摩登家庭
Modern Family S07E13
Part 4
Nov. 28, 2019, 12:16 p.m.
for those creaky floorboards in the middle of the night.
脚步沉重的出去 轻盈的回来
Heavy-footed going one way, light coming back.
难道汤米加入他们是为了构建三人家庭
Was it Tommy joining his chums for a menage a trois,
然后每晚和威尔克森夫人交换床位
then being replaced by Mrs. Wilkerson on the couch?
好吧 你需要 帮助
Okay, you need... help!
该死的
Son of a bitch.
这玩意一上午了废了我两把剪刀
I broke two saw blades on this thing,
现在这把神剪也快完蛋了
and now these miracle shears are no good.
在门口卖♥♥给我剪刀那家伙
Guy who sold me these at the front door
用它剪开了马蹄铁
cut through a horseshoe.
坚持住 我们来试试碎纸机
Hold on. Let's try your shredder.
这东西怎么会在这儿
What's that doing down here anyway?
我对乔的一些不重要的美术作品
I made an executive decision
做出了一项处理决定
about some of Joe's lesser artwork.
帮我把它抬起来
Help me lift this thing.
这个管用
Hey, it's working!
这是市面上能用钱买♥♥到最好的碎纸机
The best shredder money can buy.
2004年 我们机密的阻滞技术文件
In 2004, our whisper-close hamper technology
被人从垃圾桶里翻出来 放到黑市上卖♥♥了
got stolen out of the trash, got sold on the dark web.
绝不能再次发生
Never again.
不 卡住了
Oh, no, it's stuck!
我回来了
Hola!
你这么早就回来了
Hey, you're back early, huh?
是啊 我不想回到商店里触景生情
Yeah, I didn't want to go back to that store
再为那件事生气
and get angry again.
我只想好好放松下
I just want to relax.
也是
Yeah.
曼尼
Manny!
怎么了 妈妈
Uh, yes, Mama?
你能帮我准备下洗澡水
Can you please draw me a bath
放点你的浴盐进去吗
with those fancy bath salts that you have?
那些高级浴盐是留给特殊场合
Oh, I usually save those for spec--
赶紧去准备洗澡水
Just draw the damn bath.
我帮你倒杯好酒你边泡边喝吧
I'll get you a nice glass of wine to go with it.
-好啊 -开心点 亲爱的
- Oh, okay. - Come on, honey,
我这有瓶白葡萄酒你肯定会喜欢
I got a nice Chardonnay out here you're gonna like.
斯黛拉在门外吗
Is that Stella?
肯定不是
No, definitely not.
你给我带什么来啦
What did you bring?
歌♥洛莉亚 等等
Gloria, wait.
歌♥洛莉亚 先别生气
Gloria, don't be mad.
肯定是爱丽丝姑姑那个老妖婆
It must have been that old witch, Auntie Alice!
她肯定是想先用这个警告我
She must have left this as a warning!
恶婆娘
Devious.
好了 这下上面也有我的指纹了
Dang it, I got my fingerprints all over it now.
我敢打包票车胎也是她扎坏的
I bet she was the one who gave me that flat tire.
给谁打电♥话♥呢
Who are you calling?
[西班牙语]
谁啊
Who was that?
她要付出代价了
She's going to pay.
你都不确定到底是不是她
You don't even know it was her.
不管怎么样 你先叫那人住手
Whatever that was, you got to call it off.
肯定是她 她眼神看着就不对劲
I know it was her. I saw the evil in her eyes.
万一人家有白内障呢
She probably has cataracts.
好吧 歌♥洛莉亚 是我♥干♥的
Oh, for God's sake, Gloria, I did it.
人形板是我偷的
I stole the cutout.
是你
You?
看那些男的在那猥琐地合影我就不爽
I didn't love the way those guys were taking pictures with it.
杰 但你从来不会这样吃醋的啊
Jay, but you've never been jealous like this.
一开始看到是不会吃醋
Well, when we first met,
但他们天天把你的牌子放在那
but then I realized it's a full-time job.
是我不好
I'm sorry.
想保护自己的老婆有什么不好的呢
There's nothing wrong with being protective of your wife.
这意味着你在乎我啊
It means that you care.
这会儿不会有人去对那老太太做什么吧
Is something bad happening to that poor woman?
细节我也不知道 我都交给他们去办了
I don't know details. I let them decide.
他们那帮人不喜欢被指手画脚
They don't like to feel managed.
求求你赶紧叫他们停手吧
I'm begging you to make that call!
爱丽丝姑姑还来过我们高中做过讲座呢
Auntie Alice spoke at Career Day at my high school!
你好
Hello?
没 我们没订花啊
No, we didn't order flowers.
就是他们 就说不要郁金香
That's them. Tell them no tulips.
不要郁金香
Uh, no tulips.
他们挂了
They hung up.
还好老娘记得这些黑话
Good thing that I remembered the code.
好了 我的老醋坛子
Okay, now, my big jealous man,
咱们喝点酒去吧
let's go and have some wine.
我也不知道为什么会对人形板耿耿于怀
I don't know why that cutout bugged me so much.
也许退休后我太闲了才有空吃醋
I guess probably because I have more time now to be jealous.
好了好了 你闲的话就把我带上楼去
Okay, now, you have more time to take me upstairs
给我演示下
and show me what those
那些臭男人都在商店对我做了什么吧
bad men were doing to me at the store.
我又重新爱上退休生活了
I'm getting back to liking retirement.
我是让你说的不要玫瑰 对吧
I told you to say no roses, right?
你说郁金香
Tulips!
应该差不多啦
I'm sure it's fine.
这是你要的威士忌
Here's the scotch you asked for.
我还有些话想跟你说
And also, there's something else.
我要把滑板车退回去了
I'm returning the hoverboard.
好吧 发♥票♥应该在盒子里
Fine. I-I think the receipt was in the box.
好的 行
Okay. Well, good.
因为我希望得到的尊重和肯定
Because I can't accept a gift if it's just a shiny
不是这种高级玩具能替代的
servo-controlled substitute for respect and appreciation.
看看我吧 克莱尔
I'm not invisible, Claire.
你老公是一位强壮能干的
You married a strong and capable man who --
你能帮我把链子解开吗
Can you help me with this clasp?
克莱尔
Claire?
亲爱的
Honey?
别 别哭啊
No. Don't cry.
你非要我留着也不是不可以啊
I-I can, uh -- I can keep it if you want.
反正也没法退 都有磨损了
I-I can't return it anyway. I already dented it.
不 不是这事
No, it's not that. It's -- it's not.
是工作的事 我压力好大
It's just all of this. I'm so stressed.
菲尔 我从没当过老板
Phil, I've never been a boss before,
我都要疯了
and I am freaking out.
但目前为止你表现得很棒啊
But you've been handled it so well.
都是装出来的 我自己都不知道在做什么
I am faking it, Phil. I have no idea what I'm doing.
我只是在模仿我爸
I'm just copying my dad --
牛排啊 威士忌啊 还有雪茄
the steak, the scotch, the cigars.
你知道我的胃有多烧得慌吗
Do you have any idea how bad the heartburn is?
但你才刚上手啊 慢慢来
But you just got here. Give it a little time.
哪有时间慢慢来 我现在是老大
There is no time. I'm in charge now.
我每天都活在恐惧中
And I live every day in constant fear
生怕被人发现我自欺欺人
of everyone discovering that I'm a fraud.
我的天 我果真是个强势的白人男性
Oh, my God, I really am a powerful white male!
听着 你没有自欺欺人
Hey, you are not a fraud.
我连坐上我爸椅子的
I haven't had the guts
胆儿都没有
to sit at my dad's desk since he left.
我依然觉得自己只是当年
I still feel like the little girl
那个在桌子底下玩躲猫猫的小姑娘
who used to play hide-and-seek under it.
听着
Look.
现在这是你的桌子了
This is your desk now.
是你应得的
You've earned it.
你不是当年那个小姑娘了
You are not a little girl anymore.
事实上 你是我认识的
In fact, you're the strongest,
最强大最聪明的女人
smartest woman I know.
维持咱们一大家子生活起居是最难的事业
The hardest company in the world to run is Dunphy Co.,
你都能坚持22年
and you've kept us in business for 22 years.
我一点也不担心你工作受阻
I don't worry about you in this job.
我还担心那些笨蛋追赶你的步伐太辛苦呢
I worry about the poor chump who has to follow you.
克莱尔 人都到齐可以开会了
Everyone is here for your meeting, Claire.
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