹诺曹
That's like walking out of Pinocchio
要变成小男孩时离开了他
right before he becomes a real boy.
你说得对
You know, you're right.
我也是这段感情中的当事人
I'm in this relationship, too.
我应该为自己出头
I need to stand up for myself.
当然了
Of course you do.
他要是不喜欢让他自己搬回来
And if he doesn't like it, he can move back here.
想搬回来也行就是得先找到好开锁匠
Oh. He can try. He'd just need a good locksmith.
你准备搭讪哪个
Well, who you gonna hit on?
排我们前面的那个姑娘买♥♥了草莓味
The girl in front of us got strawberry.
你的最爱
That's your favorite.
不行如果我们都喜欢草莓味
No. No, if we both like it,
那我下半辈子就会每每打开冰箱
I'll spend the rest of my life opening the freezer and going,
哀嚎着"草莓味没了"
"Aw, no strawberry."
那店员小姐呢
What about the girl behind the counter?
她一整天都在挖挖挖
Hmm? Well, she spends her whole day scooping.
一边胳膊可能会比另一边粗
One arm's probably bigger than the other.
有没有这个可能你压根就不想另觅新欢
Is it possible you might not actually want to meet someone?
你真是明智
You are truly wise.
谢谢
Thank you.
我本来想说你有着长者的智慧
I'd say wise beyond your years,
-可你年纪也慢慢接近了 -够了
- but you're getting up there. - All right.
说吧你到底是怎么回事
Come on. What is really going on with you?
佩妮我要给你讲一个
Penny, I am going to tell you a story
我从来没跟任何人说过的故事
that I've never told anyone.
好吧
All right.
当时我十三岁
I was 13 years old,
正值大学休春假
and on spring break from college.
没共鸣继续说
Not relating. Go on.
我提早回家
I came home early
因为他们已经没有能教我的数学了
because they ran out of math to teach me.
我懂他们也没有能教我的数学
Oh, now I'm with ya. Okay.
我妈妈当时去参加圣经研读班了
My mother was at bible study.
我走进房♥子本以为没人在家
I walked in the house expecting to find it empty,
却听到我父母的卧室里有声音传出来
and I heard a sound coming from my parents' bedroom.
当我打开卧室门
When I opened the door,
看到了我父亲和另一个女人在"结合"
I saw my father having relations with another woman.
-太糟糕了 -我知道
- Oh, that's awful! - I know.
所以从此以后我开任何门
It's also why I never open a door
都需要先敲三次
without knocking three times.
第一下是按传统礼貌
I mean, the first one's traditional,
二和三都是给里面的人穿裤子的时间
but two and three are for people to get their pants on.
后来你跟你♥爸♥怎么样了
Well, what happened with your dad?
我们对视了一下我跑回我的房♥间
We locked eyes, I ran to my room,
以后再也没有说过这件事
and we never, ever spoke of it.
可怜的小家伙
You poor thing.
自从我和艾米住同居后
Since Amy and I have been living together,
就一直像我父母以前那样争吵
we've been bickering like my parents used to.
你是怕会做出跟你♥爸♥爸一样的事
And you're afraid you're gonna do something like your dad did?
对我需要现在就给她打预防针
Yes. I need to prepare her now
-省得她日后痛苦 -日后
- to save her from pain down the road. - Down the road?
谢尔顿她只是想跟你用一个牙刷桶
Sheldon, she wanted to share a toothbrush holder with you,
而你却跑到冰淇淋店里想把妹
and now you're at an ice cream parlor trying to pick up women!
什么事被你这种口气一说都显得很蠢
Well, anything can sound silly when you put it in that tone.
宝贝与其担心未来有可能给她造成的痛苦
Honey, instead of worrying about pain you might cause in the future,
何不现在去弥补你当下给她的伤害呢
how about trying to fix the pain you're causing her right now?
你说得很对
I'm sure you're right.
我也应该跟你道歉
I suppose I should apologize to you, as well.
怎么说
Okay.
我这样直接把你剔除在外去找其他姑娘
That must have hurt watching me look for other women
你肯定心痛不已吧
without ever even considering you.
请你一定要理解我一直把你
Please understand that I think of you
当我保姆看
as more of a nanny.
赶紧把冰淇淋吃完我送你回家睡觉
Just finish your ice cream so I can get you home to bed.
不知道伯纳黛特的宝宝
I wonder if this is what it feels like
现在是不是这种感觉
to be Bernadette's baby.
不知道伯纳黛特的宝宝可还没有一个
I don't know. Bernadette's baby doesn't have a Jacuzzi jet
可以正中爽点的按♥摩♥浴缸
hitting just the right spot.
我的秘密爽点专用喷头不是给他的
Those jets are for my secret spot, not his!
你在里头都干了些什么
What do you do in there?!
干的事叫放松
It's called relaxing,
你只需要知道这些就可以了
and that's all you need to know.
已经很晚了
Well, it's getting late.
我们该回家了吧
Maybe we should head home.
你说得对
Yeah, you're probably right.
你不走吗
You coming?
走但等我一小会儿
Yeah, just give me a minute.
为什么
Why?
就是你穿着泳裤来泡对吧
Well, you know how you're wearing a bathing suit?
对啊
Yeah?
而我跟你恰好相反
I kind of went the other way.
你们两个混球自己买♥♥浴缸去
You jackasses just bought yourselves a hot tub!
你觉得如何
What do you think?
这个位置还不错
It's a nice enough spot.
如果我要为我自己出头
You know, if I'm going to start standing up for myself,
这种事刚好是...
this is exactly the kind of thing...
-我们回来了 -欢迎欢迎
- We're back! - Oh, hi! Hi!
你们好
Hello.
你们怎么样
How you guys doing?
挺好的
We're doing good.
我想谢尔顿有话要对艾米讲
I think Sheldon has something he would like to say to Amy.
我要为我今天的行为道歉其实...
I wanted to apologize for my behavior today. It...
完全没必要那样
It was unnecessary.
怎么位子这么热乎
This is warm.
还有我愿意放弃如厕时间表
Oh, and also, I am willing to forego the bathroom schedule.
真的吗
Oh. Really?
为什么她有这福利我们俩就没有
Why does she get that?! We never got that!
你是想让他回来住吗
Do you want him back?
真为你们高兴
I'm very happy for you.
艾米你应该知道
Amy, you should know
我其实压根没想去认识其他女性
I was never really interested in seeing other women.
为了证明我对我们有多认真
And to prove how serious I am about us,
我愿意将我们的关系更拉近一层
I'm willing to take our relationship to the next level.
艾米·菲拉·福勒
Amy Farrah Fowler,
你愿意与我共用一个牙刷桶吗
will you share this toothbrush holder with me?
我愿意
I would love to.
我们有必要来看这一幕吗
Did we really need to be here for this?
我可能是疯了可是好感动哦
Call me crazy, but I found it moving.