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Modern Family S07E01
Part 5
Nov. 28, 2019, 12:15 p.m.
And drove the golf cart off the little bridge into the lake.
我永远无法忘记那位驻场选手对我说的话
I'll never forget what the club pro said to me.
"普里契特先生 你不是个好的高尔夫球手
"Mr. Pritchett, you're not a very good golfer.
回去干♥你♥的正经工作吧"
Go back to your day job."
我知道我不是个好画家 爸
I know I'm not a good painter, dad.
我 我只是希望在回去工作前
I -- I was just hoping to feel a little bit better
先让自己感觉好一些
Before going back to work.
你只有回去工作了 才会感觉好一些
You're not gonna feel better until you go back to work.
米奇尔 你是个出色的律师
Mitchell, you're a great lawyer.
继续去当律师吧
Go do that.
还有去把头发剪剪
And get a haircut.
听着 我听说你发现了
So, listen, um, I heard that you found out
我那天其实去了海滩
That I was at the beach that day.
是啊
Yeah.
我之前不知道你对我是那种感觉
I didn't know you felt that way about me.
如果那时候知道就好了
Would have been nice to know.
那时如果知道你对我也有感觉就好了
Well, it would have been nice to know you had feelings for me.
那样 很多事情都会变得无比美好
A lot of things would have been nice.
你现在对我有感觉吗
Do you have feelings for me now?
海莉 我已经订婚了
Haley, I'm engaged.
你没有正面回答我
That's not an answer.
你为什么选择现在来谈这事啊
Why are you picking now to talk about all this?
因为我担心你这样
Because I'm worried about all this.
什么啊 我的体重吗
What? My weight?
拜托 我分分钟就能减肥成功
Please. This will drop off in a second.
安迪 你觉不觉得有这么一种可能
Andy, don't you think that there is a chance
就是你现在暴饮暴食
That you have been eating
是因为你后悔跟贝丝订婚了
Because you regret getting engaged to Beth?
我为什么要后悔啊 贝丝超赞的
Why would I do that? Beth is amazing.
贝丝是个试图点燃我头发的神经病
Beth is a psycho who tried to light my hair on fire.
然而 迪兰现在正在后院
Meanwhile, Dylan is in the backyard
试图用小棍棒做个盘子呢
Trying to make a plate out of sticks.
至少他知道自己想要什么 然后就努力去追求了
Well, at least he knows what he wants and goes for it.
那我觉得我们没在一起真是好事呢
Then I guess it's a good thing that we didn't get together.
真是我做过的最明智的决定
Best decision I ever made!
我也是
Samesies!
我不打算说谎 菲尔
I'm not gonna lie, Phil.
我或许不得不插手了
I might need to get back into that.
桑杰
Sanjay!
天啊 我无法承受再次道别
Oh, god. I can't say goodbye again.
我们不必道别的
We don't have to.
我们这个决定是根据统计数据而做出的
We're basing this decision on a statistic.
86%的异地恋都以失败告终 对吧
86% of long-distance relationships end in failure, correct?
当然对了
Of course "correct."
你向来都不会错误引用数据的
You'd never misquote a statistic.
你也不会的
And neither would you.
我们有哪方面是在落后的那86%的群体中啊
When have we ever been in the bottom 86% percentile of anything?
从没有 那样我情愿去死
Never. I'd kill myself.
我们属于那顶尖的1%
We're in the top 1%.
没错 我只用了一个下午就学会了画画
Exactly. I learned how to paint in an afternoon.
昨晚 我开♥发♥了一个App
Last night, I developed an app
可以从大学里远端喂我的鱼
to feed my fish from college.
如果说有人能异地恋成功 那就是你和我了
If anyone can make this work, it's you and me.
天啊 我好爱数字
God, I love numbers.
我也好爱数字
I love numbers too.
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