好汉两个半（2003）
Two and a Half Men S03E12
Part 4
Nov. 17, 2020, 12:16 p.m.
Swim,splash,frolic, enjoy your healthy bodies.
游泳 泼水 打闹 享受你们那健康的身体吧
Okay. Bye.
好啊 回见
Have you no shame?
你还有羞耻心吗
Let me think.Nope.Just a tug.
我想想 没有 只有"牵掛"
Now that's another thing.My angst is real.
这是两码事 我的苦恼是真实的
I do not appreciate you taking my tug
我不希望你利用我的牵掛
and using it to get in someone's pants.
去扯別人的内♥裤♥
News flash,Alan,they're already out of their pants.
新闻快报 艾伦 她们已经没内♥裤♥了
And they're gonna come back cold,wet,
她们会又湿又冷的回来
and in desperate need of body heat.
急需身体取暖
Which means for those of us with normal
这意味着 对体温正常的
skin temperature,it'll be a seller's market.
我俩来说 可都是抢手货
You're unbelievable.
你真能乱想
No,I just think ahead.
不 我只是想法超前
They're only gonna last about two seconds in that water,
那种水温 她们最多还能坚持2秒钟
so we have to hurry.
我们要抓紧了
I'll get the wine,you light some candles,
我去弄酒 你点蜡烛
get a little ambiance going.
弄点气氛出来
I'm sorry,I'm really not in the mood.
抱歉 我真没那个心情
Are you saying that I have to
你是在逼我灌醉你
get you liquored up so I can get laid?
为了能一享艷福?
All right,I'll go along, but only as a favor to you.
好吧 照你说的做 但只是帮你忙
Thank you.
谢谢
I'm probably gonna have to apply the condom and
看来我非得帮他带上避孕套
get a rope and pulley to lower one of those broads onto him.
用滑轮和绳子 把女人降到他身上才行
Since you're making me do this,
既然是你求我帮忙
I get Amy.
我要艾米
The hell you do!
爱谁谁
Which one's Amy?
哪个是艾米
Amy's the one who overcame the eating disorder.
艾米是那个战胜了厌食症的
Starving herself or throwing up?
是不吃饭 还是催吐?
Does it make a difference?
有区別吗
It does if you're paying for dinner.
晚饭买♥♥单时会有区別
Amy is the brunette.
艾米是那个皮肤略黑的
Got it.So I have Jennifer.
知道了 那么詹妮弗归我
You mean Beth.
你是指贝丝
Right,right,"B" for blonde.
噢对 B代表"金发女郎"
"B" can also be for brunette.
B也可以代表"皮肤略黑的"
But Amy's the brunette.
但艾米就是皮肤略黑的
So you could do "A" for anorexic.
你可以用A代表"厌食的"
Unless it's "B" for bulimic.
还可以用B代表"贪食症"
Good point.We're gonna need a new system.
有道理.得找个新规则来区分她们了
Do you smell something?
闻到什么了吗
Yeah,what is that?
是啊 是什么
I think you do these things just to piss me off.
我认为你捣鼓这些烂事 就是想激怒我
Oh my God,what happened?
上帝啊 发生了什么事
Well,while I was trying to put it out,
当我准备灭火的时候
my brother stupidly called the fire department.
我弟弟却愚蠢地通知了消防队
Why was that stupid?
为什么是愚蠢的?
Have you seen a Malibu fireman recently?
你最近见过马里布市消防队吗
They're all young,buff surfer dudes
都是年轻的 古铜皮肤的
whippin' their big hoses around.
手舞着粗水管的玩水猛♥男♥
Amy and Beth jumped on their hook and
脏得像两只斑点狗的艾米和贝丝
ladder like a couple of Dalmatians.
跳上了他们的消防钩梯
I never saw 'em again.
之后就再没见到过她们
Ah yes,the Malibu fire department.
噢是的 马里布市消防队
I have several patients who
我有几个病人 一看见
compulsively masturbate to their calendar.
消防队的日历画 就想手♥淫♥
No kidding.
开玩笑吧
Both sexes.
男女都有
So anyway,Charlie,
总之 查理
I'm still not clear on what
我还是不清楚
it is you would like me to help you with.
你想要我怎么帮你
Uh,your anger issues,your sexual issues,
你有愤怒 性方面的问题?
your drinking? No,no,no,no,that's all cool.
或者酗酒? 不 那些都很好
Then tell me,why are you here?
那告诉我 你为什么要来这里
Okay.Well,
好吧
I'm here to lay some groundwork for the future.
我来这儿 是为将来打下某种伏笔
Some groundwork?
某种伏笔
Yeah.
是的
I've come to realize that there's
我越来越认识到 极有可能
a very good chance that I might some day snap and kill my brother.
某天我会突然爆发 杀了我弟弟
And I figure,if I'm already under a psychiatrist's care,
所以我琢磨 如果我 之前已看过心理医生
then I can always cop an insanity plea.
那就一直能拿精神失常作辩词了
You're thinking of killing your brother?
你想杀了你弟弟?
Doctor-patient confidentiality.
医生 病人 保密协议
Where's the bottle opener?
开瓶器在哪儿
Check in the drawer by the coffee machine.
看看咖啡机下面的抽屉
Hey,what do you think of this for the new drapes?
用这个做新窗帘 感觉怎样
Too small.
太小了
I don't know.I think it's kind of cheerful.
我觉得样式挺活泼
I'll put it in the maybe pile.
先放待定一类
You do that.
尽管放
You know,we're also gonna have to reupholster the couch.
我们还得给躺椅换面套
You think?
是吗
Well,there was a lot of water damage,which,quite frankly,
上面有很多水渍 毫无疑问
I think was the result of the firemen showing off for the girls.
全是消防员故意作秀给那俩妞儿看的
You could be right.
也许你是对的
You know,I just want to tell you,
知道吗 我想说
I really appreciate you stickin' by me
我很感激你这几天来
in the past couple of days,you know,
一直陪着我
pulling me out of my funk.
把我从恐慌里解救出来
You really are a great brother.
你真是我的好哥哥
I don't know what I'd do without you.
没有你 我都不知该怎么办
I don't know what I'd do without you,either.
没有你 我也不知该怎么办
But,golly,
天啊
it's sure fun to think about.
想想都爽
好汉两个半（2003）
Two and a Half Men
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