废柴联盟（2009）

Community S03E16

Part 4 Oct. 20, 2020, 9:42 a.m.

Don't tell him, he needs to stumble onto it.
别告诉他这事他得靠猿粪
All right, listen.
好吧听着
The scenarios you run in here are like
你这儿上演的故事就像是
great... science fiction.
一部伟大的科幻小说
They're impressive and detailed and insightful,
令人难忘详叙其事立意深远
but they're not accurate for crap.
但它并非现实
Science fiction never has been.
科幻小说都是虚构的
Look at 2001.
就像2001太空漫游
Did we have a Space Odyssey?
难道我们真有奥德赛太空吗
No, we got snowboarding in the Olympics
没有我们只有冬奥会单板滑雪比赛
and we over-validated Carson Daly.
以及被吹上天的卡森·戴利
That poor guy. Yeah, cry me a river.
可怜的人对我都泪流满面了
My point is, your simulations are nothing more than anxieties.
我是想说你模拟这些场景只能带来焦虑
You're afraid you don't fit in.
你担心自己不合群
You're afraid you'll be alone.
担心自己会落单
Great news--you share that with all of us,
好消息是你愿把这些想法与我们分享
so you'll never be alone and you'll always fit in.
所以你绝对不会是孤单一人
And, yes, that's why I meddled with Troy and Britta.
没错所以我才撮合特洛伊和布雷塔
You caught me.
你猜对了
I was trying to make life go according to some script.
我本想让生活按某种规划进行
I can't.
我做不到
You can't.
你也做不到
We both need to get more comfortable winging it.
面对生活我们要学会随机应变
At least it'll be less work.
这样会轻松许多
It would cut down my Dreamatorium time by 18 hours a week.
我以后每周只在幻梦空间中待18小时
I could take up yoga.
我也可以练瑜伽
You've got the body type.
你身材很适合瑜伽
Now let's get you out of here.
我们想办法把你弄出去吧
I don't know how.
我不知该怎么办
These fake shackles don't have a fake key.
这些幻梦手铐可没有匹配的钥匙
Isn't that what a... quantum spanner's for?
所以量子扳手就派上用场了
Technically, no.
理论上说不对
But that's fine.
但就这样吧
So should we get back to lunch?
一起回去吃午饭吧
I guess so.
好的
A little more anticlimactic than I would have simulated it,
不过这次环境模拟有点虎头蛇尾
But whatever. Anticlimactic?
就这样吧虎头蛇尾
Render environment observo-deck,
渲染环境飞船操控中心
H.M.S. spacetime 12.
时空飞船12号♥
Inspector, set the tachyon drive to hyperjump.
探长激活超光速加速器准备时空跳跃
We must get to the other side of this star field
我们要在河蟹战警追上前
before the Blorgons intercept.
抵达星空的另一端
Blorgons in this sector?
这片区域的河蟹战警吗
Well, this mission has gone pear-shaped, indeed.
这次行动已经完全失控了
Prepare to hyperjump on my mark.
听我命令准备时空跳跃
Bugger the dovecoats, inspector.
探长穿铁皮的河蟹战警来了
We're too late! Blorgons!
我们慢了一步河蟹来了
Eradicate! Eradicate!
斩草除根斩草除根
Our quantum blasters are useless against their armor.
量子波打不透他们的盔甲
We're as cooked as Lord Nelson's mutton, we are.
我们这下死定了万劫不复了
Not if I can help it.
我要出马解决这一切
I'll see you on the other side inspector...wherever that is.
在星空的另一端见探长不论何地
Don't you mean "Whenever that is"?
你是不是想说"不论何时"
Take that, Blorgon scum!
尝尝这个河蟹渣渣
You'll blo-gon me for this later.
瞧我把你河蟹个精光
Ow, Annie!
安妮
Oh, oh, my God!
我的天呐
Abed, I'm so sorry.
阿布蒂太对不起了
No, no, you're committing.
没你很是投入
This is good stuff.
干得不错
Thanks.
谢谢
I am Abed Nadir...
我是阿布蒂·纳德尔
And I don't know a lot of things everyone else knows.
大家都通晓的东西很多我都一无所知
I wander the universe with my friend, Troy,
我与伙伴特洛伊一同在宇宙中穿行
doing whatever I want.
随心所欲
Sometimes accidentally hurting innocent unremarkables.
有时会不小心伤到无辜路人甲乙丙丁
This week, however, Troy went to lunch and I adapted.
这周特洛伊去吃午饭我便见机行事
I now have the ability to enter the minds of others.
现在我有了解读他人思想的能力
I'm hungry, are you hungry? Yeah.
我好饿啊你饿了吗当然了
I'll make us buttered noodles.
我去煮点黄油意面
Using an elusive new technique known as "Empathy".
用的是"同理心"这一难以捉摸的新招
So was the other fast food place worth the drive, Shirley?
费那么大工夫开车去那家店值吗雪瑞
You know, half way there I thought, "What am I doing?
走到一半我就想"我这是在干吗啊"
It's the same fast food place in a different location.
只不过换了个地还是一样的快餐
Have the margins of my life become so narrow?"
我何时变得如此眼光短浅了
So I went to the mall and had pizza.
于是我去商场买♥♥了块披萨吃
I be the matrix today.
我今天够波折吧
Sounds like this has been a game-changing day for all of us.
看来今天对所有人来说都是转折点啊
I almost sat on my balls,
我差点坐到自己的蛋蛋
but at the last second, I made an adjustment.
不过最后一秒我侧了侧身
Good job! Good work.
好样的干得好
Good job, man.
好样的伙计
Well, we had a good lunch, too.
我们的午餐也很愉快
Yeah.
可不嘛
I spoke to the manager about Die Hard,
我跟餐厅经理就《虎胆龙威》做了交涉
And I told him he should be ashamed of himself.
我告诉他他应该为自己感到羞耻
Thanks.
谢了
Sorry I bailed on the Dreamatorium.
很抱歉我今天没去幻梦空间
It's okay, Annie did pretty good in a pinch.
没关系我和安妮成功化险为夷
All right, back to cramming?
好了继续温书吧
The people at the bank loved my outfit.
银行那边的人喜欢我这身打扮
And they had all kinds of questions about it
他们问了各种问题
and my answers seemed to amuse and
我的回答让他们很开心
and even liberate them a little.
甚至是解放了他们的思想
A few of us went to lunch
我和一些人共进午餐
and I had the deepest conversation of my life.
我们进行了有生以来最为深刻的谈话
I gotta go, I'm telling everybody.
伙计们我得走了
Hmm, maybe after a long, dark night,
也许漫漫长夜过后
the sun is starting to rise on Greendale.
太阳终要在格林德尔上方升起了
Maybe. Maybe not.
也许吧也许不会
You never can tell what kind of day you're gonna have.
你永远无法写定将来的日子
Okay, I didn't really avoid sitting on them.
好吧我其实坐到了蛋上
I...sat right on them.
直直地坐了上去
I'm sorry. Pierce, I'm sorry.
真可怜皮尔斯我很抱歉
Hurt like hell.
疼死爹了
I saw eagles.
我都眼冒金星了
Troy and Abed in the morning
特洛伊和阿布蒂的早间秀
Today we're joined by Annie Edison... Hi!
今天我们请到了安妮·埃迪生大家好
Who's gonna show us how to spruce up your apartment on a budget.
她将教大家如何用最少的钱装饰自己的公♥寓♥
So, Annie, what inspired this throw?
那么安妮你这想法是怎么来的
Well, I just thought that I'd cover up the stain
我是想到了我要清理干净
where Abed spilled code red on the couch last week.
阿布蒂上周在沙发留下的鲜红点点
Oops. Crafty.
真机灵啊
And you have some tips on entertaining.
而且你要在款待客人方面支些招
Yes, if you're expecting company,
没错如果家里有人造访
but you don't have enough chairs,
然而椅子却不够
you can bring out pillows from your bedroom
你可以把卧室里的枕头拿来
and use them on the floor for a Moroccan feel.
铺在地上坐很有摩洛哥感觉哦
Ooh, a taste of the orient.
很有东方风韵
Actually, boys, I have a little surprise for you.
伙计们我为你们准备了惊喜
While you two were out playing blazer tag...
趁你们玩运动枪的时候准备的
That's laser tag with sport coats.
那是穿运动服玩激光枪
I did a little extreme bedroom makeover!
我给卧室来了个大改造
I unbunked your beds and got scrap fabric and--
我把上下铺拆开了弄了些布料
It's okay, buddy.
伙计没啥的
We can put it back.
我们可以恢复回来
We can put it back the way it was.
可以按原样恢复回来
I'm so sorry. It's okay.
太抱歉了没关系
It's--cut, Garrett.
快切掉加瑞特
Sorry!
抱歉