公园与游憩（2009）

Parks and Recreation S02E15

Part 4 Jan. 27, 2024, 11:42 a.m.

我不饿
I'm not hungry.
你们也不好笑
And you guys aren't being funny.
你为什么表现这么奇怪
Why are you being weird?
我们开这种人的玩笑这就是我们经常做的啊
We make fun of people like that. That's what we do.
要知道作为一对同性恋情侣你们真的很同性恋
You know, for a gay couple, you guys are being really gay.
我说 "我当然记得你你是贞洁对吧"
I said, "Of course I remember you. You're Chastity, right?"
Leslie
Leslie!
虽然我没邀请你但你还是来了
Even though I didn't invite you, you came here anyway.
我尊重这样因为你作为一个自♥由♥美国人做出了选择
I respect that, because you made a choice as a free American.
你在吃什么啊
What are you eating?
我把这叫做"草坪和草皮"
I call this "turf and turf."
是一份480克的T骨和一份680克的腰肉
It's a 16-ounce T-bone and a 24-ounce porterhouse.
当然还有威士忌和雪茄
Also, whiskey and a cigar.
我会同时消灭这些东西
I'm gonna consume all of this at the same time
因为我是个自♥由♥的美国人
because I am a free American.
室内禁止吸烟先生
No cigars inside, sir.
行我在外面把它全部抽完
Fine. I will smoke the entire thing outside.
虽然它对我不好我还是会做的
Even though it is bad for me, I am going to do it.
他为什么这么混♥蛋♥
Why is he being such an ass?
说来话长
It's a long story.
外面冻死了所以我不会抽这根雪茄的
It's freezing outside, so I will not be smoking this cigar.
但放心我想的话肯定会抽因为这...
But rest assured, I could if I wanted to, because this...
这是美国对吧是吗
This is America, right? Is it?
我能跟你聊两句吗
May I speak with you, please?
听着我不知道你是故意这么混♥蛋♥
Look, I don't know if you're being a jerk on purpose
来证明你有权利做混♥蛋♥
just to prove you have the right to be a jerk,
但不管怎样你就是混♥蛋♥
but either way, you're being a jerk.
所以给拿着这个饮酒指南
So, here. Take the booze chart.
你在逗我吗 - 不
Are you kidding me? - No.
如果你非要喝酒那你就该用上好吗
If you're gonna drink, you should use it, okay?
我准备走了
I'm gonna head out.
顺便说下可能不关我事
By the way, maybe it's none of my business,
如果你每天都吃1.3公斤牛排你会死掉
but if you eat three pounds of steak every day, you're gonna die,
虽然我已经写好了你的悼词
and although I've already written your eulogy,
而且特别感人但我暂时还不想读出来
and it's incredibly touching, I would prefer not to give it for a while.
顺便说第一行
The first line, by the way?
"哦队长我的队长啊
"O Captain! My Captain!
Ron Swanson 一首最终作品"
Ron Swanson, a swan song."
是的后面的更精彩
Yeah, and it gets better from there.
April April
April! April!
下班后想看我在停车场轮滑吗
You wanna watch me rollerblade in the parking lot after work?
我很棒的
I'm pretty awesome.
我以前很厉害但那是60斤之前
I used to be really good. That was, like, 70 pounds ago.
我不行有点忙
I can't. I'm kind of busy.
哦挺没意思明天呢
Oh, that's lame. Tomorrow?
可能吧我不知道
Maybe. I don't know.
好吧拜
Okay. Bye.
开玩笑的我不会摔的
Just kidding! I don't fall!
我...
I...
你在吃什么
What are you eating?
我没空吃早饭
I didn't have time to have breakfast.
我要把它们丢到外面垃圾桶了
I'm gonna toss these in the dumpster outside.
我也不想待会儿看到你在里面翻
And I don't wanna see you digging around in there later.
我很抱歉
I am sorry.
我最近是个马屁混♥蛋♥
I have been a horse's ass.
我要说的话说完了
And that is the end of what I have to say.
接受道歉
Apology accepted.
穿上外套外面冻死了
Put a coat on. It's freezing outside.
Jerry Jerry
Jerry! Jerry!
我是DJ伦巴的鬼魂
This is the ghost of DJ Roomba.
你为何杀了我
Why did you kill me?
我做鬼都不放过你 Jerry
I'm gonna haunt you, Jerry.
我会跟着你
I'm gonna follow you
同时不停循环播放黑眼豆豆的
and play the Black Eyed Peas on a non-stop loop!