消消气（2000）
Curb Your Enthusiasm S09E04
Part 2
Oct. 3, 2020, 1:49 p.m.
Let me show you one, a painting I just sold.
让我带你看看其中一个我刚刚卖♥♥掉的画
- I'm very excited. - Then maybe you could explain
-我非常兴奋 -那么可能你可以解释一下
the mystery of that one.
那一件的神秘之处
I will. This is one of my favorites.
我会的 这是我最喜欢的其中一个
Yeah, so I sold this to a restaurant,
是的 所以我把它卖♥♥给了一家餐厅
and I'm really proud of it.
而且我非常自豪
- Who is that? - It's a self -portrait.
-这是谁？ -这是一幅自画像
That's you?
那是你吗？
What do you think a self -portrait means? Yeah, that's me.
你认为这个自画像是什么意思？是的 那是我
That's like you from 50 years ago!
像是50年前的你
- No, this is me now. - What?
-不 这是现在的我 -什么？
You honestly feel you look like that?
你真心觉得你像这样的吗？
You know what?
你知道吗？
I think I want a portrait by Richard Lewis.
我想我想要一幅理查德路易斯的画
Yeah, well, look, he's gonna make you look great.
是的 呃 看 他会让你看上去很棒
Maybe you could paint me with hair.
或许你可以画一个有头发的我
- Hey. - Hey!
-嘿 -嘿！
Did you hear about Marty Funkhouser's nephew, Kenny?
你听说过马蒂冯克豪瑟的侄子吗？肯尼
- Yeah. - He died.
-是的 -他死了
- Unbelievable. - It's so sad.
-难以置信 -太难过了
- I know. - He was supposed to be going to Stanford.
-我知道 -他应该去斯坦福的
- Yeah. - You heard what happened, right?
-是的 -你听说了发什么了什么 对吗？
- He got mixed up with a prostitute. - Prostitute, right.
-他和一个妓♥女♥混在了一起 -妓♥女♥ 是的
- Mm -hmm. - Followed her to Europe.
-嗯 嗯 -跟她去了欧洲
- Yeah. - Ended up going to Pamplona to run with the bulls.
-是的 -和公牛一起跑 结束在了潘普罗纳
- And got trampled. - I know.
-被踩踏了 -我知道
How does a young boy get involved with a prostitute?
这个年轻的孩子是怎么跟一个妓♥女♥搭上的？
Well, I can only surmise
呃 我只能猜测
that he was in need of a prostitute for some reason,
是他因为什么原因需要一个妓♥女♥
he met with the prostitute, and he was in love with her
他遇到了这个妓♥女♥ 爱上了她
and followed her over there.
并且跟随她去了那里
- How do you know these details? - I'm just putting two and two together.
-你怎么知道这些细节的？ -我只是根据事实推断的
- Where's the two and two? - Well, two and two... you got a high school senior,
-事实在哪里？ -呃 事实...你有一个高中生
he has an experience with a prostitute,
他和妓♥女♥有过一腿
and then is so enamored, that he...
而且他非常迷恋她 然后他
he follows her all the way to Spain.
跟她一路去了西班牙
Again, very detailed.
我还是得说 太详细了
No, I'm just putting two and two together, that's all.
不 我只是根据事实推断 仅此而已
Again, I don't see the two and two.
再一次 我没看到什么是事实
Oh, there's two and there's another two.
哦 这是事实那是另一个事实
- It's one and one together. - It doesn't really add up.
-这是一和一加在一起 -这不是真的加在一起
- Honestly. It's too much. - It's shocking.
-说真的 太复杂了 -令人震惊
- It's shocking. - He got trampled to death.
-令人震惊 -他被踩死了
Well, that's not so shocking.
呃 那倒并不太让人震惊
You're running with the bulls.
你和公牛赛跑
It'd be shocking if he didn't die.
他不死我才震惊呢
- That's... that's the shock. - What?
-这...这才是令人震惊之处 -什么？
It's what men do. They want to impress girls,
男人就是这样的 他想要令女生印象深刻
so they do crazy stuff like that.
所以他做那样疯狂的事情
He wanted to impress the prostitute?
他想要让妓♥女♥印象深刻？
Yeah, usually, you don't have to impress a prostitute.
是的 通常 你不必令一个妓♥女♥印象深刻
Well, remember... remember when we were dating
呃 记得...记得我们两个约会的时候吗
and we went horseback riding,
我们去骑马
and I galloped and almost fell off?
我在狂奔 几乎要摔下来了
I was just trying to impress you.
我只是想要令你印象深刻
Yeah, but she's not a prostitute.
是的 但是她并不是一个妓♥女♥
- But I was having sex with her. - But you weren't paying her for it.
-但我想和她发♥生♥关♥系♥ -但你并没有付钱给她
- Okay. - Right, right.
-好吧 -对的 对的
- Oh. - Marty, I am so sorry.
-哦 -马蒂 我非常抱歉
- So sorry to hear about Kenny. - Thank you, thank you.
听到肯尼的事情太遗憾了 谢谢你 谢谢你
Really sorry.
非常抱歉
It's the worst thing that's happened to me in my life.
这是我生命中发生的最糟糕的事情
- I mean, he's like a son I never had. - Mm.
-我是说 他就像我从没有过的儿子一样 -嗯
Although, my daughter is transitioning.
虽然 我的女儿在转变性别
- Ah. How's that going? - So far, so good.
-啊 她怎么样了 -目前来说还不错
You know, I saw her a couple of weeks ago. She looked pretty good.
你知道吗我几个礼拜前见过她 她看上去很棒
- Yeah, well, she's a he now, so. - Yeah, he.
-是的 呃 所以 她现在是他了 -是的 他
When... when does she get the penis?
什么时候...什么时候他有了小♥弟♥弟♥？
He's talking about it. It takes time to decide.
他正在考虑这件事 这花费时间来决定
Well, if he gets the penis, do they throw in the balls?
呃 如果他有了小♥弟♥弟♥ 他们会把蛋蛋也加上吗？
Marty, I'm so sorry about Kenny.
马蒂 我对肯尼的事情很抱歉
Is there anything we can do?
有什么事情我们可以做的吗？
I'd love you to come to the memorial.
我希望你们来参加悼念会
- Oh, we wouldn't miss it. - I appreciate it.
-哦 我们不会错过的 -我很感激
Sorry, we have an early dinner to go to.
抱歉 我们有个早点的晚餐要参加
Dinner? It's 3:30.
晚餐？现在才三点半
- Dinner? - Hey, you better be at the memorial.
-晚餐？ -嘿 你最好出现在悼念会上
Oh, one sec.
哦等等
Hey, Cheryl, um, let me ask you a question.
嘿 谢丽儿 嗯 让我问你一个问题
When you're at Dr. Templeton's office...
当你在坦普顿的办公室时
we share the same therapist...
我们雇的同一个心理医生...
you ever notice how his chair is so much better and bigger
你有没有注意过他的椅子比他给我们准备的小椅子要
than that dinky chair that he gives to us?
大得多？
I've never thought about the chair when I was in therapy.
当我在理疗的时候我从来没想过椅子的事情
What... what do you think about that?
什么...你怎么想的？
I'm just so happy you're seeing somebody, pal, I really do.
我只是很高兴知道你在和谁见面 我真的很高兴
I think it's great. Do you like him?
我想这很好 你喜欢他吗？
I'm only seeing him because of the whole fatwa business, that's all.
我见他只是因为法特瓦的事情 就这么简单
- Believe me. - Well, don't make me sorry
-相信我 -呃 别让我后悔
that I recommended him to you.
因为是我向你推荐的他
I'm not talking about you.
我不会说到你的
- Okay. - Are you talking about me?
-好的 -你谈起我了吗？
- We should go. Yeah. - Yeah.
-我们该走了 的的 -是的
All I'm saying is next time you're there,
我想说的是下次你在那的时候
just be kind of aware of the chairs
稍微留意一下那里的椅子
and the striking difference between the two,
和两个椅子间的显著的差别
and tell me that I'm not crazy.
并且告诉我我并没有发疯
Uh, we do have reservations at Mélisse.
呃 我们在玛丽萨订了位子
- Do you know Mélisse? Ah! - Mélisse?
-你知道玛丽萨吗？哈！ -玛丽萨？
Good choice. It's truffle season.
好选择 现在是松露季
What?
什么？
How do you know it's truffle season?
你怎么会知道现在是松露季？
Dr. Templeton told me.
坦普顿医生告诉我的
What do you talk about in your sessions?
你们见面都聊些什么啊？
- That's okay. That's okay. Okay. - He loves truffles!
-没关系 没关系 好的 -他喜欢松露！
Ay, dah!
啊呀 哒
There's not enough room to get my hand in there
这里的开口不够大
to get the penis out.
把丁丁掏出来
I've never really come across this problem before.
我以前从没遇到过这种问题
Can't get my penis out of my pants?
丁丁从裤子里掏不出来
Have you ever heard of a short fly?
你有听过小叮裆吗
And I'm not gonna unbutton and have them drop on the floor.
我可不会把裤子全解开掉到地上
Look, here's a solution...
听着 有个办法
index finger, you take it, you go down,
食指 你把它送下去
put it in your zipper, press down on the shaft,
到拉锁的位置 按一下根部
allows your head to pop up.
丁丁就能立起来了
Pop up by itself. Huh.
自己起来 对
Press, pop up. Like tiddlywinks.
按 起来 就像挑圆片
Yeah, like tiddlywinks.
嗯 就像那个桌游
Those pants might've been manufactured
那条裤子的产地
in a country that has small penises.
可能那里的居民丁丁都比较小
So these pants fit the penis from whence they came.
也就是说裤门尺寸和产地的丁丁尺寸一致
You're goddamn right.
太对了
Why would they make a little fly in a country with big-ass dicks?
如果当地人丁丁都很大 为什么要做裤门小的裤子
See, I'ma tell you, I don't have that problem
你看 我跟你说我就没这毛病
'cause I buy my shit from Jamaica.
因为我这条是牙买♥♥加产的
My pants are slacks.
宽松儿的
The manufacturer, he makes jeans
厂家出的这些裤子
for people with big-ass fucking Johnsons, like me.
是给屌♥大无比的人准备的 比如我
Wow. When I go to the bathroom
哇 我上厕所时
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