废柴联盟（2009）

Community S03E03

Part 4 Oct. 20, 2020, 9:40 a.m.

And it destroys everything it touches!
你们的爱能摧毁一切所及之物
I no longer care about grades.
我不在乎成绩了
Or biology.
也不在乎生物课
Or finally graduating from college,
不在乎能否毕业也不打算再遵守
Like I promised my dying father.
父亲弥留时自己许下的承诺
I'm going home.
我要回家了
I'm gonna hold my wife and my child close.
和老婆孩子相亲相爱
And I am gonna finally take my insulin shot!
而且我要开始打胰岛素了
Offense taken.
我介意
Offense taken.
我很介意
Well, he is right about one thing.
好吧他至少说对了一件事儿
You're all terrible people.
你们都糟透了
And I don't care about this stupid assignment.
我也不在乎这破作业了
I'm going home.
我也要回家了
No, I'm not, I'm going to biology class.
我就算了该去上生物课了
It starts in 15 minutes.
还有十五分钟就开始
And enventually, this caterpillar
最终这个毛毛虫
will come out of its cocoon. And then--
会从它的茧里面钻出来之后
Pop, pop!
嘣嘣
Nice work, you two.
合作不错
You know they're laughing at you, right?
你知道他们是在笑你对吧
I mean, that's my theory.
这是我的一家之言
Now, super group.
现在该你们了无敌组合
I can't help but notice a sorry lack of terrariums.
我不禁注意到你们都没带生态箱
We didn't have time to finish.
我们没来得及完成作业
Here's mine.
我完成了
When did you even have time to do that?
你什哪来时间做完的呀
You're pathological.
你非人类吗
It's too late for flattery.
现在恭维为时已晚
Professor, obviously this isn't working out.
教授很明显这行不通
You're just gonna have to put us with our original lab partners.
我们真心求实验原配
All right? I don't have to do anything.
可以吗我不打算插手
Not after you broke my boy Todd.
更别说你们伤害了我的托德
That man called me crying this morning.
今早上那男人给我打电♥话♥ 哭诉啊
You know he fought in Iraq, right?
伊♥拉♥克♥参战都未有泪轻弹
We had a name for people like you in prison.
在监狱里说你们这种人有句行话
We called you "The mean clique."
叫做"排外小帮派"
But I have a solution.
但我有个解决方法
All seven of you will share a microscope,
你们七个人就共用一个显微镜
one bench, and one grade that I will average.
一张板凳全组算平均分
Everyone else gets their own stuff.
其他同学照常计分
So can we get an extension on the first assignment?
第一个任务有附加分吗
No. You all fail.
不一组全挂
Oh, my god.
哦天啊
How did this happen?
这是怎么回事
And did I miss the firemen?
消防队员已经走了吗
Dean, the explanation is simple.
院长答案很简单
It's all connected.
多有联♥系♥ 线索汇集
A web of conspiracy that goes
一张阴谋之网已经张开
all the way to the top of Arizona.
所有证据都指向亚利桑那的上北
All...Right.
好吧
Hey, somebody's been squatting in the utility closet.
看来储物间一直有人在住
There's a hot plate back there, thousands of matches,
放了个个平底锅还有好多火柴
I mean, we're looking at dozens
这下可一并破坏了
of major health and fire code violations.
劳工安全准则和防火条例
I think we're gonna have to get the police involved.
我觉得应该要求警方介入
And that's when it hit me.
这个当口我顿时醒悟
I was in really big trouble.
原来我有大♥麻♥烦了
Dean.
院长
Dean?
院长
Oh, uh...No.
哦不
No need to get the cops.
没必要找警♥察♥来
With a conspiracy this big,
阴谋如此之大
they're probably involved.
警♥察♥也逃不了干系
What? What Chang says
什么昌说的
Makes a lot of sense, and, um...
还是很有道理的
Okay, you know what? I quit.
好吧我辞职
I mean, I can deal with the not getting paid,
你可以不给我发薪水
but I draw the line at you enabling this man.
但和他共事却是万万不能
I mean, I'm seriously concerned that he's mentally ill.
我真觉得他有精神病
And--and it's not funny at all. It's scary.
一点儿都不好笑太惊悚了
The top of Arizona... I needed to know more
亚利桑那的"上"北我需要知道更多的事情
Was it a very high mesa? About those firemen.
难道那里地势很高至于那些消防队员
Or was it a state of mind? Were they ethnically diverse?
或是意料之外想象之州民族多样吗
Either way, I was going...
不管怎样我还是要
Did they bring a dalmatian?
他们有没有救生犬
To have to climb it. Could I buy a calendar?
一步一步往上爬能买♥♥到纪念挂历吗
Okay, screw this. I-I quit.
好吧不费话了我辞职
Well, it seems that Greendale owes you a debt of gratitude.
看来格林德尔欠你一句"多谢保密"
How would you like to be the new head of security?
你来接任保安科长怎样
I had to think fast.
我必须当机立断
Yes.
好
I don't know, was I crazy?
我也不知道我是疯了吗
Or was I just doing right by the school?
还是我只是为校着想
This is awkward, isn't it?
真丢脸不是吗
You know, I think it's pretty clear
事实摆在我们眼前
What destroyed the balance in our study group's ecosystem.
破坏小组生态平衡的罪魁祸首显而易见
Ranking one person above another.
互相攀比吗
Letting our differences get the bets of us.
对彼此不同缺乏忍♥让
Racism? No.
种族歧视吗都不是
Todd.
是托德
Todd!
托德
Did you see the head on that guy?
发现那家伙很有搞"头"吗
"None taken."
"不介意"个屁啊
What was wrong with him?
他究竟哪根筋不对
Not to be unchristian, but that boy sucked.
基♥督♥徒不好爆粗口但那笔"真芯2B"
I missed this.
同仇敌忾的感觉回来了
And his dumb baby!
还有他的傻宝宝
I know! On and on.
我明白继续继续啊
He wouldn't shut up.
他就不能闭嘴吗
These questions are really personal.
这些问题好有针对性
Are you sure this is anonymous?
你确定这是匿名的吗
Yeah, they're just practice evaluations for my psych class.
就是心理学布置的评估作业
All right. Who did a butt?
好吧谁画了个屁♥股♥
They're boobs. And I don't know.
那是胸大吧也不知道是谁画的
Take it again.
再做一份
All right.
好吧
Somebody drew a penis.
有人还画了个老二
Oh! And another penis.
哦又是一个老二
Penis, penis, penis. Very mature, guys.
老二老二你们二到啥程度了
I didn't draw a penis. Me neither.
我没画老二啊我也没画啊
Yeah, these are all normally filled out tests.
这些问卷填写的很规范啊
Ha ha! Gotcha!
耍到你们了
This was also a test, and you all penised.
这确实是一个测试你们都老二了
Passed.
通过了
Maybe I need to take one.
或者我也应该做一下
A test. Not a penis.
是做测试不是做老二