废柴联盟（2009）

Community S03E07

Part 2 Oct. 20, 2020, 9:41 a.m.

I'll help you.
我来帮忙
But not in an uptight way.
我叫不紧张
I'm very concerned about this living situation.
我对这种同居形式很是担心
I mean, I've seen enough episodes of Friends to know that
我看过那么多集《老友记》发现
cohabitation leads to sex, drugs
同居生活会引发性关系嗑药
and something Parade magazine called Schwimmer-fatigue.
还有《时尚大观》杂♥志♥上讲的修蒙疲乏症
Good for you, Shirley. What's the saying?
真有你的雪瑞老话怎么说来着
If you can't stop 'em, judge 'em?
若是管不了那就可劲唾弃
Well, somebody's gotta be this group's moral compass.
总得有人充当小组的道德底线
And that somebody has to be you, right?
天降大任于雪瑞是吧
Because by moral compass, you mean Shirley's religion.
所谓道德底线根本就是你的宗教标准
Want a ride?
要不要搭车
Well, if this is a forecast of the conversation,
如果这段对话是情景模拟的话
I will ride with somebody else.
我的回答是宁可搭别人的车
Don't worry, Shirley.
别担心雪瑞
Keep me company while I fix this
留下来陪我等我一搞定
and I'll give you a ride over there.
就开车带你过去
Britta!
布雷塔等我
Well, hey there, stranger!
哟那边的陌生帅哥
What a coincidence, huh?
真是有缘千里来相会呀
This is just like that, uh, Lake House movie.
这简直像是《触不到的恋人》情景再现
I can only assume. Even I have limits.
只能自行假想我也是有下限的
Dean Pelton.
派尔顿院长
Jeff, it's Saturday. Call me Craig.
杰夫今天周六叫人家克拉格啦
Off campus, I'm just a Craigular Joe.
出了学校人家只是个克氏普版小乔
Ooh, what'd you get?
哟你买♥♥的什么呀
Ah, now I feel like I have to head back out there.
我有点想去退货了
Dean--uh, Craig,
院长克拉格
It's nice to see you but I actually have to run.
见到你很高兴但我要先走一步了
Oh, yeah, you're probably heading to help Annie move.
要赶去帮安妮搬家
Right?
对吧
Oh, I follow Troy and Abed on Twitter.
我一直在跟踪特哥布弟微博动向
Looks like Annie's moving and you're...
貌似安妮在搬家而你却
sick at the hospital?
生病住院了
Curious.
有意思
I might head there myself.
我也该过去凑个热闹
I could tell them you said hi.
替你向他们问声好
I'd rather you didn't.
最好不要
Well, maybe I won't have time.
可能我抽不出空
Especially if we're doing...
前提是我们忙着
Lunch?
吃午饭
Yeah, but your religion isn't the same as morality.
对但宗教信仰和道德是两回事
And calling me amoral because I'm atheistic
因为我是无神论者就说我道德沦丧
is religious persecution.
这叫宗教迫♥害♥
How can I religiously persecute you?
我怎么能宗教迫♥害♥你
You don't have a religion.
你根本就没有宗教信仰啊
Oh, look! A hitchhiker.
快看有搭车的
A person in need.
一个需要帮助的人
Oh, my God. What am I doing?
哦上帝我在干什么呢
I'm pulling over to help him out.
我在停车准备帮他一把
Do not help him out.
不要去帮他
Why, because it proves the existence
为什么呢因为这代表世俗社会
of secular morality?
也是有道德的吗
No, because he looks stinky.
不因为他看起来又脏又臭
Judge not, Shirley. Judge not.
勿以外表论人雪瑞勿以外表论人
I really appreciate it, thank you.
真的很感激谢谢你
Where are you headed, fellow human?
你要去哪里啊世人朋友
Riverside falls?
河滨瀑布
That's 40 minutes away.
那要四十分钟的路程呢
Oh, I guess I'm just a really good person.
那我可真的是个活雷锋
I knew you were.
我就知道你是好人
I could see the kindness in your faces.
慈眉善目亲和相
I assume you've both accepted Jesus Christ
我想二位一定也奉耶稣基♥督♥
as your lord and savior?
为救世主吧
Oh, that's nice.
真不错
Needed a coat of paint anyway.
早晚要再刷一层漆
Welcome, Annie, to your new home.
安妮欢迎来到你的新家
Okay...To reacquaint you, there's the bathroom,
好重新引见一下那里是洗手间
kitchen, and, of course, our bedroom.
厨房♥ 还有我们的卧室
And if the room's a rockin' please come a knockin'
如果听到声响拜托先敲门
because there's something probably terribly wrong.
因为里面没准在上演三俗戏码
Yeah, we're pretty chill in there.
对我们私下比较随便
Mm-hmm, now let's go see your room.
嗯下面来看你的卧室
What's that?
这是什么玩意
That is your room.
你的房♥间
You said this was a two bedroom.
你们之前说有两个卧室
It is, one, two.
是啊一间两间
Yours is a blanket fort.
你的是毯子城♥堡♥间
An awesome blanket fort.
超棒的毯子城♥堡♥
But still highly flammable so no candles.
不过高度易燃严禁火烛
What do you think?
你觉得如何
Tweet it? Tweeting it!
发微博呗果断发
I'm not suprised you're so taken aback.
吃惊很正常
This apartment is where dreams come true.
在这间公♥寓♥ 童年梦想成真
We spent our whole lives being told that blanket forts
从小到大大家都说非到特殊场合
are only for special occasions,
不用毯子城♥堡♥
like sleepovers or when uncles die.
除非为借宿之夜或是叔叔过世
But that's a lie, Annie.
大错特错安妮
You can live in a fort of blankets
你就可以尽情享受毯子城♥堡♥
all day, every night.
从早住到晚
It's so awesome.
真的好棒
I'm surprised you guys haven't chosen to live in one.
既然如此为什么你们不住这里
Well, we'll be spending enough time in yours.
我们在你房♥间也不会少待
I mean, it's where we're gonna watch tv.
要在这里看电视呢
Right.
好吧
Uh, what's that door over there?
那扇门后是什么
That's not a bedroom?
不是卧室吗
No. Oh, no, no, no.
不是完全不是
Is it a linen closet?
难不成是壁橱吗
Something like that.
差不多吧
What's a linen closet?
什么是壁橱
A siesta salad and an iced tea.
一份西埃斯特沙拉和冰茶
Excelente. And for you?
好的您呢
The gentleman... Oh...
给这位先生哎哟
will have a top natch-os
来一份至尊玉米脆
and a watermelon margarita.
和一杯西瓜玛格丽塔
Thank you, Jeffrey.
谢谢你杰夫瑞
So, any brothers or sisters?
家里有没有兄弟姐妹呀
And we'll take the check too.
顺便结个帐
Oh! What's the rush?
那么急干嘛
We're eating lunch, and then I'm leaving.
好好吃午饭吃完我就走
Okay. I just hope that I don't
好吧那就希望下周一
bump into your study group on Monday.
我不会偶遇学习小组的人吧
And I pray they don't ask me
也希望他们不会问我
who I saw at the mall on Saturday.
周六在商场看到谁了
Because, unlike a certain someone,
因为不像某些人
I just don't think I could lie to those sweet people.
我不忍♥心欺骗纯良孩子
Dean, this is blackmail.
院长你这是在敲诈我
Ah! Call me Craig.
叫我克拉格就行
And call blackmail "A day at the mall with Craig."
说敲诈多难听这叫"克拉格商场一日游"
Because that's all I require, Jeffrey.
我就这么点小愿望杰夫瑞
You and I are going to have some fun.
一起找乐子去吧
And create a few memories.
留下点美好回忆
And I suggest you get into it.
希望你全心全意投入其中
Because that counts.
态度很重要哦
A song for the senior, senior?
给先生点首歌♥吗先生
Adios amores.
再见了我的爱
Oh, what a surprise.
真让人家意外
Jeez.
天呐
This is actually quite calming for some reason.
不知为啥感觉心平气和