生活大爆炸

The Big Bang Theory S10E03

Part 2 Oct. 7, 2019, 9:57 a.m.

对不起
Sorry.
我应该留着这个万一生了个女儿呢
I should probably keep this in case we have a girl.
这小房♥子真可爱
Oh, that's a nice one.
是你小时候的东西吗
Was it yours when you were little?
我爸爸给我做的
My dad built it for me.
真有爱
Wow, it's so cute.
这个是老公这个是老婆
This was the husband and this was the wife.
他们会一起去冒险
They'd go out on adventures together.
游山玩水滑雪骑马
Cruises, skiing, horseback riding.
其实就是用胶带把他们粘在我家狗上
That was really me just duct taping them to our dog.
他们有孩子吗
Oh, and did they have kids?
有啊
They did,
可惜他俩不喜欢孩子
but the mommy and daddy didn't like them,
所以他们把孩子送到
so they shipped them off to an orphanage
我用鞋盒做的孤儿院
I made out of a shoebox.
听了完全不会让人担心啊
Yeah, that's not worrisome at all.
不是每一个女生都梦想当妈
Not every girl dreams about being a mom.
可能有时你觉得永远都不会有小孩
Sometimes you think you're never gonna have kids
结果某天醒来就发现自己怀孕了
and one day you wake up and you're pregnant.
哪怕自己的事业正蒸蒸日上
And it doesn't matter that your career's going great right now
而且从没有过跟老公被粘狗身上
and that you and your husband never even got to go anywhere
去游山玩水的机会
taped to a dog!
我居然为了这个翘了动感单车课
I skipped spin class for this.
他怎么能去这么久
Why is it taking him so long
不就从自动贩售机买♥♥瓶喝的吗
to get a drink out of a vending machine?
你估计很难理解
Oh, it's complicated.
他对推开那扇小门
He finds pushing that little door
伸手进机器里拿东西的亲密度感到不舒服
and reaching up into the machine uncomfortably intimate.
男士们我准备好开工了
Gentlemen, I am ready to work.
引用《火星救援》的台词"我得用科学大展屎威了"
To quote The Martian, "Let's science the feces out of this!"
我说的是《火星救援》这本书和同名电影
That's The Martian the book and The Martian the movie,
不是《火星人马文》
not Marvin the Martian.
要不也引用一下卡♥通♥《火星人马文》好了
Although to quote Marvin the Martian,
"我以火星的名义宣布这星球归我了"
"I claim this planet in the name of Mars."
你还好吧
Are you okay?
好极了从来没这么好过
Oh, I'm fantastic, never been better.
我喝了人生第一瓶功能饮料自我感觉棒棒哒
I had my first energy drink and I feel great.
你们想玩摔跤吗
Hey, you guys want to wrestle?
我们可以掰手腕掰拇指泥浆摔跤相扑
We can do arm, thumb, mud, sumo.
算了我们不够胖也没穿着尿布
Nah, we're not fat enough, or wearing diapers.
是你要他保持清醒状态的
You wanted him awake.
我们该只跟对方说话还是去交际啊
So should we talk to each other or mingle?
我不知道其他人上哪儿了
I don't know where everyone is.
是啊我是说
Yeah, I mean,
我可以想象他吃了一个或两个客人
I could see him eating one or two guests,
但吃光一群也太扯了吧
but not a whole party.
这派对有点失败
Well, I guess this is kind of a bust.
你们想走就走吧
You don't have to stay.
我要开始打扫了
I'm gonna start cleaning up.
好吧
Okay.
把他扔在这里我会很内疚的
I feel so bad about leaving him here.
真有意思我刚想扔下你时也觉得内疚
Oh, it's funny, I was just thinking the same thing about you.
听着
Hey, listen,
你能不能别把这件事
could you not say anything about this
告诉大学里的人
to the people at the university?
因为...
You know, 'cause...
你是如此... 而我... 这有点丢人
you're you and I'm me, and it's kind of embarrassing.
等等 "她是如此..."是什么意思
Wait, what do you mean "she's her"?
艾米是大学里最酷的女生不是吗
Well, you know how Amy's the coolest girl on campus, right?
-当然不是 -当然不是
- No. - No.
真的大家都这么觉得
Oh yeah, everybody thinks so.
什么
What?
你得了脚气就告诉我反而这事藏着掖着啊
You tell me about your foot fungus, but this is a secret?
我敢说肯定是因为我的男友是谢尔顿
I'm sure it's just 'cause I'm dating Sheldon.
老实说谢尔顿之所以受欢迎
Mm, actually, I think Sheldon's popular
是因为他的女友是你
because he's dating you.
现在谢尔顿居然受人欢迎了
Now Sheldon's popular?
到底是什么状况啊
What is happening?
或许我们该休息吃个午餐
Maybe we should break for lunch.
几点了
What time is it?
史上最烂的布谷鸟报时钟刚说两点了
According to the world's worst cuckoo clock, it's 2:00.
我的头好疼
My head hurts
我此生第一次这么累
and I'm more tired than ever.
你干嘛不回家
Why don't you just go home?
不我能撑下去
No, I can do this.
我...我只需再来一瓶功能饮料
I just, I just need another energy drink.
糟糕
Oh, no.
怎么了
What?
我想再来一瓶
I want another one.
所以呢
So?
那是一种渴求
That's a craving.
药物依赖的征兆
That's a sign of chemical dependency.
你才喝了一瓶
You only had one.
不我知道
No, I know,
但很多事物只要试一次就会上瘾
but plenty of things are addictive after a single exposure.
比如说可♥卡♥因♥ 尼古丁品客薯片
I mean, crack cocaine, nicotine, Pringles.
根本停不下来
You know once one pops one just can't stop.
你哪有可能这么快就染上瘾
You can't develop a problem that fast.
你要打赌吗这下好了
You want to bet? Oh, great,
我现在还染上赌瘾了
now I'm addicted to gambling.
我们没时间浪费了
We can't afford to lose any more time.
虽然可能没多大用但你们曾经试过
Well, this probably won't work, but has anyone ever tried
运起12成功力打他个茅塞顿开吗
to just haul off and whoop the crazy out of him?
这个建议完全没有帮助
That's not helpful.
虽然想起来爽翻了但没有实质帮助
It's fun to think about, but it's not helpful.
谢尔顿我们时间非常紧张
Hey, Sheldon, we are on a serious time crunch.
没有你我们根本完成不了
We can't do this without you.
拜托你别演大戏了好不好
Can you please pull it together?
抱歉我会好好振作的
I'm sorry. Yes, of course.
谢了
Thank you.
也请两位在我出现
Just, please, bear with me
咖♥啡♥因♥脱瘾症状时尽量包容一下
if I display symptoms of caffeine withdrawal.
没问题
No worries.
你们俩身上好臭
You guys stink.
抱歉对你发脾气了
Sorry I flipped out on you.
都是这孕期荷尔蒙惹的祸
I think it's just hormones.
我看你怀孕前就是一副晚娘脸了
I think you were mean before you were pregnant,
不过没关系
but it's fine.
咱们先暂缓收拾房♥间吧
So, uh, instead of cleaning out the room,
不如先决定一下婴儿房♥的主题怎么样
why don't we just decide on a theme for the nursery?
婴儿房♥还需要主题吗
Does it really need one?
当然需要了
Of course it does.
你小时候的闺房♥没有主题吗
Didn't your baby room have a theme?
我的闺房♥同时也是我爸的办公室
Well, it doubled as my dad's office,
他又是个警♥察♥
and he was a cop,
所以主题大概就是鲜血淋漓的凶案照片
so I guess the theme was bloody homicide photos.
我的主题是小熊维尼
Oh. Mine was Winnie the Pooh.
总之...
But anyway...
我们先从最基本的开始
why don't we just take a step back
先挑一个颜色吧
and start with a color?
颜色的挑选可就五花八门了
Right? There are so many amazing ones.
红色啊蓝色啊绿色啊紫色啊...
Red, blue, green, purple...
你是不是要把所有的颜色都说一遍啊
Are you just gonna name all the colors?
你这样我不敢说了
Well, not now.
房♥间什么颜色随便啦
I don't care what color the room is.
好好我只是想帮你而已
Okay, well, I'm just trying to help you.
帮忙个屁闭嘴吧
Well, you're not, so just drop it!
人家明显不开心了你为啥还不跟过来
I'm clearly upset. Why aren't you following me?
这就来这就来
Sorry! Sorry!
当艾米开始用铬酸和白醋的调和剂
And when Amy started using a solution of chromic acid