废柴联盟（2009）
Community
第一季
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废柴联盟（2009）
Community S01E01
Part 1
Oct. 19, 2020, 1:24 p.m.
Good morning.
早上好
How do we turn this off?
这个怎么关掉
Can you help me turn this off?
过来帮我关一下
How do we turn this off? Can you help me with this?
这个怎么关掉 你帮下我好吗
Oh, thank you, thank you so much. I didn't mean to snap.
谢谢 太谢谢了 我不是故意弄出噪音的
Good morning.
早上好
Many of you are halfway through
你们中的大多数
your first week here at Greendale. And as your Dean,
在格林德尔刚上课半周 作为院长
I thought I would
我觉得应该
share a few thoughts of wisdom and inspiration.
和大家分享一些智慧和灵感
What is community college?
什么是社区大学
Well, you've heard all kinds of things.
大家肯定听说了很多风言风语
You've heard it's loser college
说我们是废柴大学 专收
for remedial teens, 20-something dropouts,
差生补习班的少年 二十多岁的辍学生
middle-age divorcees,
中年离异者
and old people keeping their minds active
以及那些不活个万万岁不罢休
as they circle the drain of eternity.
怕自己染上老年痴呆的人
That's what you heard.
听到的是这些 没错吧
However, I wish you luck!
不管怎样 祝大家好运
Okay, you know
好了 现在
Okay, there's more to this speech.
等等 演讲还没完
There's actually a middle card that is missing.
我掉了一张提示卡
Can we all look around our immediate areas,
大家看看周围有没有
cause I really wanted to...
因为我很想...
I'm only half-Arabic, actually.
其实我是阿♥拉♥伯混血
My dad is Palestinian. He's a U.S. citizen.
我爸是巴勒斯坦人 他是美国公民
He's not a threat to national security or anything.
他不是个威胁国♥家♥安♥全♥的危险份子
A lot of people want to know that after they meet him,
很多人见过他后都想知道他是否危险
because he has an angry energy. But not, like, angry at America.
因为他脾气暴躁 但不是针对美国
Just angry at my mom for leaving him.
只是痛恨我妈离开了他
Although she did leave because he was angry.
但我妈也是因为他太凶才离开的
And he was angry because she's American.
他凶我妈是因为她是美国人
My name's Abed, by the way.
我叫阿布蒂 顺便说一下
Abed, nice to know you and then meet you in that order.
阿布蒂 很高兴先了解你再认识你
Now about that question that I had?
我刚才问你的是...
Five after eleven when you asked.
你问的时候是11点过5分
Abed? Yeah?
阿布蒂 什么事
What's the deal with the hot girl from Spanish class?
认不认识那个西班牙语课的辣妹
I can't find a road in there.
我打探不到
Well, I only talked to her once
我只和她说过一次话
while she was borrowing a pencil, but...
因为她跟我借铅笔
Her name is Britta, she's 28, birthday in October.
她叫布雷塔 28岁 生日在♥十♥月♥
She has two older brothers and one of 'em
有两个哥哥 其中一位
works with children who have a disorder, I might want to look up.
治疗儿童机能紊乱 这病我可能要去查查
Oh, and she thinks she's gonna flunk tomorrow's test,
而且她觉得 她明天考试肯定会挂
so she really needs to focus
她要集中精力应付考试
so she's sorry if that makes her seem cold.
如果因此显得冷淡 她很抱歉
Holy crap.
老天
Abed...
阿布蒂
I see your value now.
我看到了你的价值所在
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
这是别人对我说过的最贴心的话
Absolutely not.
不许进来
If these guys knew you like I did,
如果校方像我一样了解你
they would've give you a small office.
他们就会给你一间小办公室
Jeff Winger!
杰夫·翁格
Genius at law.
法律天才
You got to stop saying that.
快别夸我了
I will never do that. Sit down.
那可不行 请坐
I still cannot figure out
我还是不明白
how you got a jury to connect September the 11th with my DUI,
你怎么让陪审团把911和我醉酒驾驶联♥系♥起来
let alone why that helped.
更不懂 为什么这样我就无罪了
Well, 2002 was a simpler time.
2002年的日子比较好混
So what is my lawyer doing here?
律师大人 有何贵干
I'm a student.
我是这里的学生
Well, that cannot be an inspiring journey.
这里可不是静思自我的好地方
I am in a bit of a jam.
我遇到了点麻烦
The state bar has suspended my license.
律师协会吊销了我的执照
They found out my college degree
他们发现我的大学文凭
was less than legitimate.
不够合法
I thought you had a bachelor's from Columbia.
我以为你有哥伦比亚[大学]的学士学位
Now I have to get one from America.
现在我必须在美国拿一个学位
And it can't be an email attachment.
电邮附件那种是不行的
Well, you've picked a fine school.
那你就选对学校了
Yes, and I'm hoping that our friendship
是的 我希望我们的友谊
will yield certain advantages.
能为我带来优势
You know, academic guidance. Yes.
学术指导 没错
Moral support,
精神支持
every answer to every test
我选的所有课的
for every one of the classes that I'm taking.
所有考试的全部答案
Here's my schedule. No.
这是我的课表 不行
Now, Jeff, just by asking that,
杰夫 你提这个
you have insulted the integrity of this entire institution.
就已经侮辱了我们学校的正直与诚信
Waster! Not a bathroom!
废柴 这里不是厕所
Not a bathroom. Okay.
不是厕所 好的
Duncan, you did seem less into integrity
邓肯 在我说服12名陪审员的那天
the day that I convinced 12 of yours peers
你可没这么正直诚信
that when you made that u-turn on the freeway
我说你在高速公路上突然调头
and tried to order chalupas from the emergency call box
试图用紧急电♥话♥订墨西哥肉饼
that your only real crime was loving America.
唯一罪行就是热爱美国 你可没反对
I do love America. I love it very much.
我的确爱美国 很爱很爱
I love chalupas.
我也爱墨西哥肉饼
But...
但是
I'll look into it. Thank you.
我会试试 谢了
Duncan, you are a good man.
邓肯 你是个好人
Jeff, are you familiar with the adage,
杰夫 你知不知道俗话说
"Cheaters never prosper"?
骗子不能飞黄腾达
No, and if I wanted to learn something,
不知道 如果我真想学点什么
I wouldn't have come to community college.
我是不会来社区大学的
Hey! Spanish.
学西班牙语呢
Don't hit on me, okay?
别想着泡我 行不
I wouldn't dream of it.
我做梦都不敢
I just wanted to let you know about my Spanish study group.
我只是想跟你说 我有个西语学习小组
The guy who's playing bejeweled on his iPhone all class
整堂课用手♥机♥玩宝石迷阵游戏的人
has a study group?
竟然有学习小组
Um, can I sign up twice?
我能报两次名吗
I'm taking the class as an easy credit.
我是冲着这学分好拿才选这课的
I'm actually a Spanish tutor.
其实我是西语家教
Board certified.
有资格证书的
Can you say that in Spanish now?
能用西语把你刚说的再说一遍吗
I really need help with Spanish.
我的西语 非常需要帮助
Yeah, I was willing to bet.
我想也是
I'm Jeff...or Jefe.
我叫杰夫或者老板[继续乱说]
The group meets at the library at 4:00.
学习小组4点在图书馆集♥合♥
Britta. Thanks.
我叫布雷塔 谢了
You're gonna be there?
你会来吗
Poquito mas
再多一点
That means see you there.
这是"到时见"的意思
Shouldn't be too hard to fake a study group, right?
要伪造一个学习小组应该不难吧
Oh, Jeez, I'm sorry.
老天 对不起
I was raised on TV.
我是从小看电视长大的
I was conditioned to believe that
习惯性地认为
every black women over 50s are cosmic mentor.
五十多岁的黑人女性全是"啥都管"顾问
Were you conditioned to pay for your damn taco, Sein-field?
那你有习惯付玉米卷的钱吗 宋灰
Yes, I'm so sorry. It's Seinfeld.
当然 非常抱歉 宋飞才对[《宋飞传》NBC经典喜剧]
Bien-- Bien-- Bienvenido.
欢 欢迎
Bienvenido.
欢迎[西语]
Hey, all right, come on in.
太好了 过来吧
Got the whole table.
整张桌子都是我们的
Yeah, here's the, uh... The whole room.
这是...整间房♥都是啊
contact sheet.
花名册
废柴联盟（2009）
Community
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