乐一通秀场（2011）

The Looney Tunes Show S02E25

Part 2 March 10, 2021, 2:12 p.m.

据我所知我是他排第三的挚友
For all I know, I'm his third best friend.
我得马上做出行动了
I gotta do something about this, fast.
那么如果兔宝宝是你的挚友
So if Bugs is your best friend,
谁是你第二好的朋友呢
who's your second best friend?
蒂娜
Tina.
第三呢... 是大肥鸡
Third best friend... Big Fat Rooster.
第四... 是飞毛腿
Fourth... Speedy.
第五... 我在彼得和蒲玛
Fifth... A tie between Pete the Puma
还有火星人马文中纠结
and Marvin the martian.
那我是第六吗
I'm sixth?
不是卡尔才是第六
No, Carl is sixth.
谁是卡尔呀
Who's Carl?
不清楚我在菲尼克斯机场碰到的人
I don't know, some dude I met in the phoenix airport.
但你肯定是我第七好的朋友
But you're definitely my seventh best friend.
不好意思
Oh, pardon me.
他居然这么有礼貌
Well, that was unexpectedly polite.
你猜怎么着他排第七了
You know what, that guy is seventh.
你现在排第八
You're eighth.
不等等老奶奶才排第八位
No, wait. Granny is eighth.
你排第九勉强挤进前十呢波基猪
You're ninth. Ooh, barely in the top 10, Porky.
我们居然还在一起玩
I'm surprised we hang out at all.
不过别灰心一切皆有可能
But keep trying, anything's possible.
嗨兔宝宝猜我是谁
Hey, Bugs, who am I?
"你好我能借你的浴巾吗"
"Hey, can I borrow your towel?"
不好意思达菲鸭专属笑话
Sorry, Daffy. Inside joke.
你能接下电♥话♥吗
Hey, will you get that?
你能接下电♥话♥吗
Will you get that?
这太好笑了
That's hilarious!
抱歉罗德尼你可能听不懂
Sorry, Rodney, you wouldn't get it.
这是我和兔宝宝的专属笑话
It's an inside joke between me and Bugs.
我们还有好多呢
We got a ton of them.
- 喂 - 嘿我是波基猪
- Hello? - Hey, it's Porky.
是你说到前门了就打个电♥话♥呢
You said to call when I was out front.
我出去拿信
Uh, I'm getting the mail.
达菲鸭让我想起了一个人
Daffy reminds me of someone.
我可从未遇过和他沾边的人
I've never met anybody remotely like him.
我们为什么要在车里谈呀
Why'd you want to talk to me in my car?
因为我们需要私下
Because we need to speak privately
谈一件很敏感的事情
about a very delicate matter.
我需要你帮忙摆脱罗德尼
I need you to help me get rid of Rodney.
你是说谋杀吗
You mean murder?
什么啊不是啦
What? No.
我要让兔宝宝嫉妒
I'm gonna make Bugs jealous
所以我们要假装成挚友
by pretending that you and I are best friends.
这样他就会甩掉罗德尼
So that he'll dump Rodney
和我成为挚友了
Sand make me his best friend.
你的谋杀主意也许也不错呢
Or I guess we could go with your murder idea.
我才不会谋杀任何人呢
I am not murdering anyone.
这又不是我的问题
Well, don't make me feel weird about it,
是你提出来的呀
you brought it up.
你为什么找我帮忙呀
Why do you want my help anyway?
你怎么不去找蒂娜
What about Tina?
或者排名之前的其他七个朋友呢
Or the 7 other friends above me?
波基猪呀听着
Porky, Porky, look.
如果你帮我这个忙
If you help me do this,
我保证你会成为我第五好的朋友
I promise I will make you my fifth best friend.
这可是飞跃哟
That's a big jump.
而且好好想想吧
And think about it,
如果兔宝宝蒂娜大肥鸡还有飞毛腿
if Bugs, Tina, Big Fat Rooster, and Speedy
都被外星人绑走了
ever get abducted by an alien,
你就会自动成为我最好的朋友啦
then you would automatically become my best friend.
除非那个外星人超级酷
Unless the alien was super cool,
那他就排第一你就排第二吧
then he'd be number one and you'd be number two.
这也比你现在的排名好哟
Which is still miles above where you are now.
好的我帮你
Ok, I'll do it.
所以你才是我第九好的朋友呀
That's why you're my ninth best friend.
- 计划是什么呀 - 很简单
- So what's the plan? - It's very simple.
我会用上专利手段
I'm going to use my patented
炸♥弹♥ 钩子还有锤子
bomb, hook, and hammer.
什么是炸♥弹♥ 钩子和锤子呀
What's the bomb, hook, and hammer?
我碰巧知道兔宝宝和罗德尼会在
I happen to know that Bugs and Rodney
今天下午去看电影
are going to the movies this afternoon.
如果我足够了解兔宝宝
And if I know Bugs,
当然这是绝对的因为我是他的挚友
and I do because I'm his best friend,
兔宝宝会问我要不要一起去
he'll ask if I'd like to tag along.
这时候我会扔下炸♥弹♥
And this is where I will drop the bomb.
我会拒绝他
I will say no.
然后我会说不能去看电影的原因
I'll tell him that I can't join them at the movies
是因为我有别的安排了
because I have other plans.
这就是钩子
The hook.
什么安排呀
What plans?
我会告诉他们我和挚友波基猪
I'll tell them that I'm already going to the movies
约好了一起去看电影
with my best friend... Porky pig.
这就是锤子
The hammer.
兔宝宝会特别嫉妒然后把罗德尼踢出局
Bugs will be so jealous, he'll kick Rodney to the curb
然后求我成为他的挚友
and beg me to be his best friend.
绝对万无一失
It's foolproof.
嗨我和罗德尼准备去看电影
Oh, hey, Rodney and I are going to the movies,
你要一起来吗
you want to come?
不了
No.
好的
Ok.
炸♥弹♥爆♥炸♥的时候我可不想待在车里
I'd hate to be in that car when that bomb goes off.
炸♥弹♥随时会爆♥炸♥呢
Any second that bomb's gonna go off.
而且他会猛踩刹车
And he's gonna slam on the brakes,
立马掉头然后求我与他重归于好
throw it in reverse, and plead for me to take it back.
那时他一定会超尴尬
It's gonna be so embarrassing for him.
你看他刹车了
Oh! There go the brakes.
好吧又开走了
Nope, driving on.
但是炸♥弹♥ 迟早会爆♥炸♥
But the bomb will go off.
我们只需要等待
We just have to wait.
我还是回家吧
I think I'm gonna go home.
随时会爆♥炸♥
Any second.
嘿老奶奶炸♥弹♥爆♥炸♥了和我说一声
Hey, Granny, let me know if a bomb goes off.
我去看电视了
I'm gonna watch some TV.
我喜欢的剧耶
Ooh, my show.
海军上将古德博格
Admiral Craddleberg is
正向我们发射深水炸♥弹♥
dropping depth chargers on us.
但我们是同盟啊他应该是盟友呀
But we're allies. He's supposed to be our friend.
船长我们快没有氧气了
Captain, we're running out of air.
我们死定了
This is the end. Ohh.
慢着时间旋涡
Wait, the time vortex.
对啊用时间旋涡
Of course, the time vortex.
我们可以回到受到攻击之前
We could go back in time to before the attack.
不我们得回到还要再前的时间
No, no, we'll go back even further than that.
我们要回到遇到海军上将古德博格之前
We'll go back to before we ever even met Admiral Craddleberg.
对呀我要穿越回
That's it. I'll go back in time
兔宝宝和罗德尼第一次
and stop Bugs and Rodney
见面的时候然后阻止他们
from meeting in the first place.
原来这么简单呢
It's so simple.
我只需要时间漩涡
All I need is a time vortex.
你在想什么呢
Well, what do you think,
我衣柜里有时间漩涡吗
I keep a time vortex in my closet?
我没有
Well, I don't.
它在车♥库♥里
It's in my garage.
而且你不能使用它
And you aren't allowed to use it.
所以现在赶紧走吧
Now, just get on out of here.
时空旅行可不能闹着玩
Messing around with time travel is serious business,
特别是对于你这种傻子
especially for a fool like you.
天呀说到时间
Oh, lord, speaking of time,
我参加家长教师联谊会要迟到了
I'm gonna be late for the PTA meeting.