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Modern Family S07E02

Part 1 Nov. 28, 2019, 12:15 p.m.

大家安安怎么样啊
Hey, all y'all. What's going down?
我对你的意见
My opinion of you.
就是戴个假眼镜是闹哪样
What's with the fake glasses?
对戴真眼镜的人来说你这样太无礼了
As an actual glasses wearer, this is offensive.
就好像没残疾的人把车停在残疾人专用车位
It's like non-disabled people who park in handicapped spaces.
我进去出来就借停了三分钟小姑娘
I was in and out in three minutes, young lady,
而且我是去拿你的针眼药
and it was your stye medication I was picking up.
手链有点多啊小子
That's a lot of bracelets there, buddy.
不用管她们是她们太胆小了
Just ignore them. They're being sheep.
如果我以前也老是在意别人说的话
If I'd listened to what other people said,
90年代我根本不可能弄那个酷炫的发型
I'd never have rocked my '90s frosted tips.
我们还有照片
We've got pictures.
才没有呢
No, we don't.
你是独一无二的儿子
You're an original, son.
上天创造你的时候没用模具做
When they made you, they broke the mold.
好吗卢邓
What's good, L.D.?
当然
Yo, will.
卢克这样问可能不太好
Luke, um, there's no easy way to ask this.
你是加入什么男团了吗
Are you in a boy band?
我们要去码头耍
So, we're gonna go hang at the pier.
你去吗
You in?
好像不错但我可能去不了
Sounds cool, but I don't know if I can.
没错我们今天有很多事情
That's right. We got a big day planned.
他要来给他老爹打工
He's coming to work with the old man.
抱歉
Sorry.
下次吧
Next time.
债贱[再见]
Deuces.
债贱
Deuces.
同意[跟你们的妈妈说吧]
Word to your mothers.
说真的大卫替我跟你妈打个招呼
Seriously, David. Tell your mom I say hi.
她来啦我们的小天才
There she is -- our little genius.
看看我认真的小姑娘
Look at my conscientious little girl
提早一天就开始准备去上大学
getting ready to leave for college a whole day early.
我今天就走
I'm leaving today.
-什么 -不要啊
- What? - No.
不不不不行我们都计划好了
No, no. No, no. We have a plan.
我打算晚餐给你做你最爱的菜
I-I was gonna make your favorite meal for dinner,
然后我们因为分离焦虑会吵架
and then we were gonna fight because of separation anxiety,
然后明天早上
and then tomorrow morning,
我们会在你离家之前又和好
we would make up before you leave for good.
-我就... -不行不行
- I just -- -Oh! No, no,
各位所以我才没有告诉你们
guys, this is exactly why I didn't tell you!
但我不能送你去学校啊我今天有房♥子开放日
But I can't take you. I have a showing.
我准备要刻离别歌♥曲盘在送你的路上放呢
I was gonna burn a CD of goodbye songs for the ride.
我对我的决定感到前所未有的满意
I have never felt better about a decision.
我学校离家里就30分钟车程
Look, I'm only 30 minutes away,
而且我过几个星期就回来了
And I'll be back in a couple of weeks.
我已经让海莉送我过去了
I already asked Haley to take me.
我该走了
Well, I better get going.
你们每个人可以抱我5秒钟
You may each hug me for five seconds.
我想告诉你你永远是我的小姑娘
I want you to know that you'll always be my little girl.
再见...
Goodbye, nor--
时间到了老妈
Time's up. Mom.
我好为你骄傲
I am so proud of you,
我知道你会取得伟大的成就
and I know you're gonna achieve great things in this world,
我最近读到有一种新甲油
and I just read about this new nail polish that changes colors
如果你把指甲放进有迷♥药♥的饮料就会变色
if you dip it in a drink that has a roofie --
-下一位 -我不用了
- Next. -I'm good.
那好吧很好
All right, cool.
我到了会给你们发短♥信♥的
Well, I will text you guys when I get there.
他的5秒钟给我
I'm taking his five seconds.
彻底悲剧没别的形容方式了
It's a tragedy -- no other way to put it.
本来多美好的一天
Such a beautiful day, too.
只要学着接受莉莉有足球比赛
We just have to accept that Lily has a soccer game
我们都得去观赛就可以了
and we all have to be there.
你早该找个借口的
You were supposed to make an excuse.
我很抱歉
I'm sorry!
我在集市上碰到小卡
I ran into Cam at the market.
他问我们能不能去我就慌了
He asked if we could go. I panicked.
我自作自受[朝自己脚开一枪]
I shot myself in the foot.
是啊你朝你的脚上开了一枪
Oh, yeah, you shot yourself on your foot,
你把脚放进自己嘴里[说错话]
You put your foot in your mouth,
你鞋子穿错脚了
you put the shoe in the wrong foot.
你们美国人为啥什么都要扯到脚啊
What is with you Americans and the foot?
顺便说一嘴我讨厌那幅画
I hate that painting, by the way.
我要去把最后一个可颂甜甜圈吃掉我太难过了
I'm having the last cronut. I'm so depressed.
抱歉孩子安迪已经给吃掉了
I'm sorry, kid. I think Andy ate it.
比赛2点开始是吗
So the game starts at 2:00, right?
是杰吃掉了最后一个可颂甜甜圈
Jay ate the last cronut.
没人喜欢告密者哦小孩
No one likes a tattletale, kid.
谢谢你这么诚实宝贝
Thank you, baby, for being so honest.
所以我们一小时后出发
So we should leave in about an hour.
什么"我们"
What is this "we"?
我得去给乔注册冬令营
I have to go and register Joe for the winter camp.
妈咪要去买♥♥鞋子
Mommy's going to buy shoes.
我可没养一个叛徒
I did not raise a rat!
没人逃得过
Nobody gets out of this.
世界上最糟糕的运动世界上最糟糕的运动员
World's worst sport, world's worst players of it.
22个小女孩挤成一团
22 girls in a cluster
像个坏掉的吸尘器一样之字形穿过球场
Zig-zagging across a field like a busted roomba.
唯一吸得起来的就是我宝贵的两小时
Except the only thing it sucks up is two hours of my life.
看吧这座卖♥♥不出去的房♥子
Behold, the unsellable house.
挂牌2年了
Two years on the market,
已经击溃了城里所有房♥地♥产♥代理人的心
It's crushed the soul of every real-estate agent in town.
陶德与泰瑞·泰勒那对卖♥♥♥房♥♥子的夫妇
Todd and Terry Taylor, the spouses selling houses --
现在都离婚了
They're no longer either.
我以前很喜欢跟着我爸爸
I used to love going to work with my dad
去他的杂货店工作弗兰克食品镇
to his grocery store, Frank's Food Town.
我喜欢看他切断了一根手指
I got to watch him crack up the deli team
把熟食窗口的人逗得捧腹大笑
by pretending to lose a finger,
他可以从橘子金字塔里抽出一个来
Or he'd pull out an orange from the pyramid
但金字塔不会倒
and somehow, it wouldn't fall.
我才不管外面的招牌说什么
I don't care what the sign out front said --
省钱才不是王道我爸才是王
Savings wasn't king. My dad was.
开放参观日
艾丽克斯走了
You know, with Alex leaving,
咱俩就有更多时间在一起了
you and I are gonna get to spend a lot more time together.
等等
Wait.
这是什么玩意儿
What the whatsit?
这是鸭蛋呢
Those are duck eggs.
好酷
Cool. So --
还记得咱俩以前老说要养小鸭子吗
Remember how you and I used to talk about raising ducklings
然后给它们建个小鸭戏团
and building them a little bird circus?
好像吧
Kind of.
你觉得我们今天要在这里待多久
How long do you think we're gonna be here today?
我喜欢你要说的东西
I like where you're going with this --
搞个限时挑战
Make it a time challenge.
我觉得我可以在...
I think I can get her done
在五小时之内卖♥♥出
in under five hours.
那样我们应该有足够的时间去蹦床公园了
That'll leave us time to get to the trampoline park.
对了惊喜
Oh, and surprise.
我们要去蹦床公园了
We're going to the trampoline park.
啵嘤[弹跳声]
Boing!
他这一生将会被...
His life will be rem--
不对
No.
最近家里很忙
So, busy time at the house lately.
有趣的忙
Fun busy.
我接了一些工作
I've taken on some work
帮人们处理财产和遗嘱
helping people with estates and wills.
比我想象中要更悲伤
It's sadder than I thought it would be.
有趣的悲伤