尖叫皇后（2015）

Scream Queens S02E05

Part 2 Sept. 10, 2020, 10:13 a.m.

right when she started her crazy phase.
我之所以和蒙什腻在一起
Look, the only reason why I got busy with Munsch
就是为了排遣不能拥有你的烦躁心情
is because I was bummed out that I lost the chance with you.
我说不好
I don't know.
你们确实年龄相当
I mean, you guys are more age-appropriate.
你知道你大了我三十岁左右吧
You do realize you were, like, 30 when I was born, right?
再说了我不知道失去查德后
Besides, I don't know if I can love anyone
我还能不能爱上别人
after what happened with Chad.
我需要缓一缓
I mean... I need time.
缓多久都没问题
Take all you need.
还是别太久了
Not really.
应该几个小时就够了
I probably only need a couple hours.
我在感情上没那么死心塌地
I have, like, zero emotional object permanence.
康复病原学医护联合医院
终于发生了
It had finally happened.
危险已经到来
The sword of Damocles had fallen.
我终于体会到了鬼王弗莱迪的感觉
I finally knew what it felt like to be Freddy Krueger.
因为我凯茜·蒙什正身处噩梦之中
Because I, Cathy Munsch, was walking through a nightmare.
蒙什医生您对这些谋杀案有何看法
Dr. Munsch, what do you have to say about these murders?
那一刻我的梦想摇摇欲坠
I knew in that moment my dream had been shattered.
CURE医院行将就木
The C.U.R.E. Institute was dead,
而我也离死不远了
and I wasn't far behind.
但一周后发生了同样不可思议的事情
But one week later, something equally unexpected happened.
医院竟开始蒸蒸日上
The hospital was thriving.
事实证明老话说得对
As it turns out, the old adage is true...
塞翁失马焉知非福
there is no such thing as bad press.
新闻报道谋杀案
News reports of the murders
为我们做了上百个小时的免费宣传
gave us hundreds of hours of free publicity.
全国各地的异常病例
And medical anomalies from all across the world
从四面八方赶来
started coming out of the woodwork.
他们甚至并不在意
And they weren't worried about
是否会被连环杀手杀害
being knocked off by a serial killer.
为了挽救自己的生理缺陷
Any risk was worth the miracle of maybe having
他们甘愿冒险
their horrible physical fates reversed.
-蒙什教务长 -什么事
- Excuse me, Dean Munsch. - Yes.
随着目前病人的大量流入...
What, with the current influx of patients...
这贱♥人♥ 我雇华芙护士好让自己轻松点
This bitch, I hired Nurse Hoffel to make my job easier...
也就是让她教我如何经营医院
I.E. showing me how to run a hospital...
结果现在这不靠谱的悍妇觉得自己无可替代了
and now, this pill-popping battle axe thinks she's invaluable.
这种数额的支出
An expenditure like that
应该经过董事会的同意
should really be run past the board of directors.
我会去看看的
I'll look into it.
好消息是我们很忙
The good news is that we were busy.
要面诊很多病人
So many patients to meet.
我叫玛格丽特·霍尼韦尔
Well, my name's Marguerite Honeywell.
我患了马凡氏综合征
I suffer from Marfan Syndrome.
这名字可真绕口
Wow. That name is really kind of a mouthful.
你介意我叫你"马凡"吗
Do you mind if I called you "Marfan"?
实际上我介意
Um... yes, actually, I would.
戴莉亚这上面说你2003年被确诊为
Now, Daria, it says here that you were diagnosed
莫比乌斯综合征
with Moebius Syndrome in 2013.
-对吗 -没错
- Is that right? - That's right.
我在网上做美妆教程
I do online beauty tutorials,
但网友对我的面瘫状况
and my total inability to move any part of my face
评论十分恶毒
is really getting savaged in the comments section.
不过有一起病例非常有趣
But there was one case that really intrigued me.
今天来你们医院与其说是我自己的主意
I must say that coming here today was not my decision,
倒不如说是我联♥合♥国♥的领导让我来的
but rather that of my employers at the United Nations.
等等你在联♥合♥国♥工作
Wait. You work at the United Nations?
好厉害啊去联♥合♥国♥是我的梦想
That's really cool. I've always wanted to go there.
我给外交团
I worked in the diplomatic corps
当翻译
as an interpreter
已经差不多20年了
for close to 20 years now.
我简直是健康身体的代表
And I'm the model of perfect health,
完全搞不懂为什么要我来医院
so I have no idea why I'm even here.
等等不好意思
Wait. I'm sorry.
你是瑞典人吗我以为你是英国人
Are you Swedish? I thought you were from the U.K.
不是我是明尼苏达州的
No. I'm from Minnesota originally.
你注意到了
Maybe that's what you are picking up on.
我老公说
My husband says
我听起来就像电影《冰血暴》里的人物
I sound like I'm straight out of the movie Fargo.
没法使用固定的口音
Inability to land a single accent.
太有意思了
It's fascinating.
我几周前确实滑了一跤
Now, I did slip and fall a few weeks ago,
被送到了医院
and I was taken to hospital,
但是他们说就是轻微脑震荡
but they said it was just a mild concussion,
下午就出了院
and I was released that afternoon.
你在说话的时候
When-when you're talking,
自己能意识到你说话的方式有点飘忽不定吗
are you aware of the way you talk sort of... shifting?
我说话就是这样
I speak the way I speak.
我不明白你的意思
I don't know what you are getting at.
我能说我觉得这太迷人了吗
Can I just say, I think it's fascinating
她讲着不同的口音
that she's doing all these accents,
但是没有任何一个会让人觉得不快
but she hasn't done one that anyone could deem offensive.
口音为什么每个人都在
Accent? Why does everybody keep
不停说我的口音我告诉过你们了
bringing up my accent? I told you,
我是美国中西部的
I am from the Midwest.
好吧当我没说
Okay. Never mind.
霍奇基斯夫人目前我们还无法得知
Ms. Hotchkiss, I am afraid at this point,
你是有问题还是没有问题
we do not know what it is you may have or not have,
或者有没有治疗方法但是我们保证
nor if there is a treatment or a cure, but rest assured,
会动用CURE医院所有资源
with all the resources available here at the C.U.R.E. Institute,
直到找到解决办法
we will not stop until we find one.
对吧同志们
Right, team?
这肯定不是洗便盆最卫生的方式
Hey, this can't be the most sanitary way to clean bedpans.
我是说难道没有法律什么的规定吗
I mean, aren't there rules and... laws and stuff?
几周前我还在负责给一个扎丹说
A few weeks ago, I was in charge of giving fentanyl to a patient,
要做脑叶切除术的病人
who, based on Zayday's recommendation,
开芬太尼
was about to get a lobotomy.
而且我们还往沼泽地里丢了一具尸体
Also, we dumped a body in the swamp,
所以我不觉得这地方有什么规矩
so I don't really think rules are a priority around here.
你好非医生蠢货们
Hello, non-doctor idiots.
抱歉打扰了你们的辛苦工作
I'm sorry to interrupt your hard work
洗便盆你们在本星球上
cleaning bedpans-- the only thing you're qualified
任何一家医院唯一能干的事儿
at any other hospital on Planet Earth.
你没头脑我需要你
You-- Dead Inside-- I need you to rinse and sanitize
清洗并且消毒这些尿管
these catheter tubes.
小心
Oh, careful.
有些还很多汁儿
Some of 'em are still sort of juicy.
我需要你筛选这些排泄物样本
And I'm gonna need you to strain these fecal samples,
放进生理盐水
place them in saline solution,
然后装进给粪便移植用的灌肠剂里
and then load them in enemas for fecal transplant.
不行我才不要
Ew! No, I'm not doing that!
不好意思小贱♥人♥
Sorry, Dr. Tiny Bitch,
但是克罗恩病可不会自己好
but Crohn's disease isn't gonna cure itself.
你为什么带着太阳镜
Why are you wearing sunglasses?
你昨晚喝多了
Are you hung over?
哌替定可不会让你宿醉
Pethidine doesn't give you a hangover.
所以我喜欢
That's why I love it so much.
但是它很适合用来缓解
But it's great to manage moderate to severe
看到你们这些不配在医院里的人
pains in the ass who don't belong
所产生的剧痛
within ten miles of a hospital.
我还需要你从1219房♥间那个昏迷病人身上
Oh. I also need you to get a semen sample
搞一点精♥液♥样本
from the guy in the coma in room 1219.
他前妻迫不及待想拔掉呼吸机
His ex-wife's just dying to pull the plug.
说他们的孩子不是他亲生的
She's claiming their kid isn't his.
我怎么能搞到精♥液♥
How am I supposed to get his semen?
我想你知道
I think you know.
回见贱♥人♥们
Catch you later, bitches.
受够了
That is it!
我不会再洗便盆了
I am not cleaning one more pooey bedpan.