东邻西舍

The Neighborhood S01E08

Part 2 Nov. 27, 2019, 2:14 p.m.

我妈给我们来了个意外惊喜
Well, as it turns out, my mom is surprising us
要从密歇根飞过来
and flying in from Michigan and, uh...
她比较麻烦
she can be kind of a handful.
她比较麻烦是什么意思
What do you mean, she's a handful?
缇娜缇娜那位女士比较麻烦
Now, Tina, Tina. The lady's a handful.
知道这个就够了过来
What else do you need to know? Come on.
就是只是
Well, look, it just, it's...
她是从小地方来的
You know, she's from a small town,
很守旧
she's kind of old-school,
还非常保守
she can be pretty conservative.
她有种族歧视
Oh, she's racist.
不是她没有种族歧视
No, she-she's not racist,
她只是会说一些大多数人不会说的话
she just says things most people know not to
因为他们知道那样非常无礼
because they're horribly offensive.
那就和卡尔文一样了
So she's like Calvin.
我怎么无礼了
How am I offensive?
你不是个无礼的人
I mean, you're not offensive as a person,
但是你的表达方式
but you know, it's, it's just your words
你的语气
and your tone
还有你的观点
and your opinions.
我只是实话实说缇娜
I just tell the truth, Tina.
这又不是我的错
‭It's not my fault
有些人受不了动不动就哭鼻子
that a bunch of little crybabies can't handle it.
我妈去年的圣诞信
That's actually how my mom started
开头就是这么写的
her Christmas letter last year.
宝贝我不是想让你觉得不好受
Listen, baby, I'm not trying to make you feel bad,
但是你的确不能和
but you know you are not gonna
戴夫他妈那样的人共处一室
be able to be around somebody like Dave's mom.
看来我今年还是得自己做饭啊
So, I guess I'll be doing the cooking this year after all.
缇娜不用
T-Tina, no. You know what?
不用你就坐着休息
No, you sit back and relax.
那天你就歇着好了
You're gonna get that day off that you deserve.
不行不行
No. No, no, no.
我们说好的已经拥抱过了
We agreed; we hugged and everything.
很抱歉戴夫
Sorry, Dave.
我拒绝你的取消邀请
I reject your uninvite.
我们感恩节就去你家过
We're coming to your house for Thanksgiving.
卡尔文那我妈怎么办
Calvin, what about my mom?
没关系
Doesn't matter.
我总是说
You know, like I always say,
他们没底线我还有节操
when they go low, I go high.
说得好说得好
That's right, that's right.
到时候我也会这样做
And that's exactly what I'm gonna do.
不管你原始落后的
‭No matter what your backwoods,
乡巴佬老妈会说些什么
whitebread, hillbilly-ass mama has to say.
这个天气真是太意外了
I can't believe this weather.
十一月份了
In November!
很不错是吧
It's nice, isn't it?
葛罗弗一年到头都可以在外面玩
Grover can play outside all year round.
太棒了
That's wonderful.
我很好奇为什么还有人
Makes you wonder why people are always
会在这开枪
shooting each other out here.
这里会有人开枪吗
People shoot each other out here?
经常的事宝贝
All the time, honey.
妈不是这样的
Mom, that's-that's not true.
都是从我的新闻频道看到的
It is according to my news channel.
我看的不这么说
Well, not according to mine.
你真的应该多看几个频道
You should really try to watch more than one of them.
那你看了几个频道
Fine. How many do you watch?
一个
Well, uh, one.
我带了曲奇饼干
I brought cookies.
就一块好不好
Buddy, just-just one, okay?
我们一会要吃晚饭了
We have dinner later.
你♥爸♥总是一吃就停不下来
Your daddy could never stop at just one.
上中学那会他只能买♥♥特别尺码
In middle school, we had to shop in the husky section.
但是你看现在英俊威武
Oh, but look at that chiseled, handsome face now.
宝贝你皮肤太干了
Oh, baby, your skin is dry.
你不用保湿霜吗
Are you using moisturizer?
我用妈我现在湿度刚好
Y-Yes, Mom, I'm sufficiently moist.
最好有防晒效果
Well, I hope it has SPF,
要是没防晒的话
because if it doesn't have SPF,
你最后可能会得癌症
you're gonna end up with cancer
和你舅舅约翰一样
just like your Uncle John.
我都不知道约翰舅舅得了癌症
I didn't know Uncle John has cancer.
他的耳朵都被割掉了
He had to get his ear removed.
但是一切顺利他找了个犹太医生
But it went fine, he had a Jewish doctor.
妈 "犹太医生"吗
Mom... "A Jewish doctor"?
是啊大家都知道他们技术最好
Yes. Everyone knows they're the best.
不过我听说现在印度的也很不错了
Although, I now hear the Indian ones are catching up.
奶奶你看
Hey, Grammy, look.
到我的学校了
There's my school.
这个学校很不错
The school is pretty great.
杰玛的工作非常出色
Gemma is doing an amazing job.
她刚开了一门新的课程
You know, she just implemented a new curriculum
培养小孩的共情能力
that teaches the kids empathy.
不错嘛
Oh, good for her. Oh, yeah.
那些小孩子还有一辈子的时间
The kids have the rest of their lives
学习阅读和数学这些东西
to learn things like reading and math.
他们学校也会教那些课
Well, they teach those things, too.
他们当然会了
Oh, I'm sure they do.
葛罗弗你知道密歇根的首府是哪里吗
Grover. Can you tell me the capital of Michigan?
当然
Sure.
Siri 密歇根的首府是哪里
Siri, what is the capital of Michigan?
密歇根的首府是兰辛
Lansing is the capital of Michigan.
至少他还有共情能力
Well, at least he has empathy.
爸很抱歉你跟戴夫的妈妈
Hey, I'm sorry, Pop, but there's no way
肯定会有一场恶战了
you're not fighting with Dave's mom.
骄傲的黑人族长直面
I know. A proud black patriarch going toe-to-toe
美国中西部大嘴巴老女人
with a loudmouth Midwestern grandma?
可以做付费点播的竞赛节目了
Man, that should be a pay-per-view match.
或者至少是泰勒·派瑞的电影
Or at least a Tyler Perry movie.
等着失望吧
Well, prepare to be disappointed.
因为我不会影响你妈假期的好心情
Because I'm not gonna do anything to ruin your mother's holiday.
相信我小子们
Trust me, boys.
母亲们是值得尊重的
You got to respect the mamas.
听你♥爸♥的他说得对
Listen to your father; he's right.
因为他知道如果他要毁了我的假日
'Cause he knows if he ruins this day for me,
我就要离开他投奔你们柯蒂斯叔叔和他的船了
I'm leaving him for your Uncle Curtis and his boat.
得了吧
Come on, girl.
你知道你放不下的少来了
You know you can't leave all this. Come on, now.
这里是你以前住的地方
So, this is where you used to live
这里是你现在住的地方
and this is where you live now.
离我很远很远
Far, far away from me.
我一直都很想你
I miss seeing you all the time.
我知道亲爱的
I know honey.
但你♥爸♥妈决定要搬到这来
But this is where your mom and dad decided to move.
或许他们能解释一下
For reasons maybe they can explain to both of us.
葛罗弗你能不能去厨房♥帮下妈妈
Hey, Grover, can you go help Mommy in the kitchen?
好
Okay.
北达科他州的首府在哪
What's the capital of North Dakota?
俾斯麦[德意志帝国首任宰相]
Bismarck.
等他上大学了你会感谢我的
You'll thank me when he gets into college.
妈在我们邻居来之前
Mom, listen; before our neighbors get here,
我想跟你说说可能你应该
I just want to talk to you about maybe being careful
多注意一下自己的言辞
with some of the things that you say.
因为他们是黑人吗
Is this because they're black?
是的
Yes.
你担心我会说出一些冒犯的话
And-and you're afraid I'm going to say something rude.
没错
Exactly.
-因为他们总是很玻璃心 -不是
- Because they're always so sensitive... ‭- No.