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-可以吗 -可以
- Yeah? - Yeah.
我要把你交给小凯舅舅抱 好吗
Okay, I'm gonna give you to Uncle Kev, okay?
你会超级喜欢他的
You're gonna love him.
他身上总有很昂贵的味道
And he always smells really expensive.
接住你了
I got you.
我是你的凯文舅舅
So I'm your Uncle Kevin.
我会教你怎么钓妹子
I'm gonna teach you how to pick up girls.
你说好不好 或者钓汉子
We're gonna do that. Or boys.
钓机器人也行 如果未来人们好这口的话
Or robots, if that's what people are into in the future.
感觉太棒了
Oh, this is great.
他简直完美
Oh, he's perfect.
克里夫真说他想亲我了吗
Cliff really said he wanted to kiss me?
真的 你去小吃棚后面
Yes. Just go behind the snack shack
他会在那里跟你碰面
and he'll meet you back there.
好
Okay.
凯特
Hey, Kate.
斯图尔特
Stewart?
"斯图尔特"
Oh, Stewart.
你以为会是谁
Who did you think it was gonna be?
克里夫·沃德
Cliff Ward.
你以为会是谁
Who did you think I was gonna be?
你
You.
我们可以原地站一会
We can just stand here for a minute
然后他们就会走了
and they'll all leave.
好
Okay.
还是算了
You know what?
别光站着
No.
跟我说说芝加哥的电影试镜通知吧
Okay, so tell me about this movie offer in Chicago.
这个啊 我应该不会接受
Yeah, I don't think I'm gonna take it, though, you know?
我还是打算... 留在这里陪你们
I think I'm gonna-- I'm gonna stay here with you guys.
因为我能帮上很多忙
'Cause I'm so helpful.
你要是能像心疼我一样
I wish that you would have
心疼心疼你自己就好了
as much compassion for yourself as you do for me.
去芝加哥吧
Go to Chicago.
把这部电影拍了 好好戒酒
Do this movie. Focus on your sobriety.
你这一辈子都是杰克的舅舅
You're gonna be Jack's uncle for your entire life.
你状态好起来才能照顾他
And he's gonna need you at your best.
他是全世界最幸运的孩子
He's the luckiest kid in the world
因为他有你这个妈妈 你知道吗
to have you as a mom, you know that?
对不对 你知道的吧
Aren't you? Do you know that?
让我瞧瞧你
Let me look at you.
真好看 你可真好看
Oh, you're gorgeous. You're gorgeous.
好了
Okay.
我是这么想的
So here's what's up.
我知道这些事谁都没经历过
I know this is all new
我也知道大家很担心
and I know that everyone is worried
担心这个家 担心我
about us and about me.
杰克看不见
Jack can't see,
但他能听见 有意识 有感觉
but he can hear, he can sense, he can feel.
我不想让这个家
And I don't want worry
弥漫着担忧的情绪
to be the prevailing feeling in this home.
我想让它充满希望
I want it to be hope.
我们一整天都在担心
I mean, we spent the entire day being worried about
怎么设限制才能保护好他
what we have to limit around here in order to protect him.
可这不是我们家的风格
That's just not how we roll in this house.
无意冒犯 安娜 对不起
No-- No offense, Anna, I'm sorry.
我知道那是你工作的
I know that's like a monster
-很大一部分 -没关系
- part of your job. - It's all good.
好的 我儿子这一生会无拘无束
Okay. My son is gonna live a life without limits.
我们这个家无法让他拥有视力
I know my family can't give him sight,
但我们一定能让他拥有自♥由♥
but they can damn sure give him that.
那 还有谁赞成
So... who's in?
你说"我是这么想的"时 我就赞成了
Well, you had me at, "Okay, so here's what's up."
妈
Mom?
我当然赞成 当然
Of course I'm in. Of course.
我知道现在正是家庭温馨时刻
I know that w-we're all trying to have a family moment,
可是他 简直 小裤裤里一塌糊涂
but he-- this is a-- his, uh, pants are a disaster right now.
他刚刚... 拉屎了
He's-- That's foul.
他刚刚笑了吗 你刚刚是不是笑了
Did he just laugh? Did you just laugh?
他刚刚咯咯笑了吗
Was that a giggle?
-真要这么做吗 -是的 必须做
- We really have to do this? - Yes, we have to.
首先 我们要做一件事情
And we're gonna do a thing first,
所以都站好
so settle in.
不可否认的是
Uh, there's no denying it.
你们三个都在慢慢长大
You three are getting old.
快变成大人了 所以我觉得是时候
Old as dirt. So I think it's time,
让你们几个来玩一个小游戏
uh, we let you girls in on a little game
我和你妈总玩
your mother and I play.
游戏的名字是"最糟糕状况"
It's called "Worst Case Scenario."
-不要 -反对无效
- No. - Ah.
好的 游戏的规则很简单
Now, the rules are simple.
我们轮流发言 先说"最糟糕的情况"
We all go around and we say "Worst case scenario,"
再说出接下来的生活中
and then our biggest fears as to the worst possible way
可能发生的最可怕的事
our lives could go from this move.
如果没有想说的可以不说 但...
Now, if you don't want to go, you don't have to, but...
最糟糕的情况
Worst case scenario:
由于兰德尔太自以为是
Randall never gets over himself
所以在接下来的四年里
and I have to spend the next four years
我都要像长发公主一样被困在房♥间里
trapped in my room like Rapunzel.
说得很好
That was good.
我学得很快
I'm a fast learner.
该我了
My turn.
最糟糕的情况
Worst case scenario:
明天黛佳乘巴士去学校
Tomorrow when Deja takes the bus to school,
她到了却忘记发信息告诉我
she forgets to text me the moment she arrives,
导致我对她进行强制禁足 直到她成年
and then I'm forced to ground her until she turns 18.
等等 你会让我...
W-W-Wait. You're gonna let me...
一到学校必须马上发信息给我
A text the moment you get to school.
每天都要发
Every single day.
遵命 先生
Yes, sir.
好的 最糟糕的情况
All right, worst case scenario.
我会把自己的想法投射到你们身上
that I project my own stuff on to you girls,
让你们无法感受到
making you feel anything less than
你们自己有多么优秀 美丽 独一无二
your wonderful, beautiful, wildly unique selves.
苔丝
Tess.
我没有最担心的事
I don't have one.
一件都没有吗
Nothing?
没有 费城很适合我
Nope. Philly looks good on me.
最糟糕的情况
Worst case scenario:
我所有老家的朋友都忘了我
All of my friends back home forget about me.
宝贝 你一直在担心这件事吗
Wow, babe. Have you been worried about that?
为什么你之前都没提过呢
Why didn't you say anything sooner?
我只是在逗你们玩
I'm just messing with you.
好吧
All right.
那...
So...
大家准备好了吗
We ready to do this?
-最后跑上台阶的人去买♥♥牛肉芝士三明治 -等等
- Last one up the steps is buying cheese steaks. - Wait.
-等等 -快跑
- Wait! - Go!
吃玉米片吗
Nacho?
好的 谢谢
Yes. Thanks.
怎么了
What happened?
我要化对凯特的担心为食欲
I'm just eating my worries about Kate.
别笑话我 好吗
Don't judge. Okay?
凯文刚刚问我 他是不是好人
Kevin asked me if I think he's a good person.
-什么 -没错
- What? - Yeah.
你怎么跟他说的
What did you tell him?
说了些 男人都很复杂之类的话
Something... Something about complicated men.
他感觉好些了吗
Did he feel better?
我不知道
I have no idea.
你还记得很久很久以前
Do you remember when we used to come here
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