山巅之城

City on a Hill S01E04

Part 3 May 1, 2020, 3:46 p.m.

Please, Father, call me Jenny.
那你就叫我德莫特这样才公平
Well, you call me Dermot, then. Seems only fair.
"迪尔米特"
"Deer-mut?"
你有点口音但是已经说得很像了
Well you got a bit of an accent there, but you're close enough.
你有什么事需要我指点迷津呢
So, what dazzling wisdom can I impart you?
我
I, uh...
我不知道我想做的事对不对
I don't know if I'm doing what I'm meant to be doing.
我们坐一下吧
Let's have a seat.
你是指回学校继续修教育学位的事
You mean going back to school for your teaching degree.
是的我想
Yeah. I mean...
你有没有感觉到你的整个人生
do you ever feel like your whole life
都围绕着一个选择
revolves around one choice?
我并非天生就是个神职人员詹妮
I wasn't born a priest, Jenny.
当我跟朋友们说我打算宣誓时
Ya' know, when I told my mates that I aim to take the vow,
他们都以为我疯了
they thought I'd gone mad.
你有没有觉得自己错过了
Do you feel like you missed out
更好的选择
on something better?
是时不时会
Yeah, now and again.
当我看到年轻夫妇带着他们的宝宝
You know, when I see new couples at a baptism
来接受洗礼时
holding their baby.
我也想拥有那种人与人之间的联♥系♥
Yeah, I want that... that connection.
所以
So...
你后悔成为神父
you regret becoming a priest?
没有没有我自己做的选择
Oh, no, no. I made my choice.
我的人生可以有很多种可能
There's a million and two ways my life could have turned out.
但上帝只让我们活成当下的样子
But God only lets us live the one.
我们的职责就是找到这种生活的价值所在
Our job is to find the value in that life.
是的有太多事情都是别人给我做了决定
Yeah, I think I let too many things get chosen for me.
你想要什么詹妮
What do you want, Jenny?
我想要我的家人在乎
I want my family to care...
在乎我
about me.
我女儿以前都不肯放开我的手
My daughter used to, you know, never want to let go of my hand,
可现在她基本不跟我说话了
and now she, uh... she barely talks to me.
但这并不意味着她不爱你了
That doesn't mean she doesn't love you.
是我知道
Yeah, I know.
但是她充满恨意
But she's spiteful.
跟她父亲一样
Like her father.
他爸还酗酒
And he drinks.
她也不回家
She doesn't come home.
我不知道她跟什么人在一起
I-I don't know who she's with,
在做些什么
what's she's doing.
我
I...
我不知道怎么跟她交流
I don't know how to talk to her.
我连自己的女儿都没法沟通
How am I going to be a good teacher?
我怎么能当个好老师呢
I can't even reach my own daughter.
我们上次谈过之后我一直在思考
I've been thinking since we last talked.
来这里当志愿者你觉得怎么样
How would you feel about volunteering here?
来学校这里
At the school?
做什么
Doing what?
这里的老师人手不够工作超负荷
Well, the teachers are understaffed and overworked.
他们需要你
They could use your help.
想到霍尔布鲁克先生
Mr. Holbrook comes to mind.
他是有点无趣
He's a bit, well, dull.
但是你通过和孩子们互动
But you'll interact with children.
也许你就能想到
Maybe figure out a thing or two
跟女儿沟通的方式
about how to deal with your daughter.
杰克早就觉得
Jackie already thinks
我经常都不顾家
I'm spending way too much time away from home.
詹妮勇敢点
Jenny, be brave.
做你自己
Be yourself.
成为上帝希望你变成的样子
Be who God made you to be.
接着你的余生
And then the rest of your life, well, I mean,
也许不会奇迹般地按部就班
it may not miraculously fall into place,
但你能够坦然承受任何结果
but you'll be able to withstand whatever comes.
他妈的混♥蛋♥
Fucking motherfucker.
汤米
Hey, Tommy.
你去哪了我们找了你好久
Where you been? We've been looking for you.
该死
Fuck.
给你带了点东西
Got somethin' for you.
你就这么消失了
You just disappeared?
我去打炮了
I got fucking laid.
那不错
Good for you.
她叫什么
What's her name?
克莱尔
Huh? Claire.
克莱尔她长什么样
Claire. What's she look like?
就像棕色皮肤的辛迪·克劳馥
Like a mulatto version of Cindy fucking Crawford.
她穿了条红色的连衣裙天啊
She had this red one-piece, and-- Whoa, fuck.
我们一起去了海角
And we went down to the cape.
每年这个时候的旅店都很便宜
They got these really cheap hotels this time of year.
你从哪弄的钱
Where the fuck did you get the bread?
也许从你的角度你还不理解
Maybe you don't understand this looking the way you do,
但当你长我这样的时候是不用花钱的
but when you look like me, you don't fucking pay for it.
这是你永远都无法理解的
That's something that you'll never understand.
出了这么多事
Hey, with everything going on,
你不打算说说你要干什么
you're not gonna tell anyone what you're doing,
你要去哪里或是和谁在一起屁都不放
where you're going or who you're with? Nothing?
把窗户摇下来
Roll the fucking window down.
把窗户摇下来
Roll the fucking window down.
我伤害过你吗
I ever hurt you?
-伤害过你们两个吗 -你太大意了
- Huh? Either of you? - You're careless.
你太他妈大意了
You're fucking careless.
特别是你没吃药的时候
Especially when you're not taking your meds.
又和我扯没吃药这一说
Oh, fuck me with the fucking meds again.
你觉得我不想让自己好起来吗
Do you-- Do you think I'm not trying to get better?
你觉得我喜欢这样活着吗
Do you think I fucking enjoy living like this? Huh?
-真♥他♥妈♥会抱怨 -闭嘴汤米
- Oh, you fucking whine bag. - Shut the fuck up, Tommy!
给老子闭嘴
Shut the fuck up!
听我说
Listen to me.
没人在乎你为什么是现在这副德行
Nobody cares why you are the way you are.
你让大家紧张了
You make people nervous.
你让大家紧张得不得了
You make people too nervous.
我不能再保护你了
I can't protect you anymore.
听清楚了吗
Are you hearing me?
下车
Get out of the car.
你还有别的话想说吗
Is there anything else you want to say?
或许说说为什么联调局的人会盯上你
Maybe why the FBI was after you?
-那姑娘是他的妻子 -什么姑娘
- The girl was his wife. - What girl?
那个克莱尔她是联调局探员的老婆
Fucking Claire. She's a G-man's wife.
我没告诉汤米你被联调局盯上了算你走运
You're lucky I didn't tell Tommy about the FBI being after you.
因为我不会和你再见面了
Because I wouldn't see you again.
瑞恩太太
Mrs. Ryan.
多谢你的到来
Thank you so much for coming.
好多画啊
It's a lot of art, huh?
我让学生们去画一些
I told my students to draw something
能让他们想起家的画
that reminded them of home.
想看看凯瑟琳画的吗
Want to see Katherine's?
当然
Yeah, sure.
她画得不错
She draws well.
是啊
Yeah.
请坐
Please, take a seat.
凯瑟琳一直在课堂上睡觉
Katherine's been sleeping in class.
她的弟弟妹妹
Her brother and sister,
他们晚上不太容易入睡
they're a little hard to get to sleep at night,
我一直让她稍微晚睡一点
so I've been letting her stay up a little late.
她说她一直在做噩梦
She says she's been having nightmares.
是的
Yeah.
不过
But, I mean, that's--
这很正常对吧她是个孩子
It's normal, right? She's a kid.
这可能要更严重一些
This may be a little more serious.
她害怕入睡
She's afraid to go to bed.
什么你从没经历过吗