辛普森一家
The Simpsons S32E03
Part 2
March 1, 2021, 2 p.m.
Shouldn't you be in school?
上艺术课 我最讨厌了
Eh, it was art, which I hate.
你讨厌正规的艺术学习
Well, if you hate the formal study of art,
跟那个我打算讨论的艺术家一样
you're just like another artist I'd like to discuss
他也不被主流学院派认可
who also had trouble with the Academy.
你一定发烧了
You must have a fever,
因为这话题转换之生硬令人汗流浃背
because that segue was sweaty.
巴黎美术学院
一八六三年
缺乏想象力 无聊
Unimaginative and boring.
A
A.
苗浩斯 全在我的意料之中
Milhouse, this has nothing I haven't seen before.
A+
A-plus.
巴仔 你引发了我的思考
Bart, you've really made me think.
好大的胆子 F-
How dare you? F-minus.
踢我屁♥股♥
字面意思
Oh, a single entendre,
最最复杂的笑话了
the most complicated joke there is.
同学们 请坐好
Class, settle, please,
今天我们请来一位特殊客人
because today we have a special treat:
来自巴黎的酒神巴克斯模特
a visit from Paris' leading Bacchus model.
抱歉 我迟到了 作为超模
Sorry I'm late. As a supermodel,
我必须一直都吃吃喝喝
I have to be eating and drinking all day.
袍子敞开还是脱下来
You prefer robe open or robe off?
用这个核桃壳把你的私密部位遮住就好
Just cover your privates with this walnut shell.
绰绰有余
Whoa, so roomy.
你画得和他一点都不像
That looks nothing like him.
就该这样 我们在根据感觉作画
And it shouldn't. We're making the art that we feel
因为写实的话谁比得过相机啊
because we can't compete with a camera,
尤其是现代的那些自动对焦相机
especially modern compact cameras.
请保持17小时不要动
Please hold still for 17 hours.
你既然拒绝画静物
Since you refuse to paint the still life,
那你就做静物吧
you'll become the still life.
哈哈
Foie gras!
红磨坊
在卢尔曼毁了它之前 来玩吧
今晚真是越来越精彩了
This époque just gets beller and beller.
那个人是谁
Who is that kid?
我是图卢兹·谋特雷克
I am Toulouse Moetrec,
是《半世界》的记录者
the chronicler of the Demi-monde.
我把酒放在手杖里
I keep liquor in my cane.
有点浪费 真是有点
Not very efficient. Really not.
红磨坊
红酒炖鸡 炖鸡
Coq au vin, au vin!
这是我所见过的最伟大的东西
This is the greatest thing I've ever seen,
我见过大概五样东西
and I have seen, like, five things!
你 我的朋友 你是天才
You, my friend. You are a genius!
或许我们不该继续盲从老师了
Maybe we should stop slavishly following the teacher
我们应该独♥立♥思考
and use our own minds
盲从巴仔
to slavishly follow Bart.
以画架之名起誓
To the easels.
好了 是时候第一次了解自己的容貌了
All right, time to do my first self-portrait.
是时候第一次照镜子了
Time to look in a mirror for the first time in my life.
我想我一定非常英俊
I can only assume that I am beautiful.
好了 该照了
All right, here we go.
该看镜子了
Looking now.
红磨坊
别担心 先生
Oh, don't worry, sir.
我们这里的画绝对不会引人争议
You won't see anything here that'll encourage debate,
令人思考 或者不适于挂在牙医诊所
provoke thought or be out of place in a dentist's office.
我确信这一定会...
Ah, well, I'm sure this will have a definite...
我不知道... 什么玩意
Je ne sais... Quoi?!
皇上今天就要来这里赏画了
The emperor is coming here to look at this artwork today.
陛下他会送我们上断头台的
His Majesty will feed us to the guillotine!
好多年没用过那个了
That hasn't been used in years.
都没人记得怎么用了
No one even remembers how to work it.
把刀拉高 然后放手 这能有多难
Pull up, let go. How hard can that be?
亲爱的院长
Mon cher, le superintendent,
哪位学生的画会被选入皇家沙龙呢
which of our works will you be entering into the royal Salon?
哪幅都不会 你们全都落选了
None. You are all refusé.
那我们的学生贷款怎么办
What about our student loans?
会退给你们的 我们又不是野蛮人
Oh, they'll be refunded. We are not barbarians.
得了
I mean, uh, come on.
要是能让皇帝看看我们的艺术就好了
Oh, if only we could get our art in front of the emperor.
君主都喜欢对现有秩序的挑战
Monarchs love challenges to the established order.
不 但有一样东西
No, no. But there is one thing
是皇帝最喜欢的
the emperor loves more than anything.
-法国 -不 他讨厌法国
- France? - No, he hates France.
但他喜欢奶酪
But he loves cheese.
看看他任命了谁为土伦市长
Look who he appointed mayor of Toulon.
今日 1863皇家沙龙
明日 船展
有赢家了吗
Do we have a winner?
能不能别这么急火火的
Keep your pants on, Moulin Huge.
还有44个平庸画廊要评判呢
There are 44 more galleries of mediocre art to judge.
怎么有块奶酪
What is that cheese doing?
法国奶酪嘛 都能跑能跳
Oh, you know French cheese. Very runny.
我警告过他们不要用奶酪做轮子
I warned them not to make cheese into wheels.
方块儿还行
Cubes were fine.
我有晕动病
I get motion sickness,
而且乳糖不耐
and I'm lactose intolerant.
快点 他快咬进来了
Hurry. He's biting his way in!
怎么回事
What the...
又来了
Aw, once again,
我的奶酪总是假的
I have just cheese that is not cheese.
陛下 请您坐下来
Your Majesty, if you'll take a seat,
我们想向您展示一些非常特别的东西
we'll show you something really special,
不再是对自然进行机械复♥制♥的艺术
a transformation of art from a rote copying of nature
而是用艺术家的经验 想法
into the experiences, ideas,
和思想成就的艺术品
and mind of the artist.
光是"请坐"这句话就已经说服了我
You had me at "Take a seat."
我不懂艺术 但我知道我喜欢什么
I don't know art, but I know what I like.
我喜欢吃 和不欣赏艺术
And I like eating and not looking at art.
我特此授予你皇家奖章
I hereby award you the Royal Medallion.
您的眼光果然敏锐 陛下
Congratulations on your discerning eye, your Majesty.
我可爱这个学生了
I love this pupil.
这不是你从皇家沙龙开除的那个学生吗
Is this not the student that you expelled from the royal salon?
这 我
Well, I-- Uh, that is, I, uh...
无视我就行
Just pretend I'm not here.
先生 您伸舌头是因为您死了
Uh, sir, is your tongue sticking out because you're dead
还是因为在生我的气
or because you're mad at me?
两者都有一点儿
Uh, little of both. Yeah.
我猜那本书里没有适合我的故事
当然有 阿麦 瞧好
Oh, sure, Maggie. That's easy.
文艺复兴时期的艺术家们喜欢把婴儿画入画中
Renaissance artists love to put babies in their paintings,
尤其是小天使
especially baby angels.
让我们不要细想为什么天堂里
Let's just not think about why there were so many babies
有那么多婴儿 好吗
in heaven, shall we?
死亡之箭
丘比特之箭
死亡之箭
哎呀
妈的
Damn it!
你们在讲关于艺术的故事呀
So, telling stories about art, huh?
有没有关于一个胖呆丈夫配不上他妻子的故事
Do they have one about a fat guy whose wife is too good for him?
傻胖子
Stupid fat guy.
我敢肯定他连发生了什么都不清楚
Bet he doesn't even know what's going on.
听过迪亚哥·里维拉和弗里达·卡罗的故事吗
Well, Dad, have you ever heard of Diego Rivera and Frida Kahlo?
丽莎 我连杰克逊·波洛克和李·克拉斯纳
Lisa, I haven't even heard
这两位艺术家都没听说过
of Jackson Pollock and Lee Krasner.
迪亚哥和弗里达于1929年结婚
Well, Diego and Frida were married in 1929.
蓝房♥子
墨西哥城 科约阿坎区
我现在宣布你们结为夫妻
I now pronounce you esposo and esposa.
你们现在可以亲吻对方了
You may now beso quite mucho.
西班牙语的 "祝福你们"
Spanish for "Best wishes!"
西班牙语的 "恭喜恭喜"
Spanish for "Congratulations!"
西班牙语的 "妙啊"
Spanish for "muy bueno!"
朋友们 家人们
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