好汉两个半（2003）
Two and a Half Men S03E06
Part 2
Nov. 17, 2020, 12:15 p.m.
I think this woman tried to put a curse on me.
而这个女人想给我下诅咒.
Oh,please.Who of us hasn't done that?
噢 少来.谁没干过?
To know you is to curse you.
知道你就是诅咒你.
She took my hair.
她收集我头发.
She took your hair? Yeah,and then she laughed like...
她收集你头发? 是啊 接着她笑起来就像...
Oh,well,that's different.
噢 嗯 这就不同了.
So you see my concern? Yes,I do.
你知道我的担忧了? 是的 我知道了.
Good night.
晚安.
Where are you going?
你还去哪儿?
To pick up a bottle of wine and a feather duster.
去挑瓶酒和一个鸡毛掸子.
You sure my Mercedes is okay parked on the street?
你觉得我的奔驰停在街上安全吗?
I mean I gave that crack whore $10 to watch it,but now I'm thinking,
我已经给了那个邋遢妓♥女♥10美元帮我看着 但我现在担心的是
who's watching the crack whore?
谁看着那婊♥子♥?
Don't worry about your car.
別担心你的车了.
Okay.
好吧.
So were are all the guys?
男人都在哪儿呢?
How come I'm the only weenie in this pot of beans?
我是"三千佳丽"外仅存的男性?
Because this party is in your honor.
这个聚会可全是为你而开.
Really?What'd I do?
真的?我积了什么德?
You're a vessel of the masculine life force.
你就是一瓶男性生命力的容器.
You picked up on that?
你是这么想的?
I tell people that all the time and they just get snotty.
我经常这么对大家说可他们都嗤之以鼻.
These women are all my sisters.
这些人都是我的好姐妹.
They all want to please you.
她们都想取悅於你.
Well,gosh,that's swell.
嗯 糟了 我有些自鸣得意了.
Then you're okay with this?
你对此没有意见吗?
It was my idea.
这就是我的主意.
Let me tell you something,Isabella,
我告诉你吧 伊莎贝拉
you are just tops in my book.
你已被我列为重要联♥系♥人之一.
Hey,this is very tasty.
嘿 这个味道真不错.
What'd you say this was?
你们管这个叫什么?
Secret elixir.
神秘万灵药.
Secret elixir,huh?
神秘万灵药 呃?
Well,I'm usually more of a bourbon guy but,
嗯 我通常喝波旁酒
push comes to shove,I don't know what the hell's in that,either.
但问起来 我也不知道它是什么做的.
Oh,boy.
噢 天啊.
Getting a little fuzzy around the edges.
棱角有些模糊.
You got any crackers?
你有薄脆饼干吗?
He's ready.
他已经準备好了.
You bet your gothic ass I am.
以你的哥特式屁屁保证.
Whee!
哈!
Where are we going?
我们去哪儿?
To the altar room.
去祭坛室.
Oh,boy!
噢 天啊!
What's the altar room?
什么是祭坛室?
It's where we anoint you.
是我们给你施涂油礼的地方.
Oh,boy!
噢 天啊!
I'm getting anointed!
我要上油了!
Sounds nasty!
听起来挺下流的!
Anoint him.
涂油.
Anoint him.
涂油.
Anoint him.Anoint him.
涂油.涂油.
** I can't stop this feeling *
*妹纸 你只是不知道这...
** Deep inside of me *
*灵魂嗨出来的感受
** Girl,you just don't realize *
*妹纸 你只是不明白...
** What you do to me...*
*魔法湿有多寂寞...
Morning. Morning.
早啊. 早啊.
Great googly-mooglies!
我亲娘的七舅姥爷啊!
What the hell happened to you?
你怎么了?
I'm not sure.
我也不清楚.
Looks like you got bit on the face by one of them ebola monkeys.
看起来像你被患埃博拉病毒的猴子咬了一口.
I don't think so Berta.
我可不这么想 波塔.
I mean,you weren't exactly eye candy going in,but...
我的意思是 你的眼珠不在眼眶里 而是...
...now,woof!
...现在 嗷!
you could scare the flies off a manure truck.
你可以把苍蝇吓得滚落粪车.
Thank you.Until you said that,I was feeling a little self-conscious.
谢谢.在你说之前 我还感觉有些难为情.
Aw,you know I'm razzing you,don't you?
哇 你明白我是在嘲笑你 是吗?
Yeah.
是啊.
I mean,it's really not that...
我的意思是 它实则上没有...
Oh sweet Lord,I'm gonna lose my eggoes!
噢上帝啊 我的眼珠要掉了!
Okay,if open mike night in the burn ward is over,
好吧 如果真心话大考验聚会已经结束
I am just gonna make myself some breakfast
我得赶快给自己做些早餐
and get out of here before Charlie's new girlfriend gets up.
然后在查理的新女友起床前离开这里.
Why,is she not as compassionate as me?
为什么 难道她不像我一样有同情心?
She's just a very creepy woman.
她就是个怪女人.
Well,putting aside the whole pot-kettle thing,creepy how?
嗯 撇开你的问题 她怎么怪了?
Well,she's got tattoos all over her.
嗯 她全身布满纹身.
I've got tattoos.
我也有纹身.
And she's got this very dark,hostile attitude.
但她的是非常黑暗 有敌意的.
Okay,you might actually like her.
好 你大概会喜欢她.
But I just don't want to have anything to do with her.
但我-我就是不想和她扯上任何关系.
Good morning.
早啊.
Isabella.Hello.
伊莎贝拉.你好.
That's a nasty looking eye you've got there.
你的眼睛看起来挺吓人的.
It's...just a stye.
这是...个人风格.
Right?
是吗?
What else would it be?
不然会是什么?
Hey,Vampira...
嘿 女吸血鬼...
tell Count Humpula to get out of bed so I can change his sheets.
告诉汉普拉伯爵(男吸血鬼)该起床了我要换床单.
Charlie and I are spending the entire day in bed.
我和查理要整天呆在床上.
We do not want to be disturbed.
我们不想被打扰.
Do you understand?
你明白吗?
Is it getting cold in here?
怎么突然变冷了?
Do you understand?
你明白吗?
Yep,you betcha.
好啊 当然.
Thank you.
谢谢.
Bye,Alan.
走了 艾伦.
Take care of that eye.
好好养著眼睛.
I will.Thank you.
我会的.谢谢.
See what I mean about...
看到了吧...
What are you doing?
你要干什么?
Leaving.Why?
回家 为什么?
Did you see that bitch?
你难道没有看到那个婊♥子♥吗?
You got to put a whole lot of gone
你要"退避三舍"
between you and a broad like that.
和她保持距离.
But wait a sec...goodbye and good luck.
但是等一会儿...再见祝好运.
Ho!
噢!
Ho!
噢!
That is some stye.
真个性.
Oh,this is no stye.This is something else.Something evil.
噢 这不是个性.这是其它邪门的东西.
Something ugly.
真难看
And you know what,I'm starting to think your girlfriend did this.
你知道吗 我觉得是你女朋友做的.
Oh,come on.
噢 少来了.
Charlie,this isn't just about me.
查理 不仅是我这么认为.
Have you taken a look at yourself recently?
你最近没有照照自己?
Oh,man.
噢 天啊.
It's gonna take more than a little spray-on tan to fix that.
需要多喷点茶色漆才能掩饰住.
Do you realize how long you've been upstairs with her?
你有没有意识到和她在楼上呆了多长时间?
That depends.On what?
那取决於. 取决於什么?
On what day it is.
取决於今天是星期几.
It's sunday evening.
今天是星期天晚上.
I haven't seen you since last night when you went to that party.
自从昨天你去了那个聚会我就再没看到你.
Oh yeah,the party.
噢是啊 聚会.
That was some great party.
那是个很不错的聚会.
What happened?
发生了什么?
I have no idea.
我也不记得了.
Although,I did wake up with this.
尽管如此 我醒来后就有了这个.
Oh my God!
神啊!
Am I Jewish now?
我成犹太人了吗?
Charlie,that's not a star of David,it's a pentagram.
查理 那不是戴维之星 那是五角星形.
好汉两个半（2003）
Two and a Half Men
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