东邻西舍

The Neighborhood S01E13

Part 2 Nov. 27, 2019, 2:14 p.m.

了解一下女士们
Check it out, ladies.
城里最劲爆的表演
The hottest show in town.
今晚舞台上有你最狂野的幻想
See your wildest fantasies onstage tonight.
"魔力麦克"现场表演
Magic Mike Live?
什么让我看看
What? Let me see that.
就是一堆脱衣舞男
It's just a bunch of male strippers.
完全正确瞧
Exactly. You see?
我们跟着感觉走你的大腿就安排好了
We go with the flow, and plans will fall right in our laps.
今晚男人也到你腿上了
And tonight some men will, too.
再次感谢邀请我葛罗弗去别人家过夜了
Thanks again for inviting me. Grover's at a sleepover.
要不我就不能来了
Otherwise I wouldn't have been able to come.
真是太巧了
How convenient.
卡尔文你要吃点豆薯吗
You gonna get in on some of this jicama, Calvin?
现在正当季
It's in season.
很不幸
Well, fortunately,
披萨也当季
so is pizza.
太棒了没什么比
Man, this is great. Nothing like a bunch of guys
一群男人一起看拳击更爽了
getting together to watch a big fight.
我差一点咬完又蘸酱了
I almost just double dipped.
戴夫你觉得谁能打赢
So, uh, Dave, who do you think's gonna win the fight?
我不太了解这两个选手
Well, I don't know much about these two fighters.
卡马戈对左撇子战无不胜
But Camargo is undefeated against southpaws,
他比别人会切线
and nobody cuts the ring off better than he does.
但是普斯利
And then, Posley
个子高有三寸臂长优势
does have a three-inch reach advantage
下巴也很结实
and a pretty solid chin.
我看好普斯利因为我喜欢他的紫色短裤
But I'm rooting for Posley 'cause I like his purple shorts.
伙计们今晚有大战
Hey, guys. Big fight night.
看来豆薯正当季啊
Oh, I see the jicama's in season.
电视是怎么回事
Wh-What's wrong with the TV?
为什么都是雪花
Why's it all pixelated like that?
我不知道我付费了
I don't know. I paid for the fight.
也许是卫♥星♥接♥收♥器♥被挡住了
Well, maybe something's blocking the satellite dish.
马蒂修一下你就是搞卫星的
Well, Marty, do something. You work on satellites.
是但那是太空卫星
Yeah, in space.
那地上的更简单了
Then it should be easier down here.
我们出去看看
Let's just go outside and take a look.
我跟你说过就不该邀请戴夫
I told you we shouldn't have invited Dave.
这又不是他的错
Oh, he had nothing to do with this.
我没这么说
I didn't say he did.
问题就出在这了
Oh, there's the problem.
戴夫家的树枝把信♥号♥♥挡住了
The branch from Dave's tree is blocking the signal.
我就知道是戴夫害的
I knew this was Dave's fault.
跟我有什么关系
How is this my fault?
因为你没有好好修剪你家的树
Because you don't trim your trees enough.
残枝败叶就这么张牙舞爪着
Old raggedy-ass branches just waving around
跟二手车市场停车场前的充气偶一样
like one of those things in front of a used car lot.
这是加州橡树
You know, it's a California oak.
不能修剪这树受法律保护的
I can't trim it. They're protected by law.
这肯定就是
That must be why
警车一天来这巡三次的原因了
the cop cars cruise by here three times a day.
你好我是戴夫·强森
Yes, hi. It's Dave Johnson.
本地居民
Local homeowner.
我们这有棵树出了点问题
Yeah, we have a bit of a tree conun...
马蒂拿梯子来
Marty, get the ladder.
老爸你不能就这样拿着把电锯
Whoa, whoa, Pop, Pop, you are not climbing
爬到摇摇晃晃的老旧屋顶上去
on some old, rickety roof with a chain saw.
我会没事的
I'll be fine.
你怎么知道
How do you know that?
因为上去的是你
'Cause you're gonna do it.
我不去戴夫说了剪橡树是犯法的
No, I'm not. You heard Dave. Trimming an oak is illegal.
我这辈子都没进过监狱
I done stayed out of jail this long.
才不要因为伤害一棵树蹲局子
I'm not going in for assaulting a tree.
好吧那马蒂去
Okay. Then Marty will do it.
爸
Dad, uh...
我为了向你证明自己是个男子汉什么都会做
you know I would do anything to prove to you that I am a man,
但我恐高而且我刚吃了很多豆薯所以
but I'm scared of heights, and I just ate a lot of jicama, so...
行既然你们都不去
Fine. Since none of you will do it,
那就只有我去了
I guess I will.
不用了
No, you won't.
把电锯给我
Give me the chain saw.
真的吗 "我喜欢他的紫短裤"先生
Really? Mr. I Like His Purple Shorts?
是的这是我家的树
Yeah, that's right. Look, it's my tree.
我的财产我的责任
My property. My responsibility.
好吧去吧
Okay. Go ahead.
等等戴夫你知道这个怎么用吗
Wait, wait. Dave, are you sure you know how to use that thing?
-别怕 -天呐
- Oh, relax. - Whoa, man!
我行的我上去前
I got this. Now, before I go up there,
你们要帮我做两件事
I'm gonna need two things:
扶着梯子还有...
hold the ladder and...
替我放哨以防警♥察♥
...watch out for Five-O.
我不确定这个
I don't know about this.
你不确定什么
You don't know about what?
靓仔吗
Hot men?
这不是我的菜
It's just, this isn't my kind of thing.
我知道唐尼与玛丽
I know Donny and Marie
是点评网上实打实的五星好评店
are a solid five out of five stars on Yelp.
但那个帅哥有实打实的六块腹肌
Yeah, but that guy has a solid six out of six abs.
缇娜那是某个母亲的儿子
Tina! That is somebody's son.
这位母亲可把他养得真好
And somebody raised him right!
如果卡尔文知道你来这
But what would Calvin think if he knew you were here
被一群裸上身的性感帅哥包围会作何感想
surrounded by all these hot, shirtless guys?
他不会介意的我们家
He doesn't care. In our house,
在哪来了胃口不重要
it doesn't matter where you get your appetite,
只要你回家用餐就行了
as long as you come home to eat.
好了我上来了
Okay, I'm up.
帅气戴夫
Looking good, Dave!
他会死的
He is gonna die.
加油开工吧比赛还有五分钟开始
Come on, man, get to it! Fight starts in five minutes.
好开工
Okay, here we go.
它抖得很厉害
It really shakes in your hands!
或许我现在就该叫救护车让他们早点出发
Maybe I should call 911 now so they're already on their way.
我够不着
I can't reach it.
那就快下来吧
All right, then-then just come back down, man.
别冒险
Don't risk it.
或者踮着脚
Or get up on your tippy-toes!
就差一点了
I'm so close!
当心了戴夫
Be careful, David!
说真的这电锯可是新的
Yeah, seriously, man! That's a new chain saw!
就差一点了
Almost got it.
太棒了
Yes!
真棒
All right!
我说了我能行的
I told you I could do it!
那可不是现在赶紧
Hey, y-you know what? You sure did, man. Now, please,
快下来好吗
just come on down, all right?
好好但说真的
Okay, okay. But seriously,
你们真该看看自己的表情
You should've seen the look on your faces
你们还以为我会...
when you thought I was gonna--
爸不
Oh, Daddy, no!
老爹老爹
Oh, Pop! Pop!
老爹
Oh, Pop.
天呐卡尔文要不是我摔你身上了
Oh, my God, Calvin. If you didn't break my fall,
我现在可能已经死了
I could be dead right now.
我知道我也一直在想这个
I know. That's what I keep thinking, too.
你真的不想去医院吗
Are you sure you don't want to go to the hospital?
我没事谢谢你关心
Oh, no, I'm fine. Thank you, though.
你是问卡尔文
You-- oh, you-you mean Calvin.
不用我没事只是后背有点疼
No, I'm-I'm all right; it's just my back's out a little bit.
扶我坐下
Help-help me sit down.
慢点最夸张的是
All right. Easy. Okay, you know, the craziest part