废柴联盟（2009）

Community S03E12

Part 2 Oct. 20, 2020, 9:41 a.m.

of resembling French Stewart runs dry.
找准时机混上管理层了
French Stewart...
弗伦奇·斯图尔特
And speaking of gold mines,
说到"值钱"
You owe me three grand, pal.
哥们你欠我三千块
Cool. Put it on my account.
行记我账上
What do I look like, a sucker?
你当我谁啊傻♥逼♥吗
French Stewart. But I don't have three grand.
我当你是弗伦奇·斯图尔特可我没钱
Well, you know what, you better get it.
那你最好找钱来
Because I'm gonna tell you something right now--
我可告诉你
Holy crap, you'd make an amazing Seacrest.
我去你扮西克雷斯特肯定不错
Very kind. Thank you.
谢谢夸奖
You're actually a lot taller than Seacrest.
而且你比他还高大不少
You've actually got a sharper jaw too.
下巴也更尖一些
It's amazing, you're actually more handsome than the guy
比起那个以帅独步江湖的小子
who's famous for being handsome.
你可比他帅多了
Jeff?
杰夫
You'll be okay. Just stay humble.
没事的姿态放低些
You know what, maybe there's another option for you.
这样吧哥再给你指条明路
I've got a big event Saturday,
周六我有一场活动
Needs a lot of bodies, huh?
特缺人
And I see some high-value faces here.
你们这又有几张不错的明星脸
Got an Oprah.
奥普拉
And sitting next to her
她身边这位呢
is a Judy Garland or an Anne Hathaway.
可以扮朱迪·嘉兰或者安妮·海瑟薇
Add a few extra teeth.
不过得装副大门牙
Wow, this is rare.
这俩更绝
Both versions of Michael Jackson.
黑白两版迈克尔·杰克逊
And you...
你呢
Fat Brando. Burt Reynolds.
发福白兰度伯特·雷诺兹
What? What?
啥啥
Fat Brando. Burt Reynolds.
发福白兰度伯特·雷诺兹
Whatever. Whatever.
随便随便
Look, if you guys work this gig for me
你们要是来干这一票
for six hours, we'll call it even.
六小时咱就算扯平了
Sounds fun.
可以啊
Abed, Vinnie, can we have a minute to talk about this?
阿布蒂文尼能让我们商量一下吗
Sure. Come on, Vinnie. The guy who makes the fish sticks
行文尼来那个炸鱼条的
looks just like Quincy Jones.
长得超像昆西·琼斯
Get out. Seriously.
不会吧真的
Guys, I'm sorry,
不好意思
but this is where we have to put our foot down.
这事儿我们不能掺和
Well, she has a point.
她说的挺在理
Next time it'll be $10,000, and then $20,000,
下次说不定就是一万再下次就是两万
and then he'll hit rock bottom
然后越欠越多
and have no one to turn to but Jesus.
最后只有上帝能帮他了
I say we let this play out.
要我说咱们别管了
I'd love to help,
我倒是愿意帮忙
But playing Ryan Seacrest at a big party
不过在大型派对上扮瑞安·西克雷斯特
may not be a safe situation for me.
对我本人可能不太好
We could actually hurt Abed
每次阿布蒂要面对现实问题
if every time he faces reality,
我们就穿上戏服帮他搞定
we dress up and play make-believe to bail him out.
这样是在害阿布蒂
Shame on you people.
你们真好意思说
It's not our job to help Abed grow up.
阿布蒂要不要成长不用你们管
Abed doesn't need reality.
他不需要现实
Abed is a magical, elf-like man
他是一个谜一样的神人
who makes us all more magical by being near us.
有他在我们的生活也充满了神奇色彩
Pierce, who came over in the middle of the night
皮尔斯上次你大半夜忘了怎么放屁
that time you forgot how to fart?
是谁过去教你的
Abed. Shirley...
阿布蒂雪瑞
Who got you a dvd of Precious,
是谁帮你搞到了由萨菲尔的小说《推》
based on the novel Push, by Sapphire,
改编的电影《珍爱》的DVD
and a copy of the novel Push autographed by Sapphire?
连同萨菲尔亲笔签名版的《推》
Abed.
阿布蒂
All we had was dumb reality before we met that man.
遇见他之前我们都活在没劲的现实中
And he's made all of our lives better than reality.
有了他生活就美好得多
Now it becomes a little inconvenient,
现在就出了这么一小点状况
and it's time to get real?
你们就又要转回现实了吗
For shame!
丢人
He's right. Sorry, Troy.
他说得对对不起特洛伊
Hey, guys.
伙计们
Abed, we would be happy to help you out.
阿布蒂我们很愿意帮忙
It'll be a good time.
会很有意思的
Cool. Cool, cool, cool, Cool.
好好好好好
Oprah. Oh, thank you.
奥普拉谢谢
See ya, Vin. Fat Brando.
回见文发福白兰度
Burt Reynolds. Yeah.
伯特·雷诺兹好吧
Thanks for being flexible. This'll be fun.
多谢通融肯定会很好玩的
Fun. Yeah, sure. But here's the deal.
好玩好吧不过我丑话说前头
Um, if you guys mess this up,
你们要是搞砸了
Then his debt is overdue.
他那笔帐就算逾期未付
And I don't send another bill.
我呢也懒得再算账了
No, I send two guys that look a lot
我就派两个人来
Like Ving Rhames and Michael Chiklis.
俩人长得跟文·瑞姆斯和迈克尔·切克利斯一样
And they do a very convincing impression
要说打断腿这种戏码
of breaking your friend's legs.
他俩演得可好了
Their secret is... They actually break them.
秘诀是啥人家实打实地真打
All right, impersonators,
好了明星脸们
our guest of honor is one Howie Schwartz,
最尊贵的客人就一位豪伊·施沃茨
Who, according to the Talmud,
根据犹太礼教
just became a man. But I have to say,
他今天成年不过要我说呢
I wouldn't want him next to me in a foxhole.
小哥们还是奶娃一个
Ground rules--
基本守则
do stay in your assigned quadrants
根据划分好的区域大家画地为牢
Quoting lines from movies you are positive
别忘时不时来上一句
that your impersonatee was in.
你们模仿的人说过的电影台词
Do not leave your quadrant,
不要离开你们的负责区域
burp, fart, cough, hiccup, or cuss.
打嗝放屁咳嗽骂人通通禁止
The obvious exception being James,
当然吉姆斯除外
our resident Walter Matthau.
他扮演沃尔特·马修
How you doing, Jimmy?
吉米感觉怎么样
Aw, you give 'em hell.
你爱咋咋样
All right, let's go.
伙计们走吧
All my life I has to fight. I'm ready to tangle.
生命不息战斗不止放马过来吧
Handsome Seacrest, I need you in this tux.
美偶第一帅穿上这件礼服
Jeff, do not wear that.
杰夫不要穿
Aw, zip it, white Jacko.
闭嘴白皮杰克逊
Don't worry, that thing in the cafeteria freaked me out,
别担心那天在食堂我被吓得不轻
so I talked to my shrink,
所以我跟心理医生谈过后
and she doubled my dosage.
她把药量加倍了
What? Jeff, that's insane!
啥杰夫这太疯狂了
I thought so too, but after I took that extra pill,
我一开始也这么想但吃了加量药后
it seemed like a great idea.
顿时觉得一身轻松
Jeff, put it on. Go. No, Jeff!
杰夫穿好出发不杰夫
Britta, stop arguing.
布雷塔别吵了
If you have anything else to say,
你要想说什么
say it in a high-pitched voice while walking backwards.
就边滑太空步边尖着嗓子嚎
Jeff is in grave danger.
杰夫现在危在旦夕
Uh, may I help you?
请先留步
I'm one of the impersonators.
我是超级明星脸
Which one?
哪个明星
Do I have to say it?
非要我挑明了吗
Burt Reynolds.
伯特·雷诺兹啊
Uh, yeah, I don't believe anybody hired you
好吧我真心觉得没人肯雇你
to impersonate Burt Reynolds.
模仿伯特·雷诺兹
Why not? Do I have to say it?
为什么非要我挑明了吗
May I help you? I'm Brando.
你好我是白兰度
Could be under "Fat."
前缀 "发福"
Totally.
太像了啊
Go on in.
快请进