欢乐合唱团（2009）

Glee S02E15

Part 2 Nov. 17, 2020, 9:07 a.m.

I'm not stupid. It's obviously getting ready
我可不傻它很显然已经准备好
to bring me my baby.
给我送子了
I know where babies come from.
我知道小孩子都从哪儿来
And that's when I realized you were right.
就在那一刻我就意识到你是对的
Let's go. Health and wellness Jazzercise class!
让我们一起律动吧保健爵士有氧律动课
Do we feel our hearts pumping yet, guys?
大家是不是感受到我们的心在跳跃啊
You see? We have really got to educate these kids.
明白了吧我们真得给这些孩子好好上一课了
How are we going to do that without being too graphic?
如果不用图解怎样才能跟他们讲明白呢
Breathe it in.
吸气
I want to educate them, not titillate them.
我想要教育他们不是想撩起他们的欲望
Didn't you ever read Jessica Seinfeld's cookbook?
你有没有读过杰西卡·宋飞的烹饪书啊
It's all about taking vegetables and hiding it in food
讲的是如何才能把蔬菜藏到食物里
so that you can trick kids into eating what's good for them.
这样的话就能骗孩子们吃那些有营养的食物
Shake it!
摇起来啊
Ah! And loose.
再放松
I'm not following.
我没跟上
It's Jazzercise, Will. It's really not that hard.
这可是有氧爵士操不怎么难啊
No. Grease it.
不是摇起来啊
I'm still talking about the vegetable hiding.
我还想讨论怎样藏蔬菜的问题
All I'm saying is
我的意思是
all we have to do is find a way to sneak in
我们需要找到一个途径偷偷地
the sex education lesson in a less provocative way.
将性教育变得不那么诱惑人心
And stretch.
伸展
You guys were awesome. Yeah!
你们真是太棒了
How good do we feel?
感觉舒不舒服
Are we sweating? Yes.
我们都流汗了吗流了
Next week, we are going to talk
下周我们将介绍一些
about the power of muscle testing.
关于肌肉力量的测试
Yeah? Bye. Love you.
好吧再见各位我爱你们
Okay. Here's what I think you should do.
我觉得你应该这么做
Let me come into Glee Club this week
下周让我去参加你们欢乐合唱团的排练
and I'll show you what I mean.
我会告诉你怎么做的
The kids will think that they're getting ready for Regionals,
孩子们会以为他们是在为地区赛做准备
but really I'll slip in a little lesson
但实际上我会给他们上一堂
about how to avoid STDs.
关于如何防止性病传播的科普课程
And speaking of STDs, how is your dating life?
说到防治性病你性生活还好吧
Um, right now, I'm the president of the Celibacy Club.
现在我是禁欲俱乐部的主席
That's a waste of some fine man-butt.
真是浪费了你的小翘臀
Sexy.
性感
I really hope that's not one of the requirements for Regionals,
这不是参加地区赛的强制要求吧
because with Berry in those tights,
如果让贝里穿紧身裤上场
we don't stand a chance.
咱们可就死定了
No, this isn't about Regionals.
跟地区赛没关系
I'm less worried about that right now
比起担心什么地区赛
and more worried about the fact that it's become clear to me
我现在更担心的是
that some of you have been lacking
你们其中一些人对某些知识的匮乏
when it comes to understanding the...
尤其是一些...
the, uh...
一些...
the intricacies of adult relationships.
深奥的成人知识
Yeah, anyways...
总之...
Along with preparing for our Regional next week,
下周我们除了准备地区赛
I want to spend the week educating ourselves
同时还要试着学习一些
about some of these... intricacies.
那个...某些深奥的成人知识
Is this the appropriate forum for that?
你真的觉得这样做合适吗
Look, whenever we had, uh,
听着每当我们有...
issues in the past that are on our minds or giving us problems,
每当我们想到或者遇到什么难题
it's always helped us to sing about it.
我们都用歌♥唱来释放
So this week I have invited a special guest.
所以这周我有一位特邀嘉宾
Miss Holiday.
霍利戴老师
Hola, clase.
童鞋们好呀
Oh, no. It's the salad lady.
不是吧又是那个玩黄瓜的老师
Okay. So sex...
好的说到性...
It's just like hugging, only wetter.
跟拥抱差不多只不过湿了点
Yeah, it is.
的确
Okay, so let's start with the basics. Finn.
好的咱们从头开始芬恩
Is it true that you thought you got your girlfriend pregnant via hot tub?
你真的以为你和你女朋友一起洗澡就能怀孕?
I have always been dubious.
我也一直有点怀疑来着
And Brittany,
还有布里特妮
you think that storks bring babies?
你真的以为宝宝都是白鹳带来的吗
I get my information from Woody Woodpecker cartoons.
我从动画片《啄木鸟伍迪》里看的
Well, that's all gonna end right here, right now.
骗小孩儿的说法到此为止
Because today, we are gonna get under the covers all together
因为今天咱们就一探究竟
and get the ditty on the dirty.
再来点黄色歌♥曲
I'm so turned-on right now.
我现在都"鸡动"了
Uh, what about those of us who choose to remain celibate?
那我们这些想禁欲的人呢
Oh, well, I admire you.
我尊重你们
Although I think you're naive and possibly frigid,
虽然你们很幼稚没准儿还有点性冷淡
I do admire your choice.
我还是尊重你们的选择
I think this is a good time for a song.
我想现在该唱歌♥了
Oh, yes. Okay.
对了好的
Okay. Rule number one.
好的第一条要讲的是
Every intimate encounter that you're ever going
人生中的每一次亲密接触
to have in your life is going to start with...
都是从...
a touch. Hit it!
触摸开始伴奏
**No one in sight*
*举目无人影
**And we got so much to share*
*同是天涯沦落人
**Talking's fine*
*聊天虽怡情
**If you got the time*
*难免扫人兴
**But I ain't got the time to spare*
*有花堪折直须折
**Do you want to touch*
*你想摸我吗
**Do you want to touch*
*你想摸我吗
**Do you want to touch me there*
*你想摸这里
**Where*
*还是哪里
**Do you want to touch*
*你想摸我吗
**Do you want to touch*
*你想摸我吗
**Do you want to touch me there*
*你想摸这里
**Where*
*还是哪里
**There, yeah*
*摸那里
**Every girl and boy*
*不管男孩女孩
**Needs a little joy*
*偶尔需要放纵
**All you do is sit and stare*
*听我唱首十♥八♥摸♥
**Beggin' on my knees*
*伸手摸姐白膝湾
**Baby, won't you please*
*宝贝你能否
**Run your fingers through my hair*
*伸手摸姐乌云丝
**My, my, my, whiskey and rye*
*来点威士忌还有大麦酒
**Don't it make you feel so fine*
*感觉飘飘而欲仙
**Right or wrong*
*对或不对
**Don't it turn you on*
*你有感觉了吗
**Can't you see we're wasting time, yeah*
*不要再浪费时间
**Do you want to touch*
*你想摸我吗
**Do you want to touch*
*你想摸我吗
**Do you want to touch me there*
*你想摸这里
**Do you want to touch*
*你想摸我吗
**Do you want to touch*
*你想摸我吗
**Do you want to touch me there*
*你想摸这里
**Where? There? *
*哪里? 那里
**Do ya, do ya*
*你想吗你想吗
**Do ya, do ya*
*你想那个吗你想吗
**Touch me there*
*摸那里
**You know where*
*你知道是哪里
**Do ya, do ya*
*你摸吗摸吗
So just remember
你们记好了
whenever you have sex with someone,
不管和谁发生性关系
you're having sex with everyone they've ever had sex with.
都等于和他之前所有的床伴发♥生♥关♥系♥
And everybody's got a random.
千万不要抱侥幸心理
Don't you think it's time for the Warblers
你说林莺是不是该唱首
to do a Joan Armatrading medley?
琼· 阿马特雷丁的歌♥曲串烧?
Um, I'm not so sure people know who that is.
我觉得大家可能没听说过这人
Well, well, if it isn't my sweet, sweet Porcelain.
这不是我的小甜甜瓷娃娃吗
Coach Sylvester.
西尔威斯特教练