乐一通秀场（2011）

The Looney Tunes Show S02E21

Part 3 March 10, 2021, 2:10 p.m.

Wow! I guess it really is the Year of the Pig.
波基猪是猪吗
Porky's a pig?
我一直以为他是海豹呢
I always thought he was a seal.
你确定... 真的准备好了吗
Are you sure... I say, are you sure you're ready?
这位老兄什么难问题都敢问呢
Well, this old boy ain't afraid to ask the tough questions.
所有答案我都写手上啦
I have all the answers I need right here.
你随便问一个
Ask me anything.
好吧准确来说鸭子到底
Ok, uh, exactly... I say, exactly what contribution
对社会做了什么贡献呢
have ducks made to society?
这真是个好问题埃默
That's a good question, Elmo.
我想他的名字是埃尔默
I believe his name is Elmer.
埃尔默吗我最好记下来
Elmer? Hmm. I'd better write that down.
卡罗尔你带了开场前的
Uh, Carol, do you have my pre-show
花生沙拉酱三明治吗
PR sandwich?
千万别让她辞职哟
Don't ever let her go.
这次她花生酱放太多了
Now she put too much "P."
你得赶紧炒她鱿鱼
You gotta get rid of her.
倒计时五四...
We're on in 5, 4...
祝你好运
Good luck.
我不需要好运我有小抄啦
I don't need luck. I've got these.
开始拍摄
And action.
晚上好我是埃尔默·福德
Good evening. I'm Elmer Fudd.
欢迎来到新一♥期♥《针锋相对》
Welcome to another edition of "Tit For Tat."
今晚的话题是鸭子
Tonight's topic: Ducks.
有请本期的嘉宾
Here to tell us why we should care.
达菲鸭
Daffy Duck.
达菲鸭欢迎来到本节目
Daffy, welcome to the program.
感谢邀请我埃尔维斯
Thanks for having me, Elvis.
我们开始吧
Let's get started.
准确来说鸭子对这个社会
Exactly what contribution
做了什么贡献呢
have ducks made to society?
- 过 - 您说什么
- Pass. - What?
换一个问题
Give me another question.
好的
Ok, uh.
卡罗尔把车开到前门
Bring the car around front, Carol.
鸭子很受人反感对此您同意吗
You believe that ducks are viewed unfavorably.
您有任何证据吗
Do you have any proof of this?
我想打电♥话♥ 求助朋友
I'd like to phone a friend.
- 您说什么 - 我想买♥♥个元音
- What? - I'd like to buy a vowel.
您在说什么呀
What are you talking about?
我还是再转一次吧帕特
I'm gonna go ahead and spin again, Pat.
非常时期得采取非常措施
Desperate times call for desperate measures.
你怎么不开天窗啊卡罗尔
Why didn't you open the sunroof, Carol?
你真的得开除她
You really gotta get rid of her. Ugh.
晚上好女士们先生们
Good evening, ladies and gentlemen,
欢迎来到皇家橡树
And welcome to the Royal Oaks,
格伦橡树奥克伍德橡树选美大赛
Glen Oaks, Oakwood Oaks beauty pageant.
我不知道参赛者们
Ahem. I don't know about our contestants,
但是我昨晚睡得很沉呢
but I slept like a log last night.
真的
Literally.
我是在壁炉旁醒来的
I woke up in the fireplace.
今晚我们迎来了众多貌美的观众
Uh, good-looking audience we've got here tonight.
我很期待能在
I look forward to seeing you all
泳装比赛的时候再次见到你们
during the swimsuit portion of the competition.
因为还会举办泳装比赛
Because there's a swimsuit portion.
并不是说观众需要换上泳装
The audience doesn't actually put on swimsuits?
我们明白的
Yeah. No, we get it.
这个笑话怎么样...
Ohh! What about the joke where...
波基猪拜托
Porky,please.
我知道今年是你的年但请让我...
I know you think this is your "Year," But let me...
不嘛我想听他说啦
No, I want to hear it.
我从纽约一路飞到这里
I flew all the way in from New York to be here,
天呀我的胳膊累坏了呢
and boy, are my arms tired.
我的老天呀太好笑了
Oh, my gosh! Oh, my goodness!
我笑得喘不过气了他的胳膊累坏了
I can't breathe. Oh, his arms are tired,
好像他没坐飞机
like he didn't fly on a plane.
而是用胳膊自己飞的一样
He flew himself with his arms.
他还当那是翅膀呢
Like they're wings!
可是他并没有翅膀
He doesn't even have wings,
他又不是鸟他是只海豹呀
he's not a bird. He's a seal.
海豹可不能飞呀
Seals can't fly.
从各方面来说这笑话太逗了
Ha ha! Oh, it's so funny for so many reasons.
波基猪你真是太逗了
Oh, Porky. Oh, Porky.
你的笑话也很好笑啦
Yours is funny, too.
但是波基猪更胜一筹呢
Just not as funny as Porky's!
天呀波基猪
Oh, Porky!
这简直是噩梦般的公♥关♥呀
This is a PR nightmare.
你就说吧
Tell me about it.
我们现在探讨的是这两个配料
I mean, we're talking about 2 ingredients here,
花生酱和沙拉酱
peanut butter and ranch.
她怎么总是搞砸呢
How does she keep messing this up?
别再说三明治了孩子
Enough with the sandwich, boy.
你看现在鸭子更不受欢迎了...
Look at this. Now ducks are even less popular...
情况比之前还糟糕呢
I say, less popular than they were before.
我们竟然排在大白鲨的后面
We're below great white sharks?
它们吃人呀
They eat people.
时间到了
Oh, it's time.
什么东西
What?
欢迎收看第六十三届皇家橡树
The 63rd annual Royal Oaks,
格伦橡树奥克伍德橡树选美大赛
Glen Oaks, Oakwood Oaks beauty pageant.
世上美女千千万万
There are many beautiful women in the world,
但只有一位能成为罗格奥小姐
But only one can be Miss R.O.G.O.O.O.
我知道了
That's it.
我们需要一只鸭子赢得那场选美比赛
We need a duck to win that beauty pageant.
我一直梦想成为罗格奥小姐呢
I've always dreamed of being Miss R.O.G.O.O.O.
不是说你我们需要一只母鸭子
Not you. We need a female duck.
好吧
Ohh. Right.
想都别想
No way.
拜托了嘛
Please?
我不是选美的料
I'm not the beauty pageant type.
你当然是啦
Oh, of course you are.
你经常去美发沙龙呢
You're constantly at the salon,
你每天花好几个小时梳妆
you spend hours in front of the mirror,
而且你总戴着皇冠在屋里昂首阔步
and you're always prancing around the house in a tiara.
那是你吧
That's you.
我倒是想去呢
Well, I'd enter it if I could,
但那只大肥鸡说不行
but that big, fat rooster says I can't.
所以就靠你了
So, you gotta do it.
我们都排到七十三位了
We're in 73rd place.
达菲鸭我不在乎那些投票
Daffy, I don't care what some poll says,
你也不该放在心上
and you shouldn't either.
你说得倒是容易
That's easy for you to say.
大家都喜欢你
People like you.
那你就变得讨喜一点啊
Then be more likeable.
那太疯狂了吧
No. That's crazy.
现在唯一靠谱的事情
The only thing that makes sense
就是你赢得选美比赛
is you winning a beauty pageant,
这样鸭子的人气指数就会飙升
which will skyrocket ducks up the animal popularity index,
我才能不费力气地
thus allowing me to enjoy respect and admiration
享受尊重和赞赏
without having to earn it myself.
我很有鸭握
It's a slam duck.
你是说很有把握吧
You mean a slam dunk.
你说什么我一直以为是"十拿鸭稳"呢
What? My whole life, I thought it was "Slam duck."
算了吧
Ugh. Forget it.
看来我必须得适应这种生活
I guess I'll just have to get used to the idea
每次我走进来时
that every time I walk into a room,
大家都暗暗期盼进来的是只大白鲨
everyone will wish a great white shark had walked in instead.
你猜怎么着大家
Well, guess what, people?
大白鲨可不会走路
Great white sharks can't walk.
所以你们无法摆脱我
So, I guess you're stuck with me.
好吧我参加啦