废柴联盟（2009）

Community S03E01

Part 3 Oct. 20, 2020, 9:39 a.m.

from nostril to rectum, now until the end of time.
鼻孔吸入穿肠而出让你永世不得翻身
And that's "Whazup."
我能咋地就这么地
I forgot everything you said before "Rectum"!
我除了"穿肠" 啥也没听见
Who are these guys?
这些是什么人
This is my legal team because I think it's time
这是我的律师团队因为我觉得
we worked out a new agreement.
是时候签订一份新协议了
He doesn't look like a lawyer.
这货不像律师呀
That's a barber.
这位是理发师
Because I'm also sick of that ridiculous goatee.
我看你那山羊胡子傻了吧唧的很不爽
You look like a white Lou Gossett, jr.
你的样子就像白人版小路易·格赛特
You deserve a bigger office.
蜗居这个小办公室真屈才
Biggest office I ever had.
从来没用过这么大的
I'm here to apologize, Dr. King,
我专程来道歉金博士
and beg you for a seat in biology.
请求你准许我回到生物课堂
I tell you what, in sync, you wanna learn about life?
我告诉你你想知晓生活的意义
Give up the phone.
手♥机♥上交
Oh. You're asking me for a bribe?
哦想要贿赂是吧
I can't be bought, man. You feel me?
你觉得我是贪图贿赂的那种人吗
See, prison was my walls.
我被囚于监狱
But you put your walls up.
你却人际疏离
You, and your phone, and your attitude,
你和那手♥机♥ 那态度
and your fruit loops Cologne.
还有你的果香氛古龙香水
Your walls put up so tight, man,
筑成隔阂的铁墙
Not even a blade of grass could get through.
没有一片草叶能够进入
But even if it did, you wouldn't appreciate it.
即使有你也不会觉悟
that's why you can't come back to my class.
正因如此你不能回到我的班上
What's your problem with me, man?
你到底看我哪里不顺眼啊大佬
And don't act like it's not about me specifically
别说得好像没在针对我
because you've been in--
别总拿监狱说
busted!
混♥蛋♥
Hey! Take it easy, Winger.
淡定淡定翁格
Everything okay?
没事吧
It is now that I have this.
我现在拿到这个了
This is my ticket to getting back in the group.
这就是我重回学习小组的通行证
Hey! Hey!
喂你站住
I want to be in the group so bad!
我想进小组都想疯了
All right, let's smoke 'em and choke 'em.
灌烟熏猴子
No! No! N-n-n--
不不惨了
Uhoh. What is that?
啊呀那是什么
Monkey gas!
驱猴烟雾
Monkey gas?
驱猴烟雾
Oh, my g--
哦我勒个
Abed?
阿布蒂
All your friends are here.
朋友们都陪着你呢
They wanna talk to you.
他们想和你交谈
I don't get it.
我就不明白了
How is this different from the way he always is?
他平时不也这个状态吗
I don't want to push it,
我不想操之过急
but this would be a great time to baptize him.
但现在是拉他入教的绝好机会
Abed, maybe this can be your new favorite show.
阿布蒂可能这部剧会成为你新的最爱
It's a British sci-fi series
这是部英国科幻剧
that's been on the air since 1962.
首播于1962年
Britta, you've done enough, okay?
布雷塔再说只会搞砸的
Why don't you go start a ruiners' club?
你干脆创一个砸锅俱乐部算了
Oh wait, you'd probably just ruin it.
哦不行交给你创办会砸锅的
Well then, I'd be doing a good job
但是我虽砸尤荣
because it's a ruiners' club.
因为这本来就是砸锅俱乐部
You ruined my analogy.
我的比喻被你一说也砸了
Guys, look!
伙计们快看
Blimey, inspector!
啊呀时空探长
Where have we wound up this time?
我们这回又穿越到哪里了
The question isn't where, constable, but when.
不是穿越到哪里警官是穿越到何时
Inspector, look out! Blorgons!
探长小心机器河蟹
Eradicate! Eradicate!
消灭他们消灭他们
This is the best show I've ever seen in my entire life.
这是我这辈子看过的最有才的电视剧
Having fun without me again?
齐欢乐又不带我
Jeff, what happened? You look 70.
杰夫出什么事了你咋变七十了
Abed has a new favorite tv show, Jeff.
阿布蒂有了电视剧新宠杰夫
It's called "Inspector Spacetime"
叫《时空探长》
Can it, boobs. I came here to let you know
闭嘴胸大我来是要告诉大家
that your best friend Pierce is the one that got me
你们的好朋友皮尔斯就是害我被踢出
kicked out of bio class and the study group.
生物课和学习小组的罪魁祸首
It was a plan he hatched from the beginning
打一开始他就早有预谋
with his pal, professor Kane.
帮凶就是他的好兄弟凯恩教授
But, Jeff, that's a photo I gave our professor
杰夫这张探监照是我给教授的
of me visiting Hawthorne wipes' spokesman
我看望的是霍桑纸巾代言人
and rap artist sugar Cube in prison during the '90s.
说唱大♥师♥"方糖" 那是90年代的事了
Well, th-th-they look alike.
但是他们两个好像
Uh, I guess they share one important feature in your eyes.
两人在你眼里只有一个特征吧
Well, that's not fair!
这不公平
Look, I-I-I-I was standing far away,
听着我当时站得很远
and I saw the prison uniform!
我一眼望去只看到囚衣
Oh, Jeffrey!
杰夫瑞
Oh, come on, obviously I don't mean
得了吧我又不是说
all black people are in prison!
所有的黑人兄弟都蹲过号♥子
Jeff, clearly you have gone off the deep end.
杰夫你做得太过了
Don't blame him.
别怪他
The table is powerful, and being cut off from it--
这张桌子有魔力无它时心不宁...
Shut the--
你给我闭...
I've become...agitated.
我激动了
I apologize.
我道歉
We'll continue this discourse at a later date.
我们择期再继续聊
Good night.
晚安
He just needs some space.
他需要一个人静一静
I'm going to kill the one thing you love!
老子要宰了你们心爱的东西
I'm gonna kill it!
老子要宰了他
As long as it breathes, it controls our lives!
只要他还喘气儿就会控制我们的生活
I just came by to tell everyone
我只是过来告诉大家
this year isn't gonna be that different.
今年与往年相比不会有啥不同
With the notable exception, we really won't have any money.
唯独明显的例外就是我们真得一贫如洗
Have a nice night.
睡得开心点
What is with that guy?
这家伙什么毛病啊
Did you find the monkey?
猴子捉到了吗
No, but here's the invoice for the gassing.
没有这是烟雾剂的账单
Okay, as it turns out, I cannot pay this...
事实证明我没钱付这个
or your salaries starting on... two weeks ago.
你们的薪水也会在两周前停掉
But, what I do have are these vouchers
可是我手头有这些代金券
for the classes of your choosing.
学院课程任你选
You're lucky I need my scuba certification.
劳资需要潜水执照你算赚到了
Okay, okay.
好了我招了
I'm the one living in your vents.
是我住在通风管里
I have no home and no job.
我是无家可归的无业游民
Does that mean you'll work for room and board?
这么说管住管吃不开你工资都行
Okay, I was lying the whole time.
好吧我一直在说谎
I didn't want the group to evolve.
我根本不要什么升华
I just didn't want Pierce around. I hate him.
我只想让皮尔斯消失我讨厌他
Okay, but Jeff, what you did-- it's hard to get past that.
可是杰夫你的行为让人无法原谅
I know you're already out of the study group,
我知道你已经退出学习小组了
but I'm gonna have to ask that you stop being my friend.
但是恐怕我也不能再把你当朋友了
Okay, look, everybody, here's the thing,
好啦听着各位事实是这样的
I am not as evolved as I said I was.
我并没有像自己说的那样升华了
The biology class was full, so I told professor Kane
生物课满员了于是我跟凯恩教授商量
I'd pay him a few thousand dollars to...
我给他几千大洋让他
k-kick Jeff out.
赶走杰夫
What?! Pierce!
什么皮尔斯
I can't believe Jeff attacked a table with a fire axe
杰夫都用消防斧狠劈桌子了
and still only managed to be the second craziest man in the room.
难以置信竟然有人比他还疯狂
Okay, everybody in favor of voting Pierce out of the group?
好了大家是否都赞成把皮尔斯踢出小组
Stop! Stop!
停下停下
Pierce isn't crazy.
皮尔斯没疯