辛普森一家
The Simpsons S32E02
Part 3
March 1, 2021, 1:59 p.m.
接待镇上的精英们
at her lavish saturnalia party.
我好爱你的节日装饰
I love your holiday decorations.
它们让那帮讨厌的基♥督♥徒知道
It lets those pesky christians know they aren't going to win
他们必将在农神节战役战败
the war on saturnalia.
我尊贵的奴隶们
So, noble slaves,
你们想从我这位仁慈的主人这里要点什么礼物
what gift do you desire from your benevolent master?
还我们自♥由♥
Uh... Our friggin' freedom.
关于这个嘛...
Yeah, well, the thing about that is...
我们干嘛浪费口水问他呢
Why do we even bother asking anymore?
他永远都不会释放我们的
He's never gonna free us.
这事拖了太久了
This has been building up for a while:
你败坏了奴隶主的名声
You give slave owners a bad name.
什么
What?
大混♥蛋♥
What a giant jerk.
爸 巴提格拉彻底失控了
Dad, Bartigula's out of control.
看看他在对写书男托勒密做什么
Look what he's doing to ptolemaic book guy.
你为什么要抽自己
Why are you flaying yourself?
你为什么要抽自己
Why are you flaying yourself?
这是个有趣的悖论
An interesting paradox.
自♥由♥意志真的存在吗 还是...
For does free will truly exist or... Ow!
富裕和宠爱的环境
Growing up rich and spoiled
让你儿子变成了一个怪物了
has turned your son into a monster.
关我什么事
It's not my fault.
我又没跟他相处过多久
I never spend any time with him.
我儿子是个疯子 我女儿不是个儿子
My son's a maniac. My daughter's not a son.
我的奴隶出于某种原因恨我
My slaves hate me for some reason.
沉重的思维压在了
heavy lies the head
戴着卷刘海假发的头脑上
that wears the wig of curly bangs.
累了累了
I'm spent.
我现在只想在驴奶里泡个澡 然后直接睡觉
Just gonna take a bath in warm donkey milk and go to sleep.
真是难以置信皇帝竟然没有来参加我的聚会
I can't believe the emperor didn't even come to my party.
要不是你 他甚至都不会成为皇帝
He wouldn't even be emperor if not for you.
是的 你想让我做什么呢...
Yeah, well, what do you want me to do about it...
杀了皇帝吗
kill the emperor?
如果你想杀的话
Well, if that's what you want.
你可以用我给你的这个礼物来杀他
You can even use the present I got you.
我的老天鹅呀
Sweet jumpin' Jupiter!
你还想要什么
What more do you want?
我们之前是草根平民
We started at the bottom
现在是上流人士
and now we're one rung from the top.
该适可而止了
It's a natural stopping point.
你就那么不知足吗
Will you never be satisfied?
你在说什么呢 议员先生
Pardon me, senator.
我很遗憾你对我的野心嗤之以鼻
I'm sorry you find my ambition so distasteful.
别忘了
Just remember
权力只属于掌握它的人
Power comes to those who take it.
真舒服
Aw, yeah. Yeah.
奶 奶 奶
Milk, milk, milk.
敬罗马帝国
To the Roman empire.
愿它以一种奇异或者其他的方式永生
May it last forever, in some strange form or another.
现在再怎么小心也不过分
Can't be too careful these days.
试味员
Oh, taster.
有毒
Poison.
有人想杀我
Some has tried to kill me.
不会是你干的吧
You didn't?
反正不是你干的
You wouldn't.
让我找到凶手 无论是谁都将被...
When I find whoever did this, I will crush them like a...
皇帝死了
The emperor is dead!
谁来提名他的继承人
Who will nominate his successor?
朋友们 罗马人♥民♥们 同胞们
Friends, romans, countrymen.
是我
That's me.
我们应该有能够勇敢带领我们走向未来的皇帝
We deserve an emperor who can boldly lead us into the future.
我的儿子 巴提格拉
My son, Bartigula.
什么
Wha?!
他出身富贵
He was born rich,
所以他应该深谙经商之道
so he got to be good at business.
巴提格拉
Bartigula!
巴提格拉 巴提格拉
Bartigula! Bartigula!
巴提格拉
Bartigula!
于是巴提格拉的粗暴统治就这样开始了
And so began the reign of Bartigula the jerk.
急于让帝国开疆扩土
Eager to expand the empire,
他对海神尼普顿宣战
he declared war on Neptune, god of the sea.
尽管前期赢了几场
Despite some early victories,
但是伤亡惨重
thousands drowned.
巴提格拉将此归咎于
Bartigula blamed the troubles of Rome
外族侵略给罗马添的麻烦
on foreign invaders.
于是他斥巨资建造大型防御工事抵御外族侵略
So he built a large and expensive wall to keep them out.
这是谁建的
Awk, who needs ya?
你们这些该死的高架墙迦太基强盗
Ya Carthage-sacking aqueduct guzzlers.
最后 为了让言官们闭嘴
And finally, to silence his critics,
巴提格拉溶解[解散]了参议院
Bartigula dissolved the senate.
这位年轻的帝王为权力而疯狂
The young emperor had gone mad with power.
还染上了梅毒
And syphilis.
听好了 罗马人♥民♥
Listen up, Rome-wads.
我们的国家正处于危机之中
The empire's in crisis,
经济陷入困境
the economy's in the crapatorium,
海神尼普顿不知怎么把我们打得落荒而逃
and Neptune's kicking our butts, somehow.
我终于意识到...
I now realize...
我不能再做你们的国王了
I can no longer be your emperor.
因为我现在就是你们的神
Because I am now your god!
够了 我要站起来了
That's it. I'm taking a stand.
我的儿子才不是神
My son isn't a god.
他只是个名副其实的小疯子
He's just an entitled little psycho.
这个社会得醒悟过来
Society must come to its senses
推♥翻♥这个疯子
and overthrow this madman!
我不知道
I don't know.
你这是亵渎神明 把他抓起来
Blasphemy! Seize him!
就凭你的异端说辞 父亲
For your heresy, father,
我判处你被狮子吃掉
I sentence you to be eaten by the lions.
我们需要更多狮子
We're gonna need more lions.
我们怎么在这里
Why are we here?
他们说我可以带几件财产
They said I could bring a couple of belongings.
永远的兄弟
我们就是在这里许下自♥由♥诺言的 记得吗
Hey, this is where we made our freedom pact, remember?
就是那个你二十年来都拒绝遵守的诺言
The one you refused to honor for 20 years.
没给你们自♥由♥是我做的第一件糟糕的事
Not freeing you guys was the first worst thing I ever did,
但我在这里宣布你们都解放了
but I hereby decree you to be emancipated.
以自♥由♥之身迎接黎明吧
Now face the dawn as free men.
我们这是在牢房♥里 你这个傻子
We're in a jail cell, you dope.
父亲 我们得送你出城
Father, we have to get you out of the city.
快点 这样你还能逃跑
Hurry, and you can still escape.
不 我不会逃跑的
No, I'm not going to run.
因为你跑不动吗
Because you physically can't?
主要是的 不过也因为我们得阻止巴提格拉
Yes, mostly, but also because we have to stop Bartigula
拯救共和国
and save the Republic.
大伙们和我一起吗
Are you fellas with me?
不
No.
尽管他已经失去了一切
Though he had lost everything,
奥比西斯依然有着一颗战士之心
Obeseus still had the heart of a warrior.
好像有头大象从食人魔手里逃出来了
Looks like hannibal's missing an elephant.
没错
oh, yeah.
向永生的上帝致敬
All hail the living god.
我们这些将死之人
We who are about to die
向您致敬
salute you.
你居然敢让我看你下垂的光屁♥股♥
You dare show me your moon flaps?
我要让这个蠢老头看看谁的臀肌最强壮
I will teach this old fool who is the true gluteus maximus.
巴提格拉 不
Bartigula, no!
于是 在整个罗马城面前
There, in front of all Rome,
父亲和儿子开始了一场血战
father and son engaged in bloody battle.
巴提格拉很敏捷
Bartigula was fast,
但奥比西斯有一身肥肉
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