消消气（2000）
Curb Your Enthusiasm S09E04
Part 1
Oct. 3, 2020, 1:49 p.m.
Salman Rushdie told me to live my life.
萨尔曼鲁西迪开导我要过自己的生活
And, you know, I'm not thinking about it as much as I used to,
然后 我确实没像原来那样在意了
and so far, so good.
现在情况挺好的
That's great.
很好
Oh, I know what I wanted to talk to you about.
噢 我知道我要给你说啥了
I'm having this dream.
我最近经常做这么个梦
- Right. - I've had it, like, three times.
-嗯 -得有三次了吧
I'm in this room and there's all these virgins...
梦里我在一个房♥间里 周围全是这些处♥女♥...
beautiful virgins, my God...
非常漂亮的处♥女♥ 我的天...
- and they all wanna have sex with me. - Wow.
-然后她们都想和我做♥爱♥ -哇哦
And I count... I keep counting them up,
然后我数...我不停地数有几个处♥女♥
and I can only count 71.
数来数去也只有71个
1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6... I'm counting with my head...
1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6...我靠点头来计数
Sometimes I'll start over... 1, 2, 3, 4...
有时候我得重新数...1, 2, 3, 4...
Right, the head count.
是 点一次头算一个
Are you expecting more or less?
比你预计的是多了还是少了？
I'm expecting 72.
我想着该是72个
What if you just miscounted?
如果是你数错了呢？
That's a possibility.
也有可能
So, were you tempted to have sex with them?
所以 你十分想和她们做♥爱♥吗？
Well, I wanted to, but I was too concerned
呃 我是想的 但我的精力完全在...
with the missing 72nd.
消失的第72个处♥女♥上了
- That was the issue. - What's interesting to me
-我的精力全在那上面了 -让我感兴趣的是...
is that I find you're focused on the number of women
我发现你的关注点全在女人的数量上...
who apparently are very interested in you, and yet...
而这些女人对你十分有兴趣 然而...
Larry, you seem preoccupied.
拉里 你看起来有心事
I'm just wondering...
我只是在想
have you ever noticed the disparity in these two chairs?
你有注意过这两把椅子的差别吗？
Your chair is so much better than this one.
你的椅子比这把好多了
This is not a comfortable chair at all.
这把坐着真是不舒服
Did... did you buy these chairs?
你...你买♥♥的这两把椅子吗？
Yes, I... I bought both of them.
是的 两把都是我买♥♥的
- You picked out both of them? - I picked them out, yeah.
-两把都是你买♥♥的? -是的 我买♥♥的
What was going through your head when you picked out this chair?
你选这把椅子的时候 你的心路历程是什么？
You picked out a great chair for yourself.
你给自己选了一把非常好的椅子
That's a gorgeous chair.
这椅子漂亮极了
I would have that in my house.
我都愿意买♥♥一把放家里
But this one, it's not comfortable.
但这一把 坐着就不舒服
I'm constantly shifting from side to side.
我得不停挪来挪去
You have the comfortable chair.
你自己的椅子倒是舒服
You have taken the good chair.
你把好椅子独占了
It's interesting... you are the first and only patient
有趣...你是第一个 也是唯一一个
who has ever said anything negative about that chair.
对这椅子有意见的病人
I don't find that interesting at all.
我不觉得这有啥有趣的
Well, I do, and that's my job... to find things interesting.
呃 我觉得有趣 我就干这个的... 找到有趣的地方
- Well... - Interesting with the chair.
-好吧... -对椅子有兴趣
- I don't know what you're writing over there. - Chair issues.
-我不知道你在那儿写啥 -椅子相关
I think there's something deeper.
我想这其中一定有更深的含义
I don't think you're writing anything.
我觉得你写的东西就没啥用
- No, I could show you. - Huh?
-没事 我可以给你看的 -哈？
- I could show you. - I mean, you're a nice man,
-我可以给你看我写的 -这么说吧 你是个好人
but, you know, do you... do you do that much?
但 你知道的 你...你真有那么大能耐吗？
- Between you and me? - Don't you think that I do
-就给我直说吧 -你不觉得我
a significant amount of help to you?
对你起到很大的帮助作用吗?
- Eh, no. - Really?
-呃 不觉得 -真的?
May I be honest with you?
我能说实话吗？
I hope that you can always be honest with me.
我希望你对我一直说实话
Well, I'm often never honest with you,
呃 对你我通常几乎不说实话
but here's what I'm proposing.
但我还是直说了吧
I think you should go chair shopping.
我觉得你应该去买♥♥把椅子
I think you need another chair.
我认为你需要另一把椅子
And you know what else? I'm willing to go chair shopping with you.
再者你猜啥？我愿意陪你去挑
- Will you think about it? - I don't know,
-你会考虑一下吗？ -我不知道
but I do know that the session is over,
但我知道这次见面到时间了
and so we'll have to pick this up next time.
所以我们得下次再聊了
It's tough for you to have to look at that watch, isn't it?
一定很难吧 你得偷着看那表 对吗?
It must be a little awkward. You know I see it.
肯定有点小尴尬吧 你知道我看到你偷瞄了
I know you see it. I'm not trying to sneak it.
我知道你看到了 我也没有打算藏着掖着
You can't... you're trying to do a little sneaky watch peek.
你不能...你就在趁我不注意偷瞄
I'm not trying to do a sneaky watch peek,
我没有趁你不注意偷瞄
I'm trying to be efficient with our time.
我是想让我们的时间更有效
Why don't you put a clock behind me
你为啥不在我后面这里放个钟呢？
so you can have a clock, you know, when the time's up?
这样时间到了 你看钟就知道了 不是吗？
- But, okay. - Nevertheless, it is... it is over,
-但是...好吧 -不管怎么说 时间的确是到了
and I'm looking forward to seeing you again next week.
我很期待下周再见到你
So, uh, you got big plans for the weekend?
所以 你周末有什么计划吗？
This weekend and all through next week
这周末直到下周
my wife and I go out every single night to a different restaurant
我妻子和我每天晚上都会出去 去不同的餐厅吃
because it's truffle season.
因为松露季到了
- It's wonderful. Do you like truffles? - No, I loathe them.
-妙极了 你喜欢松露吗？ -不喜欢 我讨厌松露
They're disgusting. Oh, to each his own.
恶心极了 唉 各有所爱吧
- To each his own. - Yeah.
-各有所爱 -行叻
Okay. Thank you, Larry.
好吧 谢了 拉里
- Okay. - And, by the way,
-好叻 -对了 顺便一说
any time you wanna get rid of me as a patient,
你任何时候不想要我这个病人了
just say, "I've had enough."
直接说"我受够了"就行
It'll be... it'll be okay with me.
我这儿没问题的
Oh, dear God.
我的天
Oh, dear.
天呐
Oh, dear.
天呐
Hey! How about this?
嗨 怎么评价？
I don't even know how to react.
我甚至不知道该做什么反应
It's unbelievable.
不敢相信
So, uh, over at the table over there,
我说 看那边那个桌子
the young lady in the red dress?
穿红裙子的那个女的？
Yeah, yeah, I saw her earlier.
嗯 嗯 我之前看到她了
She is a big -time real estate agent.
她是一个房♥产中介经纪人
- Yeah? - Okay, yes.
-是吗？ -是的
You looking for a house?
你在找房♥子？
Well, I'm gonna go out looking for houses,
这么说吧 我打算看一些房♥子
but I'm not looking for a house.
但我看的不是房♥子
Wow.
哇哦
What a diabolical plan this is.
鬼点子有点多啊
It's a date, but they don't know it's a date.
暗面上其实是约会 明面上谁会知道呢？
- Yes! - And if I want another date,
-对诶 -要是我想再来一次约会
"I just go, "You know what? This house doesn't appeal to me.
我只用说："你猜啥？这个房♥子我不喜欢
Tomorrow, are you good to see another house?"
明天能再带我看下其他房♥子吗？"
- Doesn't cost you a nickel. - Nope. Nope.
-一分钱也不用花 -那可不是
She's excited to be with me. She wants to please me.
她还很愿意和我在一起 她还想主动讨好我
- She wants to please you. - Yeah.
-她还会来讨好你 -正是
- Oh, hey. Look at this. - Thank you. I appreciate it.
-哦 嗨 看谁来了 -谢谢你 我很感激
- Thank you very much. - Oh, ho, ho!
-非常感谢你 -哦吼吼
They love me! They're loving it!
他们爱死我了 他们很喜欢我的画
- Ah! - Thank you very much.
-啊！ -谢谢
- Congratulations. - You don't have to buy any of them.
-恭喜 -你也不用非得买♥♥几张什么的
- You know... - Well, I wasn't gonna buy any,
-你知道吧... -呃 我没有打算要买♥♥
but, still, I can congratulate you.
但 还是祝贺你
Are you vying for the title
你这是在争夺
of the most pretentious man in the world?
全球最做作的人的称号♥吗？
- What, this? - Yes.
-啥？这个？ -是啊
I've had this for decades.
我穿这身穿了几十年了
It looks like the Little Drummer Boy's funeral.
你看起来像《小鼓手》里那个男孩死了
- This is what he's wearing in the casket. - Mm -hmm, that's very funny.
-他在棺材里穿的就是这个 -嗯哼 真好笑
I never showed you my paintings at home
我在家里从来没有给你们看过我的画
because I knew you would, you know, just mock me and destroy me, so...
因为我知道你们会嘲笑我 打击我的自信 所以...
- a big night for me. - Anyway, congratulations.
-今晚对我来说很重要 -不管怎样 恭喜你了
- Congratulations. - This is quite a display here.
-恭喜 -这个展示真棒
- Do you understand any of it? - No.
-你能看懂任何一个吗？ -不能
No, it's very confusing.
不能 非常令人困惑
- You don't under... - I don't think you do either.
-你不明白... -我也不认为你能看懂
消消气（2000）
Curb Your Enthusiasm
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