尖叫皇后（2015）

Scream Queens S02E04

Part 4 Sept. 10, 2020, 10:12 a.m.

Me neither. But I know Mike Myers played the bad guy.
就像他拍完《反斗智多星》后出演的那部电影
It was, like, the movie he did right after Wayne's World.
总之这是跟你这套装束搭配的斧子
Anyway, here's the axe to go with your costume.
还有给我记住
And remember:
我在时刻盯着你
I got my eye on you.
香奈儿万圣节本该是
Chanel-O-Ween is supposed to be
一年中最神奇的夜晚
the most magical night of the year.
但今年的香奈儿万圣节我的生活支离破碎
But this Chanel-O-Ween, my life is in tatters.
首先我发现那个婊♥子♥蒙什教务长
First, I find out that whore Dean Munsch
继承了雷德威尔的全部财产
has inherited the entire Radwell fortune.
接着我看到了那个蠢货保安穿着我的婚纱
Then, I see that dumb security guard wearing my wedding gown.
然后我变蓝了
And then, I turn blue.
你在这啊
There you are,
你这个贱♥人♥
you bitch.
我知道这事有你一份
I know you're in on it.
你把查德杀了
You had Chad murdered
因为你不能接受
because you couldn't stand the fact
他要娶我的事实
that he was gonna marry me.
你现在还穿着我的婚纱
And here you are, in my wedding gown.
你不如直接签字认罪好了
I mean, you may as well have just signed a confession.
首先
First of all...
我美极了
I look amazing.
而且我承认我很惊讶穿上它的时候
And I'll admit, I was surprised when I tried it on
是如此的合身
and it fit like a glove.
因为咱俩体型完全不同
'Cause, you know, we got different body types.
我是"女人"的体型
My body type is..."Woman."
而你是"营养不良的维多利亚时期报童"
And yours is..."Malnourished Victorian paperboy."
其次
And second,
查德·雷德威尔是永远不会娶你的
Chad Radwell was never gonna marry you.
实际上就几周前
In fact, just a few weeks ago,
在我们的《美国丽人》角色扮演环节
during our American Beauty role-playing session,
他的原话是我们私奔吧安琪拉
he said, and I quote... Run away with me, Angela.
我一直生活在谎言里
I've been living a lie.
我不再爱她了
I don't love her anymore.
我只爱你
I only love you.
莱斯特
Oh, Lester.
我要晕过去了
You given me the vapors.
这浴缸里都是玫瑰花瓣可真好
It's a good thing this tub is filled up with rose petals,
这样你就闻不到我的屁味了
'cause that way you can't smell my toots.
吻我
Kiss me.
他这么说只是因为这是电影片段
He just said that because it's the plot of the film!
是吗
Is it?
我可不记得电影里
'Cause I don't remember nobody
有人说过他们要晕过去了
in that movie saying they had the vapors.
承认吧你杀了查德·雷德威尔
Just admit it, you murdered Chad Radwell!
你个傻婊
You stupid ho!
我没有杀人
I ain't murdered nobody!
杀了我宝贝的凶手
If anybody is behind my sweet boo getting murdered,
肯定是蒙什教务长
it's that Dean Munsch.
是她继承了雷德威尔家族的财产
She was the one that inherited the Radwell family fortune.
"可疑"的扎丹·威廉姆斯应该是帮凶
And she probably had help from that "Shay-day" Zayday Williams.
是时候找只说实话的老朋友
It's time to enlist the help of an old friend
-帮帮忙了 -谁啊
- who always tells the truth. - Who?
我的占卜板
My old talking board, that's who.
我们把查德召唤出来
We're gonna talk to Chad from beyond the grave,
问问他更爱谁
and ask him who he loved more
还有杀他的凶手
and find out once and for all who murdered him.
没人比维吉尼亚匡提科联调局的顶级毕业生
There is nobody who loves trafficking the dark arts
还要钟情黑魔法交易了
like this top FBI recruit from Quantico, Virginia.
婊砸算我一个
Bitch, I'm in.
香奈儿我一直在找你
Chanel, I've been looking all over for you.
不是真的在找你但我一直在想你...
I mean, not literally, but in my mind, I was looking for...
天啊居然是真的
Oh, my God, it's true.
你用一瓶子196♥4♥年前的铸造硬币
That you poisoned me with a bottle
给我下了毒吗
of nickels and dimes minted before 196♥4♥?
当然是真的
Yes, it's true.
这没道理啊
This doesn't make any sense.
我加入溶液里的银
The amount of silver that I put in the solution
非常少只有几微克
was tiny-- micrograms.
不应该这样的
This shouldn't be happening.
我觉得有人动过我的药物
I have a feeling that someone tampered with my mixture.
是谁干的呢
Oh, who would do that?
我需要解药
I need the cure!
银中毒是没有解药的
Well, there is no cure for Argyria.
什么
What?!
但本着这座医院的宗旨
But in the spirit of this hospital, gosh darn it,
我一定会找到解药的
I'm gonna find one.
不过接下来几天我都有事
Of course, the next few days, I'm booked.
我们有不少聚会
I mean, we do have the party and all,
而且我还有个激光手术预约
and I, and I scheduled an appointment for laser treatment.
去耳毛的
Ear hair removal.
我还得去干洗店
And I've got to get to the dry cleaners.
但我搞定这些之后
But after I get all that done,
我一定会给治好你的
I promise I'm gonna come up with a miracle cure.
蒙什教务长
Dean Munsch,
立刻将布洛克医生抓起来
I demand that you have Dr. Brock arrested immediately.
什么罪名
On what charge?
用银给我下毒
For assaulting me with silver!
而且很可能串通了迪尼斯·亨普希尔
And... probably being in cahoots with Denise Hemphill
用他连环杀手的手
in murdering Chad and a whole bunch of other people
杀害了包括查德在内的很多人
with his serial killer hand!
香奈儿听着
Chanel, look,
我知道你现在有点难过
I know you are feeling a tad blue right now,
但布洛克医生没杀查德
but Dr. Brock Holt did not murder Chad.
他有完美的不在场证明
He has an airtight alibi.
真的吗
He does?
那太好了
That's wonderful.
我也不愿相信这是真的
I mean, I didn't want to believe that it was true,
但是我银中毒了
but after the silver
而且我知道你嫉妒查德
and I knew you were jealous of Chad,
我不知道还能怎么想
I just... oh, I didn't know what else to think.
能原谅我吗
Forgive me?
就在婚礼之前
You know, he and I were having a little of the jiffy stiffy
我俩正在我的办公室亲热
in my office, right before the wedding,
也就是查德被杀的时候
right when Chad was being killed.
-什么 -我很难过所以我...
- What?! - Well, see, I was distraught, and I, and I,
我需要安慰正好碰到蒙什教务长
and I needed comfort, and-and Dean Munsch was there.
你一直在办公室里存放假发和胸衣吗
Do you always keep a wig and a corset in your office?
我就不明白了
Okay, I don't understand
中年妇女怎么老是抢我男人
how all these middle-aged women keep stealing my men.
也许是因为你做♥爱♥时喜欢用手♥机♥聊天
Perhaps it's because you insist on Snapchatting during sex.
就一次好吗
That was one time!
我受够了
You know what? I am done.
我不学医了受够了这家医院
I am done with medicine, I'm done with this hospital,
我受够了你们所有人
and I am done with all of you.
我要走了
I'm leaving.
不行在万圣节派对结束前你不能走
Oh, no, no, no, you cannot leave until the Halloween party.
我们需要很多诱饵来把凶手引出来
Because we need a lot of bait here to lure the killer in.
那就再接收点病人
Then take in some more patients.
我不懂如何管理医院
I don't know much about running a hospital,
但我知道如果我们接收病人
but I do know if we bring in patients
只是为了让他们被杀...
just so we can get them killed...
不不在凶手落网之前
Yeah, no, no, no, we're not bringing in new patients
我们是不会接收新病人的
until the killer is caught.
香奈儿当你的性格
Look, Chanel, I'm sure once you develop personally,
职业道德和身体都成长之后
professionally and physically,
你就可以留住男人了
you'll have no trouble keeping a man.
这里是完美的地点你要留下
This is the place to do that. Stay.
绝不
No. Never!
你们自己抓杀手吧我退出
Catch the killer without me, because I am out!
伊万卡·特朗普