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Modern Family S07E21
Part 1
Nov. 28, 2019, 12:16 p.m.
谢谢 这儿有位安德鲁·杰克逊[20美元]
Hey, thank you. Here's an Andrew Jackson.
给我弄一床干净的被单
Make a clean set of sheets happen,
我就把你介绍给他双胞胎兄弟
I'll introduce you to his twin brother.
其实不用非得逗她 不过我又不会少块肉对吧
You don't have to do the banter, but what's it cost me?
曼尼 坐火车这主意太棒了
Manny, it was a great idea to come on the train.
铁路是体面旅行的最后一道堡垒了
Rail is a last bastion of respectable travel
现在机场真的是什么样的人都能去了
now that every airport has become a sweat-pant convention.
我们全家要去波特兰
We are all traveling to Portland
因为杰的前妻迪迪要再婚了
because Jay's ex-wife, Dede, is getting remarried.
我们好开心
We're so happy.
是为我们自己
For us.
这意味着我不用再付该死的赡养费了
It means the end of those damn alimony payments,
所以我要确保迪迪顺利完婚
so I'm gonna make sure Dede goes through with it.
只要"我愿意""我愿意""结束了"
It'll be, "I do", "I do", "I'm done".
兄弟 我们这趟火车上得做多少次抉择啊
Dude, how much choice action are we gonna get on this trip?
我正在调整我的期待值
I'm managing my expectations.
你一点也不了解火车吗
Don't you know anything about trains?
姑娘们都变疯了
Chicks go crazy.
颠簸会让她们兴奋
The vibrations get them all worked up.
而且她们无处可去 正好下手
Also, they're trapped, which is nice.
我们要去写给老妈的祝酒辞
We're just gonna go bang out this toast for Mom.
是啊 不能拖到最后再写
Yeah. Shouldn't have waited till the last minute.
正好可以让你分心 免得晕车
It'll be a nice distraction from your motion sickness.
没关系 只要火车前进时
It's good, as long as I'm not facing backwards
我不是背对着...天哪 不行
when the train is -- Oh, God, no.
带我走
Lead me.
好 我来吧
All right, I got it.
走吧 固定点
There you go. Fixed point.
我的天哪 不是吧
Oh, my God, it can't be.
什么 不是啦 不是秃头啦
What? No, it's not a bald spot.
我昨天晚上没睡好
I slept on it funny last night.
不是啦 两排后的那个家伙
No. The guy two rows back.
那是西蒙·黑
That's Simon Ha--
黑斯廷斯 我的...
Hastings. Oh, my --
你也是他粉丝吗
You're a fan of his, too?
他是我最喜欢的作家
He's my favorite author.
别告诉米奇尔 我读他上一本书的时候
Don't tell Mitchell, but I was so engrossed
因为太投入 有一天半忘了喂莉莉
in his last book, I didn't feed Lily for a day and a half.
等等
Wait a second.
西蒙·黑斯廷斯是
Simon Hastings is the genius behind
《锡尔弗敦》系列悬疑小说的天才作者
the Silverton mystery novels.
《仅限非会员》
"Dismembers Only."
《新鲜空气之死》
"A Death of Fresh Air."
全世界等
The world has been waiting
三部曲的最后一部
for the final book of the trilogy
得有10年了吧
for almost, what, 10 years?
我太迫不及待了 自己先写了同人小说
I missed it so much, I took a stab at writing fan fiction.
什么
What?
我把锡尔弗敦置身于房♥地♥产♥的悲惨世界
I put Silverton in the harrowing world of real estate
名字就叫《开放日·密闭之棺》
with "Open House, Closed Casket."
起鸡皮疙瘩了
Goose bumps.
很抱歉打扰您 但是您是我们最爱的作家
We hate to bother you, but you are our favorite author.
先生们 文字都是现成的
Gentlemen, the words are all out there.
我只是按能赚钱的方式排布了一下而已
I just arrange them in a financially rewarding way.
-滑稽 太滑稽了 -典型的黑斯廷斯
- Droll. Droll is what it is. - Classic Hastings.
您现在是在...
That by any chance isn't the --
写下一部锡尔弗敦的小说吗
the next Silverton novel, is it?
你们是说《云霄火车杀人事件》吗
You mean "Locomotive for Murder"?
太妙了
Crackerjack.
都还没出呢 我已经在为要读完它而伤感了
It's not even out yet, and I'm sad about finishing it.
希望不会让你们失望
Well, I hope you won't be disappointed.
很高兴认识你们
Lovely to meet you.
你一般是怎么写作的
What's your process?
人物只是通过你说话吗
Are the characters just speaking through you?
情节有多重要呢
How important is plot?
这样吧 你们安静地坐下来
Here's an idea -- how would you two like
读一读第一章怎么样
to sit quietly and read the first chapter?
什么
What?
-我的... -什么
- My... - What?
-天哪 -什么
- God. - What?
请放心
Rest assured.
我们会保护好您的宝贝
Your treasure is in good hands.
我们也是在艺术界混的
We are also members of the artistic community.
我是小丑
Clown.
我是魔术师
Magician.
不行
Nope.
为什么 我们在火车上
What? We're on a train,
我在享受这种浪漫的旅行方式啊
and I'm embracing a romantic style of travel.
我懂 我爱死了
I get it, and I love it.
维多利亚饮茶帽真不错
Wonderful Victorian tea hat.
谢谢 一流的旅行德比帽
Thank you. Top-notch travel derby.
女士 下午茶见
Ma'am. See you at high tea.
他的样子太娘了
He acts like someone with low "T".
我买♥♥口香糖的时候落了我的杂♥志♥了
Ugh, I forgot my magazines when I was buying gum.
一心两用实在太难了吧
Oh, it's hard to do two things at once.
你还有书吗
You got an extra book?
我在重读《简·爱》
Well, I'm re-reading "Jane Eyre",
但我行李架上还有本《安娜·卡列尼娜》
but I've got "Anna Karenina" on deck.
你的是什么
What you got?
《哈丽特飓风》 基本都是图片
"Hurricane Harriet". It's mostly pictures.
成交 你坐过去
Sold. Move over.
哈丽特是干嘛的
So, what's Harriet's deal?
她是个没头没脑的傻姑娘 总给人惹麻烦
She's a ditzy girl who causes problems for everyone,
但自己从来都不知道
but never realizes it.
听起来不太现实啊
Doesn't sound very realistic.
你们知道厕所在哪儿吗
Ah, do you guys know where the bathroom is?
在后面
Oh, back there.
不是那边吗
Isn't it that way?
没关系啦
Doesn't matter.
请出示头等座票
First-class ticket, please.
我只是来找厕所的
I just came looking for the bathroom.
我的票在我的座位上
My ticket is in my seat.
你知道我每天会听到多少人说这种话吗
Do you have any idea how many times a day I hear that?
坐回原位[回到自己的国家]去
Just go back where you came from.
叫我回去
Go back where I came from?
好吧
Okay.
我明白了
I see how it is.
所以哈丽特傻不愣登地把那些人送进熊洞了吗
So, Harriet just sent those people right into a bear cave?
她永远不知道自己在干什么
She never knows what she's doing.
好傻啊
What an idiot.
打扰一下
Excuse me.
介意我坐这儿吗
You mind if I sit here?
不啊
Uh, no.
你的笑容很美
You have a beautiful smile.
谢谢
Thanks.
大家都嘲笑我的帽子
They make fun of you for wearing your headgear,
但是现在看看吧
but, hey, look at me now.
出示一下票
Tickets?
是啊
Oh, yeah.
亲爱的 我的票在你那里吗
Uh, honey, do you have my ticket?
没有啊
No.
我很肯定我把我的票给你了 宝贝
I'm pretty sure I gave you my ticket, babe.
抱歉 宝贝 回站票车厢去
Sorry, babe. Back to coach.
我原谅你
I forgive you.
来找我
Come find me.
老妈一向自♥由♥自在无拘无束
"Mom has always been a free spirit."
她也帮忙释放了酒瓶里的冤魂
"She has also helped to free a lot of spirits from bottles
因为这女人是个酒鬼 记好咯
'cause the woman's a boozehound!" Hello!
我不会写这个的
Yeah, I'm not gonna put that in.
这个怎么样
Uh, how about this one?
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