废柴联盟（2009）

Community S03E14

Part 2 Oct. 20, 2020, 9:42 a.m.

Citing that Abed is weirder and more foreign.
因为阿布蒂性格更怪家乡也更遥远
Shirley Bennett decides her allegiance
雪瑞·伯纳德在给丈夫的短♥信♥里
in a text message to her husband.
表明了自己的立场
I'll be home late, sugar boots.
达令我要晚点回家
Abed hurt Troy's feelings by being a robot.
阿布蒂这个冷血动物伤了特洛伊的心
Need to stay with my boy to make sure
我得陪在他身边
Britta doesn't put him on the weed.
谨防布雷塔唆使他吸大♥麻♥
Please record Forensic Files.
记得录下《法医档案》哦
Troy appoints Shirley Bennett
特洛伊任命雪瑞·伯纳德
as his second-in-command, at which point,
为其副指挥官有鉴于此
Pierce switches to Abed's side.
皮尔斯叛变到了阿布蒂阵营
There were those who thought that midnight might come and go,
有些人以为就算午夜来临
and nothing would happen.
也不会有什么事
Well, I was in Korea, and I knew the sound of crap
但我上过朝鲜战场那山雨欲来的声音
when it was about to hit the fan.
我再熟悉不过
You know what it sounded like?
知道是什么样的动静吗
That's right, Jackson.
没错杰克逊
Silence.
一片死寂
Midnight comes, and a campus holds its breath.
午夜来临整个校园的人都屏气凝神
I know there's a lot of blanket stackers and pillow packers out there
我知道毯子军团和枕头部队都有不少人
thinking it's going to go down tonight.
觉得熬不过今晚了
But there's a lot of us folks from the scene in between
但我们中间派还有很多人
saying, "Hey, we're all looking to chill out
心里正想着"闹剧早点结束
and lay down with someone special."
回家老婆孩子热炕头咯"
This is real Neil with pipes of steel,
我是钢管真♥相♥帝尼尔
signing off with the smooth sounds
伴随着柔和的拂晓之音
of daybreak.
我们下次再见
I gotta get this on film.
一定要把这段录下
I am straight trouncing spaz in Go Fish.
我赢定了摸底技术太好了
Dude, what are you doing?
老兄你干啥呢
Don't record this.
别录了
Come on!
别这样
Wait, did you hear that?
你听见了吗
What the hell is that?
什么玩意儿
12:07 A.M.
凌晨零点零七分
Blanketsburg soldiers charge a pillow fort in the library.
毯子军团士兵攻向图书馆的枕头城♥堡♥
The pillowtonians move quickly to defend.
枕头部队迅速前往防御
There were no rules in that first battle.
那一仗打得毫无章法
You hit someone, and if they went down,
见人就打对方倒下了
you stop hitting them.
你就收手
Call that common courtesy.
这算是基本礼节吧
Then what if they get up?
要是倒下又爬起来呢
Do you maybe keep hitting them till they learn to stay down?
你会不会一直打到他爬不起来呢
We call that common sense.
这就叫基本常识
The battle lasts six minutes.
战斗持续了六分钟
No territory changes hands.
双方互无攻陷
Blanketsburg has drawn first blood.
毯子军团首开杀戒
Pillowtown will draw first blood part II.
第二部枕头部队血洗敌方
Citizens of Blanketsburg, I ask you now
毯子堡人♥民♥ 我在此号♥召
to prepare for war.
大家准备战斗
And I ask Garrett to please fix the microphone on my laptop.
另外请加瑞立即修好我笔记本上的麦克风
it's doing that thing again.
它老♥毛♥病又犯了
The United Forts of Pillowtown
枕头城联邦堡
and the Legit Republic of Blanketsburg
和毯子堡共和城
are at war,
开战了
Each side attempting to kick down and replace the other.
双边都想攻陷对方占据阵地
The unmoving line between them
这条羊毛漫天飞的烽火战线上
is a campus-wide, fleece-laden strip
充斥着枕头与枕头的碰撞
of pillow-to-pillow combat.
你来我往互不相让
Britta Perry attempts to capture
布雷塔·派利想要用胶片
the war's sublime indignities on film.
捕捉到战争最卑劣的一面
Unfortunately for Britta
可惜呀在此奉劝布雷塔
and millions of photographers like her,
以及另外几百万跟她一样的拍客
just because something is in black and white
别以为把照片拍成黑白的
doesn't mean it's good.
就是牛逼的照片
Rules are agreed upon, but casualties are inevitable.
尽管有约在先但伤亡在所难免
Outside the science lab,
科学实验室门外
at the battle of big bulletin board,
公报栏一役
Pierce Hawthorne suffers broken glasses,
皮尔斯·霍桑眼镜碎裂
A hurt finger, and erectile dysfunction,
手指受伤勃起不能
which, in his words, had never happened ever Before that battle.
据他所言此前他从未有过此类问题
Pillows, but no sleep.
枕头遍地却无安睡
Feathers, but no birds.
羽毛漫天却无鸟雀
Pajamas without children.
身着睡衣不是童颜
Violence without purpose.
激烈暴♥动♥ 不知何为
I saw mommy kissing exxon mobil.
眼见妈咪亲吻埃克森美孚[美国炼油公♥司♥]
Amanda Johnson.
阿曼达·约翰逊
Poet by choice, lesbian by birth.
吟诗作对皆自愿蕾丝百合本天生
Even Jeff Winger, who, before the war,
就连杰夫·翁格这个战前
lacked interest in it, has now found a leading role.
对战事毫无兴趣的人也成长为了军事领袖
Soldiers of Blanketsburg,
毯子堡的士兵们
we fight not because we want war.
我们不是为了战争而战争
We fight,
战争
That we might gain peace!
是为了赢得和平
Winger's critics suggest
有批评者指出
He merely improvised hot-button patriotic dogma
他煽风点火鼓动狂热爱国主义情怀
in a Ferris Buellerian attempt to delay schoolwork.
是为了逃避作业就像《春天不是读书天》里一样
Winger decries the accusation as,
对于这种批评翁格公开谴责道
"A slanderous betrayal akin to 9/11."
"这种造谣中伤无异于911"
Later after the war,
战争结束后
he would refer to the theory as "Essentially accurate."
他又会改口称其"基本正确"
Annie Edison provides humanitarian relief For both sides.
安妮·埃迪生为敌对双方提供人道救援
Her text conversations with Jeff Winger give us a glimpse
从她与杰夫·翁格的短♥信♥对话中
beneath the cushions of war to the lost pennies
我们可以窥见在枕垫战争之下
and grody q-tips of war's emotional toll.
因战争情感创伤而耗费的钱财和棉签
Jeff, heard from one of Troy's soldiers about a speech
杰夫我听特洛伊那边的一个士兵
you gave to troops at the blanket fort.
说起了你在毯子堡发表的演说
Wish this war could be over.
希望战争早点结束
But proud of you for taking a stance.
但你能站出来我为你骄傲
Text message.
短♥信♥
Annie Edison.
安妮·埃迪生
Thank you, Annie.
谢谢安妮
I'm proud of you too and of us all.
我也为你和大家感到骄傲
Also with the nightmare would end.
我也希望噩梦早点结束
But using what I'm given to give what I can.
但在此之前我会尽力而为
Jeff Winger.
杰夫·翁格
Jeff, just heard from one of Abed's soldiers
杰夫我刚听阿布蒂那边的士兵说
that you gave an identical speech to troops at pillowtown.
你在枕头城也发表了相同的演说
Wtf? Sad face.
搞什么哭丧脸
Special icon of a downward thumb.
特殊标志大拇指向下
Annie, okay, you caught me.
好吧被你发现了
I prefer war to homework.
比起写作业我宁可打仗
How do you do that little thumb icon?
你那个拇指标志怎么打出来的
I can't find it on my phone.
我在手♥机♥里找不到
Jeff Winger.
杰夫·翁格
Jeff, you're disgusting.
杰夫你真恶心
Troy and Abed's friendship is at stake.
特洛伊和阿布蒂的友谊可是岌岌可危
You can buy special icons and packages at the app store.
你可以在APP商店买♥♥到特殊标志和表情包
Piece of sushi, birthday cake, stop sign, snowman, umbrella.
寿司生日蛋糕停车标志雪人雨伞
Annie Edison.
安妮·埃迪生
Pierce Hawthorne, humiliated
皮尔斯·霍桑
in the Battle of Big Bulletin Board,
因为在大公告栏一役受辱
wants a chance to redeem himself.
希望找机会一雪前耻
I'm working on something. Look at this.
我研究了点东西你看
You can build this?
你能造出来吗
You just give me the pillows.
你得给我提供枕头
I hope to God we'll never have to use it.
希望我们永远也不会用上它
Oh, me too.
我也这么想
Rumors of Hawthorne's weapon find their way to Troy.
霍桑武器的流言传进了特洛伊耳中
Troy Barnes will take no chances.
特洛伊·巴恩斯不敢忽视这一消息