好汉两个半（2003）
Two and a Half Men S03E20
Part 3
Nov. 17, 2020, 12:19 p.m.
Kandi's told me so many nice things about you.
康迪夸了你很多事
How do you know Kandi?
你怎么认识康迪?
She's my daughter. Your daughter?
她是我女儿 你女儿?
Sweet whistling Geronimo.
哎哟我的妈呀
You people are like a box of hamsters,just crawling all over each other.
你们这些人就像一盒子仓鼠 裹在一起纠缠不清
Yes,yes.
对 对
We all get how this looks,Berta.
我们知道 波塔
Hey,I'm not knocking it.
嘿 我可不是挑刺
I'm just wondering when some of that gravy's gonna spill over on my taters.
我只想知道啥时候会纠缠上我
Hey,what's up?
嘿 怎么了?
What's up?What are you doing here?
怎么了?你在这儿干吗?
Well,Mandi came over to put in a good word for you...
曼迪 过来为你说好话
and I figured I'd tag along for grins.
我觉得我也应该过来陪笑脸
Here comes one now.
噢 现在就笑一个
Come on in.
进来
I'm in a nightmare and I can't wake up.
我简直就像在做一个不会醒的噩梦
Sit down.
坐吧
Make yourself at home.
当成自己家
Thanks...
谢谢
I will.
我会的
Where's Jake? He's at a sleepover.
杰克呢? 睡的正香呢
Hi,Alan.
嗨 艾伦
How are you?
你怎么样?
About two heartbeats from a brain aneurysm.
就像脑瘤引发的两次心脏病
Where's Kandi?
康迪呢?
She's in her room.
在房♥间里
But I thought we should talk first.
但是我觉得咱们应该先谈谈
We just have a few questions.
我们有几个问题
About what?
关于什么的?
Charlie?
查理?
Well,Kandi's mom and I are a little concerned about your intentions.
康迪的妈妈和我 对你的意图比较关心
You should be...
应该的
because I intend to kill you.
因为我打算杀了你
That's the kind of attitude that isn't gonna
这种态度可不会为你
win you a lot of friends around here,mister.
在这儿争取到朋友的 先生
Alan,you're a very sweet man.
艾伦 你是个很贴心的人
But let's face facts.
但是面对现实吧
Kandi has her whole life ahead of her,while you...
康迪的人生还很长 而你....
not so much.
却没多少
Kandi? Alan?
康迪? 艾伦?
I am so sorry. No,I'm sorry.
我很抱歉 不 我很抱歉
Oh,isn't that sweet?
噢 真好
I missed you so much. I missed you too,huggy bear.
我很想你 我也想你 抱抱熊
Mom,I'm gonna go have sex with Alan,okay?
妈 我要跟艾伦嘿♥咻♥ 可以么?
You kids have fun.
你们去玩吧
Hold on there,young man. What?
等一下 小伙子 什么?
Don't be a selfish lover.
別太自私了
Consider her needs.
考虑一下她的需要
This isn't over.
你给我等着
You're right.He is easy to screw with.
你说的对.他太容易上当了
Hey,four pieces of Almond Roca.Even the cat was laughing at him.
四块 杏仁糖.猫都会嘲笑他的
So should we head back to my place?
那么回我家去吧?
I suppose.
我觉得
What's wrong?
怎么了?
Nothing.It's just...
没什么 只是
we've already had sex there.
我们已经在那儿嘿♥咻♥过了
Oh,baby.I really,really like you.
噢 宝贝儿 我真爱你
Well,thank you,Judith.I had a wonderful evening.
谢谢 朱蒂斯 今天晚上很开心
I hope we can do it again some...
我希望我们再来点儿什么
Maybe catch a movie.
也许看场电影
Or go for a hike.
或者出去走走
I'm guessing that's your ex-husband.
我猜那就是你的前夫
Goodlooking man. Oh,he's gorgeous.
长的不错 噢 他很帅的
Dumb as wood.
呆得像木头
Oh,my Lord.
噢 上帝
But it's good wood.
不错的木头
I better find Alan so we can get out. You wanna leave?
最好找到艾伦 然后一块儿走 你要走?
This is so hot.
太急了吧
Oh,Mandi,you just keep getting better and better.
噢 曼迪 你变得越来越好了
Hang on while I give Alan a heads up. Hurry back and give me one.
等一下回来我去给艾伦通个气 快点儿回来 我也要
You're the most beautiful man I've ever seen.
你是我见过最帅的人
Not Alan.
不是 艾伦
Couldn't find him.
找不到他
You know what else I like?
你知道我还喜欢什么?
Swap meets.
"旧物[swap]交换会"
Swell. Yeah.
高涨[swell] 对
Your ex-husband must be a real little guy,huh?
你前夫肯定是个小个子吧?
Forget about him.Let's get some wine in you.
別说他了 给你拿点儿酒
Glasses are in there.
杯子在那儿
No,no.top shelf.
不 不 顶上
That's what I'm talking about.
这就是我的意思
Hey,you ever go rock climbing?It's a great workout.
嘿 你喜欢攀岩么?很棒的锻炼
Anybody? Over here.
有人么? 在这
Damn it.
见鬼
What are you doing? I was thirsty.
你干吗呢? 我渴了
Have you seen Alan?
看见艾伦了么?
I've been in the closet.
我一直在柜子里
So where the hell is he?
他到哪儿去了?
Oh,my,I'm sorry I'm so nervous.
哦 对不起 我太紧张了
I haven't been with another woman in a long time.
我很长时间都没跟別的女人在一起了
Yeah,yeah,take off your robe.
把你的衣服脱了
Okay.
好的
Hot damn.
太热辣了
Yeah,it is hot.
确实挺热的
Hi,Daddy.
嗨 爸爸
Hey,Judith.
嘿 朱蒂斯
Daddy,I want you to meet my boyfriend,Alan.
爸爸 给你介绍我男朋友艾伦
Nice to see you again. Small world.
很高兴再次见到你 世界真小
I said I was sorry. Just get out.
我说了抱歉 出去
I'll give you a call,Judith.Maybe we'll hit some garage sales.
我会给你打电♥话♥的 朱蒂斯.也许我们会碰上"现场旧货出♥售♥"
Yeah,terrific.
对 真可怕
I like your daughter.
我喜欢你女儿
I like your ex-wife.
我喜欢你前妻
Wanna get a drink?
喝一杯?
I'm not doing anything.
反正我也没事干
Do you like garage sales?
你喜欢现场旧货出♥售♥吗?
Where am I supposed to go?
我应该去哪儿?
I don't care.
我不管
Just leave.
走人
But I thought we were friends.
我以为我们是朋友呢
Friends don't have sex with their friends'
朋友就不该和朋友的前夫
ex-husbands in the first friend's hot tub.
在朋友的热浴池里幽会
Divorced three years and he's still ruining my life.
离婚都三年了 他还是阴魂不散的
Should have drowned his stupid ass.
真应该把这蠢蛋淹死
Did you hear something?
你听见什么了么?
Nope.
没有
How's the head? Let's find out.
口X如何? 试试看
好汉两个半（2003）
Two and a Half Men
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