好汉两个半（2003）
Two and a Half Men S03E06
Part 3
Nov. 17, 2020, 12:15 p.m.
It's a...satanic symbol used to call for demons from hell.
它是...用来召唤恶魔的邪恶符号♥.
Oh that's not good.
噢这样可不好.
You need to cut Isabella loose.
你得离开伊莎贝拉.
I can't do that. Why not?
我不能. 为什么?
Because together we shall spawn a child named Giglamesh
因为我们要孕育个叫做"吉尔伽美什"的小子.(苏美尔人的邪神)
and he shall bring forth a new age of darkness.
而他将带来新黑暗时代.
You know what,maybe it is time
知道吗 也许是时候
to slow this relationship down a little bit.
冷却一下这段关系了.
Slow it down?You need to drive a stake through its heart!
冷却?你需要拿个木桩钉入它的心脏(制♥服♥狼人办法)!
Is she still here? Yeah
她还在这儿吗? 是啊
Okay,here's the plan.
好吧 我有个计划.
Um,so,uh,we'll submit to her will
嗯 所以 呃 我们将要服从她的意志
and,uh,serve the Lord Beelzebub with all our hearts.
并且 呃 全心全意服侍比尔泽布大人(魔王).
I'll grab Jake,you start the car.
我带上杰克 你发动好车.
We'll drive somewhere safe,I'm thinking the Vatican.
我们逃到安全的地方 我想大概是梵蒂冈.
Don't be ridiculous. What are you gonna do?
別搞笑了. 那你怎么办?
Well,you said it:we have to cut her loose.
嗯 你说过:我们要除掉她.
"We?" No,I didn't say "we."I never said "we."
"我们?"不 我没说过"我们."我从没说过"我们."
Hear us,O Horned One.
天灵灵 快显灵.
Wrap your dark wings around this young soul
魔王啊用你的黑暗翅膀裹住这个年轻的灵魂
and grant him all the rewards he desires.
并满足他所有的请求吧.
Okay,um,hi,Mr.Horned One.
好吧 嗯 嗨 长角魔王.
Here's the deal:I'll trade you my soul for...
我们做个交易:我用我的灵魂换取...
Well,what do I get,like,three wishes?
好吧 我可以得到什么 是不是 三个愿望?
He's the Lord of the Underworld,not a genie.
他是地下之主 不是精灵.
Oh,okay.Can I talk to a genie?
噢 好吧.我可以和精灵谈谈吗?
Jake,get over here!
杰克 快过来!
Sorry,Dad,but you're no longer my master.
对不起 老爸 你不再是我的主人了.
The hell I'm not!Go to your room!
不是你个头!回你的房♥间去!
You know,I'm old enough to choose my own religion.
我已经有足够年龄选择自己的宗教信仰了.
Go!
快去!
How dare you interfere?
你胆敢干涉我们?
Good question.
问得好.
Alan,tell her...how we dare.
艾伦 告诉她...我们为什么干涉.
Hey,you brought her here,you get her out.
嘿 你带来的 你带走.
Are you trying to get rid of me?
你们想摆脱我?
Ok,well,no,not-not-not you personally.
好的 嗯 不 不是...不是针对你啦.
This is more of a legal issue.
这是法律上的问题.
Uh,it turns out Malibu is not zoned for Satanic rituals.
呃 事实上是马里布地区禁止撒旦仪式.
Or any of the black arts,really.Right,Alan?
或者是任何黑暗艺术 真的.对不对 艾伦?
Uh,that's true.Uh...You're fine in Hollywood.Um...
呃 这个千真万确.你在好莱坞就不会遇到这情况.嗯...
Pretty much anywhere east to the 405 freeway actually.
实则上405国道以东任何地方都可以.
Shut up,Alan. Just trying to help.
闭嘴 艾伦. 仅仅想帮忙.
Did you really think that you could just end this?
你真的以为可以这么轻易结束?
Uh,I was kinda hopin'.
呃 我希望可以.
Don't you realize that our souls are now bound together,
你没有意识到我们现在已经心神相依
destined to writhe ecstatically in blessed hellfire for all eternity?
冥火永祝 此生不渝了吗?
Boy,I know how to pick 'em,don't I?
噢 我知道该怎么做了 是吗?
Charlie,do you remember the vows you took last night?
查理 你不记得昨晚的誓言了吗?
Vows?You took vows?What kind of vows?
誓言? 你许下了誓言?什么样的誓言?
If you'll shut up,maybe we'll find out.
如果你闭嘴 也许我会记起来.
You vowed unending fealty to the sisterhood of the coven.
你发誓效忠于十三女巫大集♥会♥的成员们.
You did that?Why would you do that?
你发过那种誓?你为什么发那种誓?
Will you please shut up.
请你闭嘴.
I did that?Why would I do that?
我发过那种誓? 我为什么发那种誓?
Did you think that all those beautiful women
你以为所有的美女
were pleasuring you because of your boyish charm?
取悅於你就是因为你有男性魅力?
Well,no,not-not-not-not all of them.
嗯 不 不是-不是-不是-不是所有人.
I just figured after the first three or four,
我是在和三到四个相处后才发现
word-of-mouth started to spread.
已经口耳相传开了.
Wait,wait,uh,
等会 等一下 呃
how many women are we talking about here?
我们所说的究竟包含多少女性?
I don't know,nine,ten...
我也不知道 9个 10个...
13,the sacred number.
13 不祥数字.
And a personal best for me.
但我却最喜欢.
How do you have sex with 13 women at one time?
你怎么能同时和13个女人做?
Well,apparently,you have take some vows.
嗯 显然 你需要发些誓才行.
okay,listen,uh,thank the girls for me,
好吧 听着 呃 替我谢谢那些女性
tell 'em I had a wonderful time,but...
就说我度过了美好的一刻 但是...
I'm gonna have to pass on the fealty stuff.
我可不会遵守那些誓言.
I have a previous commitment to,you know...God.
我有个更早的承诺 你要知道...是上帝.
It doesn't work that way,Charlie.
那可不行 查理.
If you break your vows,
如果你不遵守誓言
you bring down upon yourself the ancient curse of betrayal.
你将会被降古叛变者诅咒.
Well,that's just the chance I'll have to take.
嗯 我到愿试一试.
So be it.
就试吧.
So be it.
就试吧.
Just kidding.
开个玩笑.
Um,simply out of curiosity,
嗯 仅仅是好奇
what exactly is this curse?
究竟-究竟那个诅咒是什么?
What should I be on the lookout for?
我需...需要注意什么?
Your crops will wither in the field.
你的庄稼会在地里枯萎.
Yeah,okay.
是啊 好吧.
Your cattle will sicken and die.
你的牲畜会生病并且死亡.
Uh..ah
好吧
Your manhood will shrivel and become a useless husk.
你的男性气概会丧失殆尽变成不举的废物.
I gotta fold here,Alan.
我得屈服了 艾伦.
Okay,you got me.
好吧 你赢了.
What do you say we call the girls over
你认为把你姐妹都叫过来
and start spawning baby Giglamesh?
我们开始孵育吉尔伽美什宝宝怎么样?
Charlie,don't do this!
查理 不要这样!
Hey,when she's shriveling your husk,then you get a vote.
嘿 等你被她下咒丧失了男性气概后再发言吧.
Go ahead,call the coven.
继续 召唤十三女巫大集♥会♥吧.
you gals could make a fortune delivering pizzas.
你的姐妹送皮萨一定会大赚一笔.
Mom?
妈?
Boo,everybody.
崩 大家好.
Now,not a word,Charlie.
现在 不许反对 查理.
You are all coming with me to my costume party,
你们都得给我去化妆舞会
and I'm not taking no for an answer.
我不接受拒绝.
Evelyn?
伊夫琳?
Isabella.
伊莎贝拉
You know each other?
你们认识?
In a manner of speaking.
仅仅是浅交.
What are you doing here? Nothing.
你在这儿干什么? 没什么.
These are my sons.
他们是我儿子.
It was an accident.
只是碰巧.
I had...I had no idea.
我-我是...我是不知道.
Please believe me.
请相信我.
goodbye,Isabella.
再见 伊莎贝拉.
Yes.goodbye.
是.再见.
Bye,Charlie.
別了 查理.
Whoa,whoa,whoa,hold on,hold on.
哇哦 哇哦 哇哦 等会儿 等会儿.
What about the vows,the curse and the shriveling?
那誓言-誓言怎么办 那个诅咒和那个不举的事?
I have no idea what he's talking about.
我不知道他在说什么.
What?She's in my Pilates class.
怎么了?她是我在庞蒂乌斯班上认识的人.
I'll buy that.Okay.
我信. 好吧.
Now,are you coming to my party,
现在 你去不去我的聚会
or are you gonna give me a hard time?
还是你想让我难受?
I'm coming to the party. Me,too.
我去. 我也去.
Jake!Come get your costume!
杰克!过来拿你的戏服!
What's Mom gonna wear?Shut up.
老妈会穿什么? 闭嘴.
Let's go,grandmommy doesn't want to be late to her costume party.
快点 奶奶不想迟到哦.
Oh,come on,boys,sell it.
噢 来吧 孩子们 展示一下.
Very nice!
非常好!
Now fly,my pets,fly!
现在飞吧 我的猪猪 飞吧!
I call shotgun.
我替你们注意猎枪.
好汉两个半（2003）
Two and a Half Men
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