生活大爆炸
The Big Bang Theory S07E17
Part 2
Oct. 5, 2019, 9:02 a.m.
You want to come with me?
你可以顺便去看看你妈
You can visit your mom,
我也可以带你参观太空中心
and I'll show you around the space center.
我有个问题
I have one question.
这是个恶作剧吗
Is this a prank...
会不会我们一到达休斯顿
where we land in Houston
那里会张贴着你做好的通缉令
and you've made up wanted posters
上面是我长着小胡子的照片 和一个西班牙名
that have my face with a mustache and a Spanish name
于是我会被逮捕并被遣送回南美洲
and then I get arrested and deported to South America?
不会
No.
那我就放心了 因为我肯定料不到你会这么玩
I'm glad because I would not have seen that coming.
艾米 我想请你帮忙
Amy, I could use some help.
我猜猜 是不是有位
Oh. Let me guess. There's an...
穿着皮衣的男大学生
undergrad in a leather jacket
在饮水机那里打着响指[西区故事中的混混]
snapping his fingers by the water fountain.
我认真想过你昨晚说的话
I thought about what you said last night,
于是我再次登上交♥友♥网♥站
and I went back on the dating Web site
我看见了这个女生的个人资料
and I was looking at this girl's profile.
她太完美了
She's amazing.
她长得不错
Oh, she's cute.
还很聪明 美国大学优等生荣誉学会会员
And smart. Phi Beta Kappa.
从她没有喉结这点可以判断出
And judging by her lack of Adam's apple,
她这辈子一直都是女人
she's been female her entire life.
我喜欢女人这一点
I like that in a woman.
很好 你需要我帮什么忙
Great, so what do you need me for?
我一晚没睡给她写了一封信
Well, I was up all night trying to write to her,
我想先听听你的意见
but I wanted to run it by you first.
好的
All right.
"艾米丽
"Emily,
你的脸颊就像被露珠吻过的花朵那么娇嫩"
your face is like a precious dew-kissed flower..."
我知道 很有震撼力吧
I know. Powerful stuff, huh?
不对啦
No.
你应该做自己 而不是像个
You're supposed to be yourself, not all...
饥渴又吓人的变♥态♥
desperate and creepy.
我就是那样的变♥态♥啊 那到底还要不要做自己
Okay, I'm getting some mixed messages here.
就写一些普通的东西 比如"我看了你的资料
Just say something normal like, "I saw your profile.
似乎咱俩有很多共同之处
Looks like we have a lot in common;
-有空一起去喝杯咖啡吧" -对
- let's get a cup of coffee sometime." - Yes.
"喝咖啡时 我会嫉妒咖啡杯
"Where I can be jealous of the cup
它能碰触你红宝石般的双唇"
touching your ruby lips."
或者干脆你帮我写吧
Or you just write it for me.
我才不要假扮你呢
I'm not gonna pretend to be you.
我不是要你假扮我
I don't want you to pretend to be me.
你可以当我的网络泡妞搭档
You can be like my, uh, online wingman.
好比如果我们是在酒吧遇到她 你就在一旁使劲夸我
Like if we met her at a bar and you talked me up.
那我应该跟她说什么
Well, what would I say to her?
告诉她我是个什么样的人
Just tell her what I'm really like.
如果你觉得有帮助的话
And, if you think it'll help,
可以说你曾见过我换衣服
that you saw me changing once
我的鸡鸡让你想到美洲虎肌肉发达的尾巴
and my package reminded you of the muscular tail of a jaguar.
用你自己的话去表达吧
Use your own words.
谢谢你载我去药房♥
Thanks again for taking me to the pharmacy.
别客气 你还好吗
Oh, it's no problem. Is everything okay?
我没事 这只是
Oh, I'm fine. It's just some, uh,
为我的旅行准备的胃药
stomach medication for my trip.
虽然可能性极小 但不排除
There's the remote yet distinct possibility
我可能会沦落到南美洲
that I may end up in South America.
还记得以前我会问你一些蠢问题吗
Remember the old days when I would've said something dumb
比如像"为什么"
like "why?"
这声音听起来不妙
Uh, that doesn't sound good.
还记得以前我会指出你上车后
Remember the old days when I used to point out
应该检查发动机警示灯是否亮着吗
that your check engine light was on?
-记得 -少女 准备重温旧梦吧
- Yes. - Well, get ready to stroll down memory lane:
佩妮 你检查发动机...
Penny, your check engine...
我知道灯是亮着的 谢尔顿
Yeah, I know it's on, Sheldon!
别别别 不要啊
Oh, no, no, no, no, no.
我现在可付不起修车费
I cannot afford this right now.
或许只是小问题而已
Maybe it's just something minor.
好消息是那警示灯灭了
Ooh, good news, the light just went out.
我们是各玩各的还是组队玩
Are we playing individual or teams?
组队有意思
Teams are fun.
这样的话 那我希望和我的好朋友
Oh, in that case, I'd like to be partnered
霍华德组队
with my good friend Howard.
可霍华德从来都跟我组队
But I'm always on Howard's team.
我们才是最好的朋友
We're best friends.
那种默契好到能完成对方的句...
The kind who finish each others...
-我不觉得我们有做这.. -这种事 你看
- I really don't think we do tha... - ...do that! See?
修车行怎么说
Oh, how'd it go at the mechanic?
不太妙 能借一步说话吗
Not great. Can I talk to you for a sec?
好啊
Yeah, sure.
我能跟你们一起去休斯顿吗
Maybe I can go with you guys to Houston?
现在买♥♥机票是不是有点...
Isn't it a little late to get plane tick...
...有点晚吗 没错
...plane tickets? Yeah.
求求你别再闹...
Will you please sto...
...别再闹了 好的
...stop that? Okay.
我真不知道该如何是好
I don't know what to do.
我的车坏了 彻底报废了
My car threw a rod and it's totaled.
可我工作也没了 又买♥♥不起新车
I can't afford a new one, I have no job,
现在我连试镜都没办法去
and now I can't drive to auditions.
真遗憾
I'm so sorry.
我知道这件事你不爱听
I know it's a sensitive subject,
可你能重新考虑一下那个电影角色吗
but can you reconsider that part in the movie?
我考虑了 我打了电♥话♥ 人家不要我了
I did. I called them. The part's gone.
那个角色已经被别人抢走了
They gave it to someone else.
现在那姑娘马上就要一夜成名
Now that girl's gonna get discovered and become famous
然后去访谈秀大聊特聊她是如何
and go on Letterman and talk about
从一部廉价的猴子电影中一举成名的
how she got her big break on a cheap monkey movie
这都多亏了某个傻妞当初不屑去演
all because some dumb girl thought it was beneath her.
这样你至少还在访谈秀上被提起了啊
At least they talked about you on Letterman.
别这样 你想去哪儿 我都开车载你
Come on, I can drive you wherever you need to go.
怎么可能 你和我不一样 你有工作呀
How? Unlike me, you have a job.
我唯有回去当我的服务员
I'm just gonna have to go back to being a waitress...
这将成为我一辈子的工作
...like I will be for the rest of my life.
莱纳德 你麻利一点好不好
Leonard, would you wrap it up?
我们都在等你呢
We're waiting on you.
对不起 是不是我苦难的人生
I'm sorry, is the fact that my life's falling apart
打扰到您崇高的桌游了
interfering with your board game?
是的
It is.
你错了 吾友霍华德
You were wrong, friend Howard.
她完全能理解我们的状况
She completely understood.
你现在忙吗
Hey, you busy?
不忙 什么事
No. What's up?
艾米丽回信了吗
Have you heard back from Emily?
回了
I have.
太好了 说什么
Great! And?
恐怕她觉得你俩不合适
And I'm afraid she doesn't think you're right for her.
我给了你一个这么简单的任务
I give you one simple thing to do--
联♥系♥一个素未谋面的陌生人
contact a complete stranger
让她爱上我
and make her fall in love with me--
你却连这都办砸了
and you blow it!
我把你的好都告诉她了 可是
I told her what a good guy you are, but
她觉得你不肯亲自给她写信
she thought it was a bad sign
这就不是什么好兆头
that you didn't write to her yourself.
她觉得你显得太害羞 太被动了
She thought it made you seem too shy and passive.
人家才不害羞和被动呢
I'm not too shy and passive.
你马上回信给她 把我的话告诉她
You write her back and tell her I said that.
当然 等你有空的时候
You know, when you have a second.
明晚我会试着改变她的想法
Look, I'll see if I can change her mind tomorrow night.
明天晚上有什么事
What's happening tomorrow night?
我要和她出来喝咖啡
I'm meeting her for coffee.
什么
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The Big Bang Theory
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