摩登家庭

Modern Family S07E18

Part 1 Nov. 28, 2019, 12:16 p.m.

我最爱的美女好啊
There is my favorite girl!
我好激动可以周末一起去做水疗哦
I'm so excited about our SPA weekend!
我也是
Oh, me too.
如果你们到了那边还记得的话
If you think of it while you're there,
我的防晒粉马上就不够用了
I'm dangerously low on sunscreen powder.
粉
Powder?
等十年后你的脸变成老苹果的时候
You know, you won't be smirking 10 years from now
你就笑不出来了
when your face looks like an old apple.
我首次得到出任普里契特橱柜CEO的奖励
I just got my first perk as C.E.O. Of Pritchett's Closets.
我承包的水疗馆项目完成了
I finished a big job for a spa,
他们为了感谢我
and as a thank-you,
给了我两个免费水疗周末的名额
they sent me a free weekend for two.
但菲尔太怕痒了不能接受按♥摩♥
Phil's too ticklish for massages, though.
可我不会
But I am not!
我听说好多明星都去那里
I heard it's the place where all the stars go
往脸上倒热泥巴
to get hot mud poured into their faces.
我只是等不及要看这位的素颜了
I just can't wait to see this one without makeup.
如果你看到了那将是你死前见到的最后画面
You do, it will be the last thing that you will ever see.
我还记得我第一次获得的工作奖励
I remember my first big perk for a job well-done.
我给《家有阿福》的主创升级了柜子
I had upgraded some closets for guy who created "ALF".
六周以后我看节目里
And six weeks later, I'm watching the show.
阿福狂骂的一个帅哥邮递员
There's ALF sassing this handsome mailman
就叫杰·普里契特
named Jay Pritchett.
我还录下来了呢
I still got it on Betamax.
我记得我们第一次约会时你就给我看过
I remember. You showed it to me on our first date.
杰准备好一起去看拳击比赛了吗
Jay, you ready to watch the, uh, fight together?
好啊
Yep.
就我们两个
Just two of us.
我本来把今天晚上都计划好了
I had the perfect night planned --
我一个人付费观看拳击比赛
alone, pay-per-view boxing --
爱尔兰的骄傲[酒]对战古巴的轰动[雪茄]
The pride of Ireland versus a Cuban sensation.
在拳击场里也在我的血液里
In the ring and in my bloodstream.
结果歌♥洛莉亚和米奇尔掺和进来了
Then Gloria and Mitchell got involved.
杰小卡也要看拳击赛
Jay, Cam is gonna watch the fight, too.
你们何不一起看呢
Why don't you two watch it together?
太好了不然小卡只能一个人去酒吧看了
Oh, good, because Cam was just gonna watch from a bar by himself.
我好喜欢简直像你们俩来了场约会
I love it. It's gonna be like you have a date!
我不知道怎么回事但每次我和杰独处
I don't know what it is, but Jay gets uncomfortable
他都会觉得不自在
when it's just the two of us.
然后害我也觉得不自在
And then I get uncomfortable,
总感觉有必要说点什么
and I feel like I have to say something.
完美
Perfect.
今天是希♥特♥勒♥的生日
Today's Hitler's birthday.
米奇尔我们走了
Mitchell, we're going!
菲尔人呢电影院里的座位肯定坐满了
Where is Phil? The theater's gonna be packed.
亲爱的你的书呆子朋友在等你
Honey, your nerd friend is waiting.
谁敢召唤我的大名
Who dare invoke my name?
撤退信♥号♥♥来了
That's my cue.
是我你的毁灭者
It is I, your destroyer!
莉莉你确定不跟我们一起去看电影吗
Lily, you sure you don't want to go to the movies with us?
最后问你一次哦
Last chance.
讲什么的来着
What is it about again?
《无限的守护者们》讲述的是
The Defenders of Infinity are heroes
从几个不同时间流来的英雄
from several different time streams
一不小心进入了未来但却不知道...
that make their way into the future without --
并不是真的未来
Um, it's not really the future
因为时间流都是共存的
since the streams have always coexisted.
不要这样别把我当成"脑叶人"
Don't do that. Don't treat me like I'm a lobotomorph.
莉莉你不会想去的
Lily, you don't want to go.
你将会是全影院唯一的女孩
You'll be the only girl in the theater.
好了你们该走了
All right, you guys should head out.
我们很想走了
We would love to.
不用担心
Oh, and don't worry.
莉莉的保姆把今晚计划得满满的
Lily's babysitters have a big night planned --
拼图乒乓球桌游
puzzles, ping-pong, board games.
现在还是"让曼尼赢吧不然他该哭了"计划吗
Are we still in that "Let Manny win or he cries" Phase?
不是
No.
我们该走了我们要不要通过不同时间流走
We should get going. Are we taking separate time streams?
当然如果我们想昨天到达的话
Sure, if we want to get there yesterday.
这一盆绿苹果可真让人放松
Ah, there's something so relaxing about a bowl of green apples.
我已经把烦恼都忘掉了
I already forgot all my problems.
你听到了吗
Did you hear that?
-什么 -就是啊
- What? - Exactly.
我们在所有抽屉上都用了静音滑道
We used WhisperQuiet gliders in all the drawers.
减少了不少"柜噪"
Oh, really cuts down on C.N.
那是我们这行的术语意思是"柜子噪音"
It's industry jargon for "Closet noise."
这个降噪技术能用到人身上吗
Does that technology work on people, too?
你说得对我保证不会再三句话不离本行了
You're right. I promise -- No more shop talk.
是谁啊
What is this?
家里的烟雾警报响了
Our smoke alarm went off at home.
我相信不是什么大事
I'm sure it's nothing,
还是给卢克打个电♥话♥确认一下吧
but I'm still gonna call Luke just in case.
直接转到语♥音♥信箱了
And it's straight to voicemail.
曼尼我们看到烟雾警报响了
Hello, Manny. We saw that the smoke alarm went off.
你没事吧
Are you okay?
天啊卢克的留言信息是
Oh, God. Luke's outgoing message
又长又稍稍有点性别歧视的说唱
is a long and vaguely sexist rap.
好的宝贝保持优秀
Okay, Papi. Stay perfect!
一切都好
Everything is okay.
他们在烤饼干呢结果烤糊了一批
They were baking cookies and they burned a batch.
好吧
All right.
不过我们家烤箱明明是坏的
Except our oven isn't working.
曼尼从来不撒谎的不如这样吧
Manny would never lie. You know what?
我打电♥话♥叫个俄♥国♥按♥摩♥师
I am gonna call for a Russian masseuse.
他们的手非常有劲儿都是拧衣服练出来的
Their hands are very strong from wringing laundry.
你考虑一下
Think about it.
他们当时急着赶我们出家门
They were very eager to get us out of the house.
他们肯定有什么阴谋
They're up to something.
你疑心太重了
You are too suspicious.
你太轻信别人了
And you are too trusting!
今年卢克已经被警♥察♥抓过
Luke's already been arrested this year.
几周前他喝啤酒还被我们撞见
A few weeks ago, we caught him with beer.
我刚刚的说唱都比他好
Even that's a better rap.
我听到卢克的名字好几次却没提过曼尼
I'm hearing a lot of Luke's name and none of Manny.
你觉得曼尼不会趁你不注意的时候
You don't think Manny's up to the same things
也在一起搞鬼吗
when you're not paying attention?
你疯了曼尼讨厌啤酒
You're crazy. Manny hates beer.
那就是果香博若莱红葡萄酒
A fruity Beaujolais then.
你想干嘛就干嘛
You can do whatever you want.
我去看看我家孩子
I'm gonna go check on my kid.
我好讨厌这些滑道都没法摔出点气势
I hate how good those gliders are!
我好兴奋感觉自己像个小少年
I am so excited. I feel like a teenager.
我也是但是作为古人托尔夫的我
Me too. Although, as Torf the Ancient,
已经从巨星爆♥炸♥到七月联盟中
I have seen everything from the Great Star Explosion
阅尽世间万物了
to the Seven Moon Alliance.
克莱尔说对了没有姑娘
Claire was right. No girls.
菲尔
Phil?
詹姆斯
James!
你好呀
What's up?
我去年卖♥♥给这位酷哥一栋山间小屋
I sold this cool cat a house in the hills last year.
从那以后他的青草地乡村乐队就飞黄腾达了
Since then, his bluegrass band has really taken off.
特别疯狂我们开始是想讽刺才搞乐队
It's so crazy. We started doing it ironically,
结果不知不觉的竟然真的做起来了
and before we knew it, we were actually doing it for real.
90年代的时候我也经历过
That happened to me in the '90s
想说"抱歉" 结果真被"抱"了
with saying, "Exsqueeze me."
从你的古人托尔夫造型
Well, I assume from your Torf the Ancient costume,
-和你的苍白奴隶造型中看出来 -我这不是造型
- and your pale slave getup... - Not a costume.
你们是来看《无限的守护者们》的
hat you guys are here to see "Defenders of Infinity."
没错
Oh, yeah!
超级好看
Oh, it is so incredible!